Airhead 0 #1 October 3, 2002 I COULD REALLY USE SOME HELP HERE! I've made 9 jumps so far. 8 of the 9 were while my 7-yr-old daughter had been at her Dad's for the weekend. I really only felt free enough to spend good amount of time down at the DZ to train every other weekend. BUT the more I get into this, the more I want to be able to be at the DZ to jump. SO, I TOLD MY EX-HUSBAND THAT I AM REALLY GETTING INTO SKYDIVING last weekend when I went to pick up my daughter from his place. ...And that I have been in training to learn and am working towards getting my skydiver's licence. I really wasn't sure what his response was gonna be, but fortunately, it wasn't bad. I even said that I'm trying hard to get training in before winter, and that if he'd like to have her for an extra weekend, it'd be fine with me. Just let me know. He actually (surprise)said that that was something that he's thought about doing before too... But, no problems so far! Anybody had hassles with their EX because of skydiving? I'm treading lightly and cautiously. I could really use some advice here. THANX - Lila. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
freeflir29 0 #2 October 3, 2002 What's an Ex going to do about it? It would be pretty hard to make any kind of case out of it unless you are spending the night and getting stoopid drunk at the DZ. Other than that...if he does have anything to say...tell em to piss up a rope. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Dumpster 0 #3 October 3, 2002 My self, no problems with my ex at all- I even take my 15- yr old daughter to the DZ with me when she is out for her 2-4 weeks in the summer. She's learning how to pack and saving for her first jump and subsequent training- ( And I have to remind the DZ rats she is ONLY 15!!!!) But i don't stay really late or get drunk when she is with me- i have to make sure we get home safe- Now if you were to ask if my current wife gives me static, that would be a yes - but it hasn't become a hazard - yet - (I'm more worried about the current wife--) Easy Does It Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Airhead 0 #4 October 3, 2002 Some EX's are real jerks... Like some other peoples Exs, My Ex tends to be passive-aggressive towards me. I'm just worried that he'll try to get between me and my kid, or as a custody issue to bring up later when it comes to weekends, summers, etc. Plus, there really is a risk element, and I've thought about the need to discuss "what if"s...Like if I get hurt or worse...Yet wonder if I should even go there. Ya know? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lazerq3 0 #5 October 3, 2002 QuoteBUT the more I get into this, the more I want to be able to be at the DZ to jump. The only thing I have to say is you can give up many thing to replace it with skydiving...lord knows I did...(what the hell is sking!!) But dont give up too many weekends to spend at the DZ instead of being with your kid...I know I'd spend EVERY weekend there if I wasnt married with children but it takes a lot of comprimise to do both...Now before anyone flames me I'm not saying your going to give up your kid to skydiving...I'm just saying if you can try and include them and make a weekend fun for all.. hell then your kid willl be begging to come with you and think your the coolest!! and as for the EX......if he supports you cool if not O'well..tell him to go get a hobby!! jasonFreedom of speech includes volume Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dropdeded 0 #6 October 3, 2002 Its my current wife that isn't quite as supportive as she used to be,had a hard landing,off work for 7 more weeks(me,not her).She dont think I have my priorities straight.Life goes on.So will my skydiving. dropdeded------------------------------------------ The Dude Abides. - Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skymama 37 #7 October 3, 2002 My ex is very supportive, and he doesn't have any problems with me skydiving. I would just caution you on giving your daughter to your ex for extra weekends so you can skydive. To me it seems that would send a message to your daughter that your skydiving is more important than spending time with her. After all, she's just a kid, she wouldn't understand why you made that choice. I've only jumped once in the last 8 weeks because my ex is taking a class in the weekends so I have the kids. Is it killing me on beautiful days that I'm not jumping? Sure it is. But, since they are 11 and 13, they don't like going to the dz because it's boring to them to sit around and watch me have fun, which I can understand. So I stay home with them and remember that the dz will still be there in a few weeks and I've had alot of fun with them on those weekends too.She is Da Man, and you better not mess with Da Man, because she will lay some keepdown on you faster than, well, really fast. ~Billvon Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Airhead 0 #8 October 3, 2002 No I don't replace my little girl to jump instead of being with her. The first time I went to a DZ, I went with a bunch of people form my family to watch my brother and neice do a tandem. My daughter was with and had a great time (she was only 6 then) running around outside with a couple other little kids and Last time she came with me, in August, my sis came with too and I did my last tandem. But there were no other kids there and although she got a kick out of watching me, she didn't have as much fun with out others to play with. But I DO think she'll get more of a kick out of the DZ and all that goes on as she gets a little older...And we'll have more fun there together, especially once I get thru training and (hopefully) there is less time just waiting around. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
freeflir29 0 #9 October 3, 2002 Quotewhat the hell is sking!! I have no idea. Skiing I have done.....but sking I'm not sure about. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lazerq3 0 #10 October 3, 2002 Uhhhh yeah what the hell is sking!!!!??? You know what I meant.....smart ass!! jasonFreedom of speech includes volume Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
