confident vs. cocky

[SBS 0]

ok, so where's the line???

Assuming that it would be incredibly difficult to be the perfect balance of confident and humble, in which direction is it better to error? Too humble, or too confident (i.e.- cocky)? It SEEMS like people would answer that it's better to be too humble...BUT, the people who are pushing the limits and sometimes even passing the limits of overconfidence are the ones that seem to be more successful in different aspects of life...business, the ladies, etc.

input?

-S

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I'm not conceited...I'm just realistic about my awesomeness...

[Sebazz1 2]

[crickets]creek...creek...creek...creek...creek...creek...creek...creek...creek...creek...creek...[/crickets]

[Viking 0]

god crickets suck i hate those damn things!!

I swear you must have footprints on the back of your helmet - chicagoskydiver
My God has a bigger dick than your god -George Carlin

[SatchFan 0]

When it comes to the ladies....cockiness is better. I see it every weekend. Find the biggest asshole in the bar and he's got all the women. Even if he's uglier than homemade sin. Go figure! I guess there is some truth to nice guys finish last.

[FliegendeWolf 0]

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ok, so where's the line???

Confident is feeling positive about yourself, cocky is feeling that you can do abslutely no wrong.

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Assuming that it would be incredibly difficult to be the perfect balance of confident and humble, in which direction is it better to error? Too humble, or too confident (i.e.- cocky)? It SEEMS like people would answer that it's better to be too humble...BUT, the people who are pushing the limits and sometimes even passing the limits of overconfidence are the ones that seem to be more successful in different aspects of life...business, the ladies, etc.

This depends on your perspective. I could be described as being too humble, but I do not desire the lifestyle of the megabusiness leader or womanizer. I am satisfied (or at least try to be) with what I have. Other people might not be. I guess it's whether you're speaking in terms of ethics or rugged individualism.

A One that Isn't Cold is Scarcely a One at All

[Deuce 1]

Other confident people see you as confident.

Weak, insecure people see you as cocky.

Same difference between risk taking and recklessness. Point of view.

[SBS 0]

Good point.

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I'm not conceited...I'm just realistic about my awesomeness...

[Schroeder 0]

I remember it was a sad day that my mom agreed that often, the nice guys do finish last. In the working world, I've found that as a young man, in an older work environment (engineers, geologists, etc.) I need to have confidence in my work, and in my abilities, and it's gotta be something people can pick up on. If you want to establish yourself, I'd say confidence is crucial, if you want to stay cool when you're flying too close to the top, and don't wanna piss people off, there's a time to be humble as well. Ultimately, I believe, you want to be in a position where you do superb work, and are humble about it, while not being lost in the chain of command (ie. recognized). If you can do that, the rewards will be great.

With women... that'a tough one. I personally have found that it all depends on what type of woman you're after. Sure the cocky guy might have chicks crawling all over him at the bar, but I _personally_ would avoid those women in the first place. I found that the types of women I wanted were few and far between in the first place, and therefore, I had to come to grips with the notion that I'm not gonna meet them at every streetcorner. But they're out there.
I think that after all is said and done, everyone likes confidence. So be confident in what you know, and what you can do, but at the same time understand the duality beween confidence and humility. It's almost a matter of advertising.

If I ventured in the slipstream; Between the via-ducts of your dreams.......could you find me?

[FliegendeWolf 0]

Not sure I agree with you, Deuce. One can take a risk without being reckless, and one can take a risk through being reckless. Recklessness implies a lack of calculation or preparation when taking a risk. Example: there is an inherent risk in skydiving-we all take the same risk. However, there are some people who exacerbate that risk through, I don't know, downsizing too soon, hooking turns with low jump numbers, jumping while intoxicated, etc. These activities are reckless, whereas skydiving itself is not inherently so.

Likewise with cockiness and confidence. One can be confident without being cocky (even in the eyes of someone with low self-esteem), but there is most definately a line to be drawn.

In both cases you have categories and instances: recklessness is an instance of a bigger category of risk, cockiness is an instance of a bigger category of confidence.

A One that Isn't Cold is Scarcely a One at All

[SBS 0]

I think the point was that there is a line, but at the same time, how other people view someone will be dependant upon that person's state of mind just as much as that of the person who is being evaluated.

I would love to live by that phrase that says something like "It is far better to have others discover your greatness than for you to advertise it"...don't remember it, but you get the point...

Anyway, it's unfortunate that if you don't advertise it and make a big deal out of little things, more times than not, they go unnoticed (i.e. - going out of your way for a friend, or for work, etc.), and the person who goes out of their way to make sure that everyone knows is the one who will get the promotion, etc. It's frustrating. (no, that is not a specific example from my life)


-S

_____________
I'm not conceited...I'm just realistic about my awesomeness...

[FliegendeWolf 0]

SBS,

I think you're absolutely right in saying this. However, that one needs to advertise their better qualities does not mean that cockiness and confidence are exactly the same thing filtered by two people's different viewpoints.

Steve

A One that Isn't Cold is Scarcely a One at All

[Jessica 0]

Oh my God. Whatever. Notice the "ladies" haven't bothered to chime in. It's because we're annoyed by all this cockiness.

Skydiving is for cool people only

[DJL 235]

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Other confident people see you as confident.
Weak, insecure people see you as cocky.

No, that doesn't make sense. It's true that cocky people are confident but it's not true that confident people are cocky. That's my logic for today.

I don't think cockiness, to a certain degree, is a poor attribute. Talking smack is fun.

-Doug

"I encourage all awesome dangerous behavior." - Jeffro Fincher

[freeflir29 0]

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It's because we're annoyed by all this cockiness.

Well...except for Freaksis and Moodyskydiver. They apparently haven't experienced much cockyness lately....

[DJL 235]

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but I _personally_ would avoid those women in the first place.

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I had to come to grips with the notion that I'm not gonna meet them at every streetcorner.

That is the finest of subtlety.

-Doug

"I encourage all awesome dangerous behavior." - Jeffro Fincher

[SatchFan 0]

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It's because we're annoyed by all this cockiness.

Well...except for Freaksis and Moodyskydiver. They apparently haven't experienced much cockyness lately....

Uh, I don't get it....

[DJL 235]

Actually, I recant. MY logic isn't exactly true either. The fact is that cocky people are not necessarily confident. For a lot of people, running their mouth is a big bluff to hide their insecurities.

-Doug

"I encourage all awesome dangerous behavior." - Jeffro Fincher

[Dumpster 0]

The line is simple- Confident persons know when they're in over thier head and aren't too proud to ask for help or bail out if need be.
Cocky persons usually wind up gettin' thier asses kicked sooner or later-
It's up to you to determine your limits- how far you push it before you back the throttles off-
Also depends on wether you don't mind eating a little humble pie now and then-

Easy Does It

[freeflir29 0]

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running their mouth is a big bluff to hide their insecurities.

99.99999%

[Schroeder 0]

You're sharp.

If I ventured in the slipstream; Between the via-ducts of your dreams.......could you find me?

[rendezvous 0]

same difference between risk taking and recklessness
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But then again, recklessness is not something that is relative to risk taking. It's absolute. What I mean is:
Learning hook turns with enough experience under the canopy and a good training regimen amounts to risk taking, even though it is a calculated one. Same thing with 50 jumps under your belt is outright recklessness by any definition.

[SBS 0]

Some people think that skydiving is reckless...we think it's risky.

Some would think that base jumping is reckless...generally we look at it as more risky.

Someone who is anti-swooping would look at getting a tiny high performance canopy as reckless...I look at it as risky.
I see what you are saying, but it really is, in many cases, a matter of perspective.

-S

_____________
I'm not conceited...I'm just realistic about my awesomeness...

[Sinkster 0]

The trouble with the world is that the stupid are cocksure and the intelligent are full of doubt.
--Bertrand Russell

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[Deuce 1]

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Some people think that skydiving is reckless...we think it's risky.

Some would think that base jumping is reckless...generally we look at it as more risky.

Someone who is anti-swooping would look at getting a tiny high performance canopy as reckless...I look at it as risky.
I see what you are saying, but it really is, in many cases, a matter of perspective.

-S

Yeah, dammit, what he said. My Nana would think that skydiving was a wreckless disregard for my life unjustifiably putting my family in jeapordy.

I think it's a reasonable risk. Besides, my kids classmates all think I'm cool, and that makes them cool.

My kids classmates moms are all hot for me. Chicks dig skydivers.

I'm confident of that.

[skygal3 0]

I work for a company that has several different depts...and I manage one of them. The other older women always had a problem with me from day 1...finally I approached them and asked why and one woman told me that she "did not like me" because I am "too confident"...hmm...I was shocked by this...since when is confidence a bad thing? And the funniest part is that half of the time I was faking it because I was the new girl, in the new town, didn't know a soul! trying to keep pace with older (mostly men), and a pretty insecure person on top of all of that (more so because of that)...I mean, I was (am?) totally at a loss, being younger, female!!! and this woman had the audacity to tell me that she didn't like my confidence! I asked her is she preferred that I be a shrinking violet, but if I was, I wouldn't have lasted a week...the company is 98% male, you would think that the women should stick together but even today after 6 months of being there they do everything they can to make me feel like an outsider...but I am still confident in my work and the customer satisfaction reflects that...a point that they refuse to accept...so my weakeness are illuminated in their eyes...