Smart Old Man

[Muenkel 0]

SMART OLD MAN

A woman decides to have a facelift for her birthday. She spends $5,000 and feels pretty good about the results.
On her way home she stops at a newsstand to buy a paper.
Before leaving, she asks the sales clerk, "I hope you don't mind my asking, but how old do you think I am?"
"About 32," the clerk replies.

"I'm actually 47," the woman says happily.

A little while later she goes into McDonald's and upon getting her order, asks the counter girl the same question.
She replies, "I'd guess about 29."

The woman replies, "Nope, I am 47."

Now she is feeling really good about herself. While waiting for the bus home, she asks an old man the same question.
He replies, "I'm 78 and my eyesight is starting to go. Although, when I was young, there was a sure way to tell how old a woman was, but it requires you to let me put my hands up your shirt and feel your breasts. Then I can tell exactly how old you are."
They waited in silence on the empty street until curiosity got the best of the woman and she finally says, "What the hell, go ahead."
The old man slips both hands up her shirt, under her bra,
and begins to feel around. After about 20 seconds she says, "Okay, Okay, how old am I?"
He removes his hands and says, "You are 47."

Stunned the woman says, "That is amazing. How did you know?".

The old man replies, "I was behind you in line at McDonald's."

If you're not confused, you're not paying attention.
Chris

[TheMarshMan1 0]

I know several old guys who I could definitely picture pulling something like that, lol!!! "If I could be like that, I would give anything, just to live one day, in those shoes..."

[Muenkel 0]

For some reason I picture Clay at age 78 doing this.
If you're not confused, you're not paying attention.
Chris

[freeflir29 0]

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For some reason I picture Clay at age 78 doing this.

78??? I used that just yesterday at the mall......"It's all about the BOOBIES!"

[TheMarshMan1 0]

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I used that just yesterday at the mall...

Manicans are expensive, Clay...they don't like you playing with those...
"If I could be like that, I would give anything, just to live one day, in those shoes..."

[SkydiveMonkey 0]

ROFLMAO !!!
Danger could be my middle name. But it's Paul.

[freeflir29 0]

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Manicans are expensive

I'm not sure what those are but if you say they are expensive, I'll believe you....."It's all about the BOOBIES!"

[TheMarshMan1 0]

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I'm not sure what those are

Well, they are typically found in displays in stores at the mall. They look somewhat realistic from the waist to the neck. I've even seen some with nipples! ...kinda like a blow-up doll, only plastic. "If I could be like that, I would give anything, just to live one day, in those shoes..."

[freeflir29 0]

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...kinda like a blow-up doll, only plastic.

Main Entry: man·ne·quin
Pronunciation: 'ma-ni-k&n
Function: noun
Etymology: French, from Dutch mannekijn little man -- more at MANIKIN
Date: 1730
1 : an artist's, tailor's, or dressmaker's lay figure; also : a form representing the human figure used especially for displaying clothes
2 : one employed to model clothing
Hard to recognize with that wonderful gift you have for spelling....."It's all about the BOOBIES!"

[TheMarshMan1 0]

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Hard to recognize with that wonderful gift you have for spelling...

LOL...well its not every day I get to spell mannequin!
"If I could be like that, I would give anything, just to live one day, in those shoes..."

[coconutmonkey 0]

Watch for splinters!

[freeflir29 0]

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watch for splinters

I wear gloves...."It's all about the BOOBIES!"

[coconutmonkey 0]

Sorry Clay, I wasn't thinking about your hands... though, they would transmit the splinter infection...

[flyhi 24]

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Main Entry: man·ne·quin
Pronunciation: 'ma-ni-k&n
Function: noun
Etymology: French, from Dutch mannekijn little man -- more at MANIKIN

You're smarter than I. I went to the Atlas and looked for Manica. Figured it was a small country in the Mediterranean region.
flyhi