nws01 0 #1 July 25, 2002 The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the EU rather than German which heavily lobbied to be the official languauge and was the other possibility. As part of the negotiations, Her Majesty's Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5-year phase-in plan that would be known as "EuroEnglish." In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c" . . . Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favor of the "k." This should klear up konfusion and keyboards kan have 1 less letter. There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year, when the troublesome "ph" will be replased with the "f." This will make words like "fotograf" 20% shorter. In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters, which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horible mess of the silent "e's" in the language is disgraseful, and they should go away. By the 4th yar, peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and the "w" with "v." During the fifz yar, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and similar changes vud of kors be aplid to ozer kombinations of leters. After ze fifz yar, ve vil hav a realy sensibl vriten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubls or difikultis and evryvun vil find it easy tu understand each ozer. ZE DREM VIL FINALI KUM TRU! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
wingnut 0 #2 July 25, 2002 that's prety good...... on a actual note... isn't german the nantional tounge of the most contries though??? (okay so it's one of 4 in switzerland)... ______________________________________ "i have no reader's digest version" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
nws01 0 #3 July 25, 2002 You have already accepted the 5 year change in your posts Wingnut. I have reached the 3 year plan! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BPO 0 #4 July 25, 2002 Quoteisn't german the nantional tounge of the most contries though I'd say: NO! But... great joke! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kallend 2,150 #5 July 25, 2002 QuoteGovernments will enkourage the removal of double letters, which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horible mess of the silent "e's" in the language is disgraseful, and they should go away. Zuldn't zat be "horible mes"? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
