nws01 0 #52 September 26, 2002 and Nathan began taxiing the big airplane down the ramp... He has flown a plane or two (thanks Spy) and he puts it to full throttle and lifts off the runway going 165 mph. He begins his rapid climb and remembers he has never landed a plane before so he looks to his friend... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Deuce 1 #53 September 26, 2002 Clearly Nathan's mind was blank as he tried to trim the aircraft as it climbed into the sky. "It looked a lot easier in the Airplane movies" " I know! I'll email Diverdriver from my internet cell phone and he'll tell me what the hell to do!" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
diver123 0 #54 September 26, 2002 down the ramp... Until he saw a bunch of DZ.comers chasing after him in go-carts. Frozen in fear, her forgot one tiny detail, the plane! As the speed increased and the gear started rising from the ground, a huge... "pull high! It's lower than you think..." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skybytch 273 #55 September 26, 2002 a huge... pair of boobies appeared before Nathan and the entire group of DZ.commer's eyes. They were gigantic! The guys were all awestruck. Clay reached out to touch one and as he did... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest #56 September 26, 2002 Quotea huge... pair of boobies appeared before Nathan and the entire group of DZ.commer's eyes. They were gigantic! The guys were all awestruck. Clay reached out to touch one and as he did... ...one of his fingers reached out to tweak a nipple, but his sharp fingernails pierced the flesh of the enormous boobie. Thus punctured, all the air in the enormous bazooms suddenly began rushing out, and when it did, the female-shaped balloon they were attached to began hissing madly as it flopped this way and that all over the freakin' sky like some kind of crazy Wile E. Coyote bonanza! Holding onto the tether, he was cartwheeled to and fro like Indiana Jones on a bad hair day. Gradually, the female-shaped balloon ran out of gas, and as he slowly descended, he lightly touched down, the flaccid remants of immense mamaries collapsing all around him. When he finally struggled out from under the gas-mams, he found himself in..."The mouse does not know life until it is in the mouth of the cat." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Jumperpaula 0 #57 September 27, 2002 QuoteQuoteWhen he finally struggled out from under the gas-mams, he found himself in... ..his own bedroom tangled in his silk sheets. Thank God that was just a really bad dream. He was sweating and breathing heavy when he heard a knock on the door. Wondering who it could be at this hour, he opened the door, forgetting he was completely naked and saw..... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites happythoughts 0 #58 September 27, 2002 ... a pair of wryly smiling female Jehovah's Witnesses. He invited them in, pausing to put on his silk boxers with the pic of Yosemite Sam, and then sat down on the couch with a scotch/rocks in one hand and the shapely thigh of the brunette JW in the other. He pressed the play button on his VCR. He was expecting to see the porn video he had left in the previous morning, but was surprised to see... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Slappie 9 #59 September 27, 2002 but was surprised to see... A three piece band of leper bovines belting out "God Save the Queen" in g minor. Shaking his head trying to remove the thoughts of lust he felt for the bassoon playing bovine. He remembered the two women he had invited into his house. They were standing in total shock an amazment staring at him when..... "Find out just what any people will quietly submit to and you have found out the exact measure of injustice and wrong which will be imposed upon them." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Jumperpaula 0 #60 September 27, 2002 Quote, but was surprised to see... ...Willing to Fly? Someone has definately been in his apartment. But the ladies thought it was so sensative of him to be watching a video with so much poetry and beauty and started snuggling up to him. He dimmed the lights and started kissing the blonde. The brunette jumped and, apparently jelouse said "You can't kiss my girlfriend like that." He was shocked but very excited. His next move would be... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Slappie 9 #61 September 27, 2002 CUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Paula I think my cow story line fits Clay better then him actaully getting 2 lesbian women in his place... ROLLUM!!!!!!!!! "Find out just what any people will quietly submit to and you have found out the exact measure of injustice and wrong which will be imposed upon them." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites happythoughts 0 #62 September 27, 2002 He was shocked but very excited. His next move would be to get out his Kathy Kuffs and the squeezy-bear honey bottle from the cabinet. The girls told him that they would be tormented for their sins and he said "let me count the ways". Normally a tidy man, on the floor he noticed... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites nws01 0 #63 September 27, 2002 he noticed... his velcro gloves. He started daydreaming about his sheep and poodles and decided that his heart is with them. He asked the ladies to leave and he grabbed his gloves, got in his jeep and... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites happythoughts 0 #64 September 27, 2002 ...got in his jeep and there sat his favorite sheepy friend, listening to the radio and pawing anxiously at the floorboard. He started singing with the radio "Only Ewe...." and threw his gearbag into the back, hoping he had his... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites nws01 0 #65 September 27, 2002 hoping he had his video camera in there because when he watches himself with the poodles and shhep afterwords it turns him on even more. Especially this one tape where... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites happythoughts 0 #66 September 27, 2002 ...one of the poodles was dressed as Little Bo-Peep. That only got him thinking of how confusing the story had been to him as a child. "...has lost her sheep and doesn't know where to find them" Duh! The definition of lost. "...leave them alone and they'll come home" If they're lost, you have to. "...wagging their tails behind them" Oooohhhh, the exciting part. The poodle dressed as LBP had that haughty, pensive look and it reminded him of they way his ex-g/f had... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites nws01 0 #67 September 27, 2002 it reminded him of they way his ex-g/f had looked so beautiful and pensive and he thought he was in love. Then he ended up on a Jerry Springer Show where his girlfriend came out and told him she was actually a he. But he was fortunate though. Because before leaving the show he met another guest that had problems with... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites happythoughts 0 #68 September 27, 2002 had problems with nymphomania and palsy. She wasn't really a nympho, but everytime she put her hand in someone's lap, they got so turned on that she ended up in some midget dungeon hold a space-toy, a whip, and telling them... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites nws01 0 #69 September 27, 2002 and telling them... the story about when Bill Von was last there. Appearently he is really into S&M and whips and leather and chains. She said she did not understand him though because he used big words such as... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites happythoughts 0 #70 September 27, 2002 because he used big words such as jumentious. She really likes intelligent men. That is why she replaced her poster of Brad Pitt with one of the Supreme Court justices in garters. It may have been photoshopped, but it aroused her when she thought of their... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites nws01 0 #71 September 27, 2002 Story to date.......... It was hot out today. I walked into the packing tent. It was as sticky and humid as Brad Pitt's pits. There she was, trying a little too hard to bend over as she was tying the stow bands. Her quick small fingers made work of the lines. Her shiny pin necklace dangled from her neck. "Mmmmmm, those thighs," I thought to myself. Was she showing him the way? Was she holding back? Was he holding back? Fear is the mind killer. A skydive might help to clear her head. If only she could find someone to jump with and get that weird guy to quit stalking her. She walked away as he was talking to her, which really pissed him off. That's when he turned to side. His interesting bulges reminded her of the old bass fisherman's saying "throw the little ones back and mount the big ones". She never forgot the summer that she worked on a fishing boat as a baiter. It didn't take her long to make an impression on all the seamen. Under the tutelage of the ships Master Baiter, she had quickly learned the ropes were good to hang onto while the Seaman banged her from behind. Every night they would take turns gang banging until the boat assignment was over and she went to Texas where she took up Skydiving. She wondered if he was in the van getting another blowjob. She wondered if the seatbelt had crammed up his ass, like it used to do with her. She wondered how a Tandem Master like him could manage a blow job from every Tandem chick that came through the dropzone. Just then Bill walked up and asked...."Dude, what are you doing? Do you have time to give me a blow job?" She grabbed his testicles and squeezed them as Bill fell to the ground in pain. She said, what the hell is an oscilloscope?? I was going to give you a bj too before you asked such a stupid question now I'm just gonna try to get on a Load and make a skydive. She wandered around the DZ seeing who was there and what was going on. All she saw was a 4 way practicing on creepers, a couple of freeflyers gearing up in a hurry, Tandem students hanging around watching the sky. Finally , she decided she would grab one of the people just off student status and do a free coached jump. She introduced herself to this guystanding by himself next to the soda machine and said, “wanna learn to fly head down?” "But I'm just off student status! Is this the norm?" To which she replied "It's cool, your cleared to fun jump, unless you don't want to." He thought about it. He had seen the video's of the Flyboyz and he thought it was really cool, but never thought he'd be trying it right off Student Status. She was so pretty, and so sweet to ask him to jump and he didn't want to say no. After some serious thought, he said He looks at her with the tandem rig and said, "Thanks, but I don't think Im ready for head down yet. I wanna get some more experience on my belly first. At least 50 jumps or so. Do you still want to jump with me?" She looked at his humble face beaming at her, now she was the one who didn't want to say no. He was kinda cute. She might want some of that!! "Of course I will, lets dirt dive something we can both enjoy." "Great" he said, "let me go drop off this Tandem Rig in the Gear Room and get my rig out". When he came out she was making out in the corner with.... He gets his gear and goