Let's talk about PETS

[Slappie 9]

Here is something for the "Cat Lovers" in the crowd. Which I am one!! My cat is 22lbs of hacking furball but I LOVE HIM!! I can see him reciting this as he curls up for a nap......
Cat Prayer
Now I lay me down to sleep,
I pray this cushy life to keep
I pray for toys that look like mice,
and sofa cushions, soft and nice.
I pray for gourmet kitty snacks,
and someone nice to scratch my back.
For windowsills all warm and bright,
for shadows to explore at night.
I pray I'll always stay real cool,
and keep the secret feline rule.
To NEVER tell a human that,
The world is really ruled by CATS!
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[Slowfaller 0]

BOOOOO! BOOO on Cats. Dogs are much er
I'll go to college; learn some big words; I'll talk real loud god damn right I'll be heard.

[freeflir29 0]

"BOOOOO! BOOO on Cats"
What do you mean? Cats are great...that get that really suprised look when you twirl them by the tail and fling them across the yard.... (just kidding PETA warriors)
"I only have 133 jumps, so I don't know shit..right?"-Clay

[Slappie 9]

Not diss'n dogs.. I just happen to live in a condo and to confine a dog inside all day is not So LAY OF MY CAT!
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[Slowfaller 0]

Cats make my eyes red, my nose runny, my skin itch and I'll sneeze a lot. The idea of punting a cat and watching it fly through the air makes me laugh (see male bashing) not a small dog......ok, a small dog makes me laugh too
I'll go to college; learn some big words; I'll talk real loud god damn right I'll be heard.

[skycat 0]

I have both a dog and a cat, they are both cool....the dog for rough housing, going hiking (she has her own saddle bags), bringing to the DZ to pick up men, you know dog things. The cat is cool cause you can tie a pull up cord to his tail and he will chase that thing for hours. (note to self don't do this again while he is on the coffee table) Plus the dog really loves having the moving toy. Actually my cat is more dog like, he will follow me everywhere, and is my little loverboy, my dog on the other hand give me attitude when tell her to get off the bed. (yes she actually does know this command just doesn't like it)
Kelli

[skybytch 273]

Quote

when you twirl them by the tail and fling them across the yard...

Oh, my cat Ripcord (Ripper for short) would have loved you... he had a thing for ripping large sections of skin off anyone who fucked with him... and to him, petting him "wrong", hell, LOOKING at him wrong, was fucking with him!
Gosh I miss him... best protection a girl could ever have....
pull and flare,
lisa
--
What would Scooby Doo?

[kingbunky 3]

at last count i had:
2 dogs ( a shih tzu and a jack russel terrier)
3 cats (all useless in my book)
2 ferrets (the most amusing pet ever!)
1 chinchilla (it's my daughter's, still haven't figured out the point of it)
that's it, unless you count kids as pets, then there's 4 of those as well.
"Jumping out of planes for the thrill of it all."
-J.Geils Band

[freeflir29 0]

"jack russel terrier"
Coolest dogs on the planet!!!
"I only have 133 jumps, so I don't know shit..right?"-Clay

[kingbunky 3]

i like mine, even though he's an idiot. my fault for not teaching him anything (or teaching him everything i know, your pick). i took him back to the breeder to see if he would make a good stud but she said he had too much colour, he was smooth coated, he is short and has too big a chest, all reasons why i like him! his name is harley, because when he was a pup he was the biggest of the litter so they took to calling him fatboy. i named him (and bought him) sight unseen, and never regretted it, except for the three different sofa's he chewed all to hell.
"Jumping out of planes for the thrill of it all."
-J.Geils Band

[freeflir29 0]

"except for the three different sofa's he chewed all to hell."
At least they are only puppies for 6 mos or so instead of the two years it takes a lab to stop chewing and digging up everything....."I only have 133 jumps, so I don't know shit..right?"-Clay

[kingbunky 3]

well, he's 4 now, i think he quit eating furniture at about 2. he is cute, but sofa's are expensive!
"Jumping out of planes for the thrill of it all."
-J.Geils Band

[freeflir29 0]

"he is cute, but sofa's are expensive!"
Beatings are free.......
"I only have 133 jumps, so I don't know shit..right?"-Clay

[AggieDave 6]

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1 chinchilla

I had a friend who had one. He thought it was a male, so when another friend of his' male chinchilla needed a place to stay for a couple days while the owner was out of town, he put him in the same cage. Well, to make a long story short he woke up some time after all of this to a strange sound, he thought his male chinchilla was dying, but he noticed the addition of a handful of other furballs in the cage...it wasn't male...it was really funny actually.
"I said don't look Ethel, It was too late, she'd already been incensed... "

[kingbunky 3]

reminds me of a cat we had when i was young, we called it jimmy, but it had lots of kittens
"Jumping out of planes for the thrill of it all."
-J.Geils Band

[JDBoston 0]

My chinchilla used to blow himself. There was no mistaking that he was male.
Joe

[kingbunky 3]

why do dogs lick their nuts?
because they can!
"Jumping out of planes for the thrill of it all."
-J.Geils Band

[skycat 0]

My cousin had a cat that everyone ended up forgeting her name cause she was always having kittens. So we all just called her momma kitty. Good thing my grandparents had a farm so all the kittens always had a good home to go to.

[kingbunky 3]

we lived on a farm at the time too, so they all ended up at the neighbours or in the barn.
hey, lookie there, i'm an old hand! next stop, post whore! look out clay!
"Jumping out of planes for the thrill of it all."
-J.Geils Band

[GrumpySmurf 0]

Cats are ok,
ferrets are better - especially after a bath *heh* They go apa-freakin-pletic!
My last one was an albino female I named, "No-No-Bad-Ferret' - since that is all she heard - she looked like a rat with fangs and a fuzzy tail. She had issues with socks, towels, phone chords, g/f's, vacumn cleaners, remote controls - you name it, she had issues with it, and it *HAD* to be subdued and then drug under the couch - she once tried to drag the vacumn cleaner by the power cord under the couch - then got supremely ticked off when it wouldn't fit.

[dmddave 0]

I have an 80lb golden retriever who loves cats and everything else for that matter and a 150lb rottweiler who hates cats with an unbelievable passion (sorta like me).

[Slappie 9]

Calling in sick to work makes me feel very uncomfortable. No matter how
legitimate my illness, I always sense my boss thinks I am lying.
On one occasion, I had a valid reason, but lied anyway because the truth
was just too humiliating. I simply mentioned that I had sustained a head
injury and I hoped I would feel up to coming in the next day. By then, I
could think up a doozy to explain the bandage on my crown.
The accident occurred mainly because I conceded to my wife's wishes to
adopt a cute little kitty. Initially the new acquisition was no problem,
but one morning I was taking my shower after breakfast when I heard my
wife, Deb, call out to me from the kitchen. "Ed! The garbage disposal is
dead. Please come reset it for me. "
"You know where the button is. " I protested through the shower
(pitter-patter). "Reset it yourself! "
"I am scared! " She pleaded. "What if it starts going and sucks me in?"
(Pause) "C'mon, it'll only take a second. "
So grudgingly out I came, dripping wet and buck naked, hoping to make a
clear statement about how her cowardly behavior was not without
consequence. I crouched down and stuck my head under the sink to find the
button. It is the last action I remember performing. It struck without
warning, without respect to my circumstances. Nay, it wasn't a hexed
disposal drawing me into its gnashing metal teeth. It was our new kitty,
clawing playfully at the dangling objects she spied between my legs. She
had been poised around the corner and stalked me as I took the bait under
the sink. At precisely the second I was most vulnerable, she leapt at the
toys I had so unwittingly offered and snagged them with her needlelike
claws.
I lost all rational thought to control orderly bodily movements, while
rising upwardly at a violent rate of speed, with the full weight of a
kitten hanging from my masculine region.
Wild animals are sometimes faced with a "fight or flight" syndrome. Men, in
this predicament, choose only the "flight" option. Fleeing straight up,
the sink and cabinet bluntly impeded my ascent; the impact knocked me out
cold.
When I awoke, my wife and the paramedics stood over me. Having no doubt
been fully briefed by my wife, the paramedics snorted as they tried to
conduct their work while suppressing hysterical laughter.
At the office, colleagues tried to coax an explanation out of me. I kept
silent, claiming it was too painful to talk about. "What's the matter,
cat got your tongue? "
If they had only known!
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[freefallfreak 0]

Slappie,
Roflmao...Cool story...I had a kitten once...and we had an old bathtub that sat on clawed legs...at 6 am, I was sitting in the bathroom (the morning after we got the cat), doing my business. The little fur ball (hiding under the tub) jumped, (very quietly, I might add), to the tank on the back of the toilet, and from there, onto my poor bald head...Needless to say, we had a fight and I was left with claw marks from the sides of my head all the way to the top...I don't have the cat anymore...lol.
TripleF
What a long, strange trip it has been...

[chickenhawk420 0]

Tigers and panthers whoop dogs

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[Slowfaller 0]

They sure do
I'll go to college; learn some big words; I'll talk real loud god damn right I'll be heard.