koune 0 #1 July 3, 2002 Okay, simple question: is this normal in America..??? Because, in that case, I'm never going there... http://www.theonion.com/onion3510/awkward_sex_encounter.html Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jtval 0 #2 July 3, 2002 thats funny! the Onion rules!My photos My Videos Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Skystorm 0 #3 July 3, 2002 My ex was a virgin. And the part stating doors locked, blinds drawn, lights out, ect. was exactly what he did. It was frustrating to say the least. Luckily I began skydiving, dumped him and found someone much more exiting.... "Forced to repeat this beautiful experience" ???? WTF? I volenteer (sp?)! Gene Police: "YOU!! Out of the pool, NOW!!!" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
koune 0 #4 July 3, 2002 ROFL, my favorite sentences: "insertion was somewhat complicated by John's refusal to assist the navigation process" "we may be forced to repeat this beautiful experience." OH MY GOD...GRINN Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skymama 37 #5 July 3, 2002 LMAO, I had so many favorite lines, I can't decide which one to comment on. But, since he heard the vagina kind of smells bad, I guess oral sex is out for the poor girl!She is Da Man, and you better not mess with Da Man, because she will lay some keepdown on you faster than, well, really fast. ~Billvon Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jfields 0 #6 July 3, 2002 QuoteI guess oral sex is out for the poor girl! I don't think the guy will be getting any oral either. Man, what a drag for both of them. No religion will tell me what I can and can't do in bed... unless I move to somewhere the religion condones polygamy. Ladies, do you know that polyandry and accepted practice in some parts of Nepal... oh... wait... women can get that any time they want. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
koune 0 #7 July 3, 2002 Hmm, I've been to Nepal two times. And didn't notice anything. Damn! IMHO Nepali women aren't that attractive (and yes, that's subjective) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SniperCJ 0 #8 July 3, 2002 Wow, it was even "gloriously tolerable", "endurable beyond my wildest dreams", and ,gasp, "noticeably pleasurable". Geez, I think Ive been doing it wrong all this time. JC Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bbarnhouse 0 #9 July 3, 2002 Oh puhleeeeeeeeez!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
freeatlast 0 #10 July 3, 2002 If it is normal in america I'm staying in the UK I now know what I missed by not saving myself ... Sigh .... I guess I'll just have to carry on or become a born-again virgin - I think it's a recognised religion .... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
rgoper 0 #11 July 3, 2002 am i correct in my belief that this story is offered in jest? i don't know what else to say.--Richard-- "We Will Not Be Shaken By Thugs, And Terroist" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sebazz1 2 #12 July 3, 2002 Quotetouching himself—an act the Bible strictly prohibits Just one more reason I am going to hell Oh well Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
AndyMan 7 #13 July 3, 2002 Quoteam i correct in my belief that this story is offered in jest? Yes. Go to www.theonion.com and read the rest of their articles. The Onion is a weekly satire newspaper. EVERYTHING is satire. _Am__ You put the fun in "funnel" - craichead. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jceman 1 #14 July 3, 2002 QuoteOkay, simple question: is this normal in America..??? Yes, to have satirical sites like The Onion is quite normal. We tend to be a nation of smartarses. though not quite as bad as the Brits. Faster horses, younger women, older whiskey, more money. Why do they call it "Tourist Season" if we can't shoot them? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Jasmin 0 #15 July 3, 2002 Ever been to Utah? Y'anyways, I used to be a Catholic Youth Minister....After two nationals, a world meet and an 8 month relationship I resigned my post.....The latter is the relevant bit!!!! Each to their own, if you believe in religion promoted abstinence, good for you. If you stuff up: go to confession for forgiveness for your sins. Personally, I agree with the original french author (you try and finish his book, "Women"....): "I don't see the sin in satisfying one's desires...." xj "Be good......or be good at it!"xj "I wouldn't recommend picking a fight with the earth...but then I wouldn't recommend picking a fight with a car either, and that's having tried both." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Jasmin 0 #16 July 3, 2002 PS Please note the quote refers to encounters that harm and degrade no-one.....no sadist or masochist reference intended...xj "I wouldn't recommend picking a fight with the earth...but then I wouldn't recommend picking a fight with a car either, and that's having tried both." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
billvon 3,086 #17 July 3, 2002 >no sadist or masochist reference intended... Well isn't that too bad . . . Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
AndyMan 7 #18 July 3, 2002 QuoteWell isn't that too bad . . . See? SEE? BILL BROUGHT IT UP! _Am__ You put the fun in "funnel" - craichead. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
fasterfaller 0 #19 July 3, 2002 WTF ? No comment from Clay , he must not be at work today . I laughed my ass off while reading that . Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
quade 4 #20 July 3, 2002 Ah, is there nothing as confusing for people not in on the joke as satire?quade - The World's Most Boring Skydiver Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
PhillyKev 0 #21 July 3, 2002 QuotePS Please note the quote refers to encounters that harm and degrade no-one.....no sadist or masochist reference intended... What if I'm a masochist....by denying me the degradation I desire, doesn't that harm me? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
cloudseeker2001 0 #22 July 3, 2002 How fucking stupid! that's about all i can say! "Some call it heavenly in it's brilliance, others mean and rueful of the western dream" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
PhillyKev 0 #23 July 3, 2002 Apparently sarcasm goes over just as well Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Jasmin 0 #24 July 3, 2002 [replyWhat if I'm a masochist....by denying me the degradation I desire, doesn't that harm me? The quote meant without sadism or violence, my views are not necessarily reflected AND I added it to stop Clay insulting others.... tee hee heexj "I wouldn't recommend picking a fight with the earth...but then I wouldn't recommend picking a fight with a car either, and that's having tried both." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
PhillyKev 0 #25 July 3, 2002 QuoteThe quote meant without sadism or violence, my views are not necessarily reflected So you'll spank me if I ask nicely? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
So you'll spank me if I ask nicely?
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