ONE LINERS FOR THE STRESSED & IRRITATED

[Phil 0]

1."Okay, okay! I take it back. Unfuck you!!!"
2. "You say I'm a bitch like it's a bad thing?!"
3. "How many times do I have to flush before you go away?"
4. "Well this day was a total waste of make-up"
5. "Well aren't we a Bloody ray of sunshine?"
6. "Don't bother me, I'm living happily ever after."
7. "Do I look like a Fucking people's person!?"
8. "This isn't an office. It's HELL with fluorescent lighting"
9. "I started out with nothing & still have most of it left"
10. "I pretend to work, they pretend to pay me"
11. "YOU!!... off my planet!!!"
12. "Therapy is expensive. Popping bubble plastic is cheap. You choose"
13. "Practise random acts of intelligence and senseless acts of self-control"
14. "Errors have been made. Others will be blamed"
15. "And your cry-baby, whiny-assed opinion would be.....?"
16. "I'm not crazy. I've been in a very bad mood for 30 years."
17. "Sarcasm is just one more service I offer."
18. "Whatever kind of look you were going for, you missed"
19. "Do they ever shut up on your planet?"
20. "I'm not your type. I'm not inflatable"
21. "Stress is when you wake up screaming and you realise you haven't gone to sleep yet"
22. "Back off!! You're standing in my aura."
23. "Don't worry. I forgot your name too."
24. "I just want revenge. Is that so wrong?"
25. "I work 45 hours a week to be this poor."
26. "Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it."
27. "Not all men are annoying. Some are dead."
28. "Wait...I'm trying to imagine you with a personality"
29. "Chaos, panic and disorder . . . my work here is done."
30. "Ambivalent? Well yes and no."
31. "You look like shit. Is that the style now?"
32. "Earth is full. Go home."
33. "Aw, did I step on your poor itty bitty ego?"
34. "I'm not tense, just terribly, terribly alert."
35. "A hard-on doesn't count as personal growth."

...
..
.

how high can you fly with broken wings ...
life's a journey not a destination

[ernokaikkonen 0]

Well _these_ won't be relieving the stress in the workplace...

[sangiro 26]

36. "Start one joke thread and post all your jokes to that. Don't spam."

Safe swoops
Sangiro

[skymama 37]

heh....I was wondering what HH was referring to because this was the first thread I read...THEN I got through all the other ones. Gee whiz, Phil! Did you do that to all your friends on your e-mail list too?

She is Da Man, and you better not mess with Da Man,
because she will lay some keepdown on you faster than, well, really fast. ~Billvon

[Phil 0]

what friends ?

No I don't, but they just kept on coming in this morning and instead of editing the first post, I just created a new one - oh well I know better for next time.

bfd

...
..
.

how high can you fly with broken wings ...
life's a journey not a destination

[christoofar 0]

Quote

36. "Start one joke thread and post all your jokes to that. Don't spam."

Getting agitated over the lion posting I see?

____________________________________________________________
I'm RICK JAMES! Fo shizzle.