freeflir29 0 #11 October 3, 2002 QuoteYou know what I meant.....smart ass!! You were expecting something else? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
weegegirl 2 #12 October 3, 2002 Two words.... RED, SILVER! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
DENGOPHER 0 #13 October 3, 2002 no problems with my x ... the kids love going to the dz.. you should take your daughter some time to see what she thinks... just jump!!! gopher Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
PhreeZone 20 #14 October 3, 2002 >No I don't replace my little girl to jump instead of being with her. And I did'nt want to replace all my friends with jumping but when you get hooked it tends to happen. I know of one person that gave up on some of their custody to have more time to put towards training, professional development and jumping. They felt it was'nt fair for the child to be in day care or alone so they are having their family watch the child more and more.Yesterday is history And tomorrow is a mystery Parachutemanuals.com Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
wmw999 2,588 #15 October 3, 2002 I've only jumped once in the last 8 weeks because my ex is taking a class in the weekends so I have the kids. Is it killing me on beautiful days that I'm not jumping? Sure it is. But, since they are 11 and 13, they don't like going to the dz because it's boring to them to sit around and watch me have fun, which I can understand. So I stay home with them and remember that the dz will still be there in a few weeks and I've had alot of fun with them on those weekends too. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Been there, done that. To me it was well worth it. My son is 18 now, and skydiving is back in my life. When we were married, it was hard because of the lack of support and hassle; when we were divorced, I got busy all of a sudden. Skydiving doesn't grow nearly as quickly as the kids do, and it's still there when you go back. If you can find a DZ they enjoy, great. But not all are that enjoyable. Wendy W.There is nothing more dangerous than breaking a basic safety rule and getting away with it. It removes fear of the consequences and builds false confidence. (tbrown) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #16 October 3, 2002 "But, since they are 11 and 13, they don't like going to the dz because it's boring to them to sit around " My son was 13. He was bored, but he also liked to go to school on Monday and tell all the other kids about his "Sunday at the dz". We were at the mall and found those 2-stick toys that flip around a 3rd stick. He loved it. When I was in the air, he would practice. He got amazingly good. It became "his thing" to do for people. If your child is taking guitar lessons, practice time. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Dumpster 0 #17 October 3, 2002 The wife told me that if I get unjured, no more jumping- Well, we'll see about that if and when it happens- I think there may be a conflict if it ever does happen---! Easy Does It Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Quincy 0 #18 October 3, 2002 Airhead sez...<<>> I've missed more weekends than I can count because it was my weekend with my sons. That's the only way it's gonna be. I'm not going to "pass" on them for anything...PERIOD...!!!... End of discussion...!!!... I have absolutely NO REGRETS for this commitment. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kinney29 0 #19 October 3, 2002 My Ex-almost-wife definetly doesn't hassle me about skydiving since she is the one that introduced me to the sport. However she has threatened bodily harm if I ever get more jumps/ratings than her. Go Big or Go Home Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mouth 0 #20 October 3, 2002 My EX-almost-wife?????? As for my kids. I have them every other weekend so I can hit the DZ fairly frequently. I have taken them to watch me jump but since there are no kids ther anymore they get bored quickly. During the summer my ex is supposed toget them 4 weeks but doesn't because of work. I generally trade a weekend or two or three with him since I'm off all summer and we can play during the week then they can have fun with their dad on the weekends and I can play with the gang at the DZ. Lately I haven't had any time off without the girls so I've missed out on the DZ scene or weather has been nasty. I guess you have to choose what is most important to you. Lisa -- Hot Mama At least you know where you stand even if it is in a pile of shit. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kinney29 0 #21 October 3, 2002 We backed out, litterally hours before going through with it. It was just the two of us going to the justice of the peace. Go Big or Go Home Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Cajones 0 #22 October 3, 2002 Then she better get her arse in the air! The laws of physics are strictly enforced. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Thanatos340 1 #23 October 3, 2002 I have had no end of problems with my ex about skydiving. I first tried to get into skydiving in 1992. Did a couple static line jumps and the ex went ballistic because our daughter was on the way. She said I was being irresponsible, I finally gave in and quit. (We ended up splitting up that year anyway). I started a Tandem Progression in 97, she found out had the same response and succeeded in guilting me into quitting again. This year I showed her life insurance policies with General aviation riders in place to prove to her that she would still get money if I burned in. This time she finally let up (she just wanted to know if she could help pack the parachute for me for some strange reason). I am half way through AFF now and hope to be cleared for solo by the end of the month. The 10 year approach to skydiving (kinda like the 6 year bachelors degree). My 10 year old daughter is cool with me jumping but does not want to go to the DZ at all for some reason. I think Mom has told her I am going to kill myself of something. Thanatos340 No eternal reward shall forgive us now for the wasting of the dawn. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
