corporate lessons

[Sonic 0]

Corporate lesson 1

A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her
shower when the doorbell rings. After a few seconds of arguing over which
one should go and answer the doorbell, the wife gives up, quickly wraps
herself up in a towel and runs downstairs. When she opens the door, there
stands Bob, the next-door neighbour. Before she says a word, Bob says,
"I'll give you 800 dollars to drop that towel that you have on." After
thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and stands naked in front
of Bob. After a few seconds, Bob hands her 800 dollars and leaves.
Confused, but excited about her good fortune, the woman wraps back up in
the towel and goes back upstairs. When she gets back to the bathroom, her
husband asks from the shower: "Who was that?" "It was Bob the next-door
neighbour," she replies.

"Great," the husband says, "did he say anything about the 800 dollars he
owes me?"

Moral of the story: If you share critical information pertaining to
credit and risk in time with your stakeholders, you may be in a position
to prevent avoidable exposure.
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Corporate lesson 2

A priest was driving along and saw a nun on the side of the road, he
stopped and offered her a lift, which she accepted. She got in and
crossed her legs, forcing her gown to open and reveal a lovely leg. The
priest had a look and nearly had an accident. After controlling the car,
he stealth fully slid his hand up her leg. The nun looked at him and
immediately said, "Father, remember psalm 129?"
The priest was flustered and apologised profusely. He forced himself to
remove his hand. However, he was unable to remove his eyes from her leg.
Further on while changing gear, he let his hand slide up her leg again.
The nun once again said, "Father, remember psalm 129?"
Once again the priest apologised. "Sorry sister but the flesh is weak."
Arriving at the convent, the nun got out gave him a meaningful glance
and went on her way. On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to
retrieve a bible and picked up psalm 129. It Said, "Go forth and seek,
further up, you will find glory."

Moral of the story: Always be well informed in your job, or you might
miss a great opportunity!

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It's like something out of that twilighty show about that zone

[quade 4]

OK, not to get too picky about it, but . . .

Psalms 129

1 A Song of Ascents. "Sorely have they afflicted me from my youth," let Israel now say-- 2 "Sorely have they afflicted me from my youth, yet they have not prevailed against me. 3 The plowers plowed upon my back; they made long their furrows." 4 The LORD is righteous; he has cut the cords of the wicked. 5 May all who hate Zion be put to shame and turned backward! 6 Let them be like the grass on the housetops, which withers before it grows up, 7 with which the reaper does not fill his hand or the binder of sheaves his bosom, 8 while those who pass by do not say, "The blessing of the LORD be upon you! We bless you in the name of the LORD!"

quade -
The World's Most Boring Skydiver