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hooked

A few one-liners

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The closest I ever got to a 4.0 in college was my blood alcohol content.
I don't approve of political jokes...I've seen too many of them get elected.
There are two sides to every divorce: Yours and shithead's.
I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
I am a nobody, and nobody is perfect; therefore I am perfect.
Everytime I walk into a singles bar I can hear Mom's wise words: "Dont't pick that up, you don't know where it's been!"
J

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