freeflyz 0 #1 November 14, 2002 A farmer buys several pigs,hoping to breed them for ham,bacon,etc.. Arter several weeks ,he notices that none of the pigs are getting pregnant and calls the vet for help.The vet tells the framer that he should try artificial insemination.The farmer doesn't have the slightest idea what this means but,not wanting to display his ignorance,he only asks the vet how will he know the pigs are pregnant.The vet tells him that they will stop standing around and will instead lay down and wallow in the mud when they are pregnantThe farmer hangs up and gives athis some thought.He comes to conclusion that artificial insemination means that he has to impregnate the pig.So he loads the pigs in his truck ,drives them out to the woods and has sex with them all,brings them back and goes to bed.Next morning he wakes and looks out at the pigs.Seeing that they are all standing around he concludes that the first try did't take and loads them up in the truck again.He drives them out to the woods and bangs each pig twice for good measure,brings them back and goes to bed,Next morning he wakes to find the pigs still standing around!One more try,he tells himself,and proceeds to load them up in the truck and drives them to the woods.He spends all day shagging the pigs and upon returning home ,falls listlessly into bed.The next morning he cannot even rise hmself from bed to look at the pigs.He ask his wife to look out and tell him if the pigs are laying in the mud."No", she says they're all in the truck and one of them is honking the horn!!!!!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
PhillyKev 0 #2 November 14, 2002 It's funnier with sheep: http://www.dropzone.com/cgi-bin/forum/gforum.cgi?post=278040;sb=post_latest_reply;so=ASC;forum_view=forum_view_collapsed;;page=unread#unread Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Brisco 0 #3 November 14, 2002 A young college student makes a deal with a local farmer to buy a mule. He pays the farmer $200 and the farmer is to deliver the mule the next morning. The next morning the farmer shows up and tells the student he's got some bad news. "The mule died last night", he says. Disappointed, the student says, "No problem. Just give me back my money and I'll look for another one." The farmer says, "Well, unfortunately, I can't return your money right now because I already spent it." The student thinks for a moment and then says, "Ok, give me the dead mule. The farmer asks the student what he's going to do with a dead mule and the student tells him that he's going to raffle it off. The farmer says, "You can't raffle off a dead mule!", to which the student replies, "Sure I can!" A couple of weeks later the farmer runs into the student and asks him how he made out with his dead mule raffle. The student tells him that he sold 200 tickets at $10 each, netting him a profit of $1790!! The farmer asks, "Didn't anyone get angry when they found out the mule was dead?" "Only the winner", says the student, "so I gave him his $10 back! Brisco Experience is what you get when you don't get what you want. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
freeflir29 0 #4 November 14, 2002 Quote It's funnier with sheep: Definately... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
