Friday Funnies

[Sebazz1 2]

25 Signs you’re getting older…

1. Your houseplants are alive, and you can't smoke any of them.
2. Having sex in a twin bed is out of the question.
3. You keep more food than beer in the fridge.
4. 6:00 AM is when you get up, not when you go to bed.
5. You hear your favorite song on an elevator.
6. You watch the Weather Channel.
7. Your friends marry and divorce instead of hook up and break up.
8. You go from 130 days of vacation time to 14
9. Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as "dressed up."
10. You're the one calling the police because those damn kids next door won't turn down the stereo.
11. Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around you.
12. You don't know what time Taco Bell closes anymore.
13. Your car insurance goes down and your payments go up.
14. You feed your dog Science Diet instead of McDonald's leftovers
15. Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt.
16. You no longer take naps from noon to 6 PM.
17. Dinner and a movie is the whole date instead of the beginning of one.
18. Eating a basket of chicken wings at 3 AM would severely upset, rather than settle, your stomach.
19. You go to the drug store for ibuprofen and antacid, not condoms and pregnancy tests. 20. A $4.00 bottle of wine is no longer "pretty good stuff."
21. You actually eat breakfast food at breakfast time.
22. "I just can't drink the way I used to," replaces,"I'm never going to drink that much again."
23. 90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real work.
24. You no longer drink at home to save money before going to a bar.
25. You read this entire list looking desperately for one sign that doesn't apply to you.

[Sebazz1 2]

Another priceless joke....

[Sebazz1 2]

What nobody liked these?

[kingbunky 3]

no, they're funny, but i think the first one was posted earlier this week, and the other has been up twice in the last week or two. sorry sebazz, ya gotta keep up! you take a day or two off and...

"Hang on a sec, the young'uns are throwin' beer cans at a golf cart."
MB4252 TDS699
killing threads since 2001

[Sebazz1 2]

Ooops my bad...

[lummy 4]

See that's what happens when you don't invite me out for Drinks with the rest of the Labor day 6 , I felt SOOOO slighted ;)

I promise not to TP Davis under canopy.. I promise not to TP Davis under canopy.. eat sushi, get smoochieTTK#1

[Spy38W 0]

Quote

Ooops my bad...

How about the Friday Mantra by Sebazz? It's been awhile

BTW, did you ever get that Javelin?

--
Hook high, flare on time

[celljumper 0]

I have a headache today Seb-Thursday night beers with skydivers is ruining my Fridays...

[Sebazz1 2]

Rookie!! Oh and meg... That's you FIRST post Beeeeeeeeeeeeer!

Just kiddin... Call me after work today.. Peace!

[celljumper 0]

Headin down tonight? watch out for all the smoke....fire is still on the mountain from what I hear.

[celljumper 0]

no more beeeeer....not for a while....i'll give ya a ring a ding ding after work

[flyhi 24]

President Bush and Colin Powell are sitting in a bar.



A guy walks in and asks the barman, "isn't that Bush and Powell sitting over there?" The barman says, "yep, that's them".



So the guy walks over and says, "Wow, this is a real honor. What are you guys doing in here?"



Bush says, "We're planning WWIII".



And the guy says, "Really? What's going to happen?"



Bush says, "Well, we're going to kill 140 million Iraquis and one blonde with big tits".



The guy exclaimed, "A blonde with big tits? Why kill a blond with big tits?"



Bush turns to Powell, punches him on the shoulder and says, "See, Smart Ass, I told you no one would worry about the 140 million Iraqis".

Shit happens. And it usually happens because of physics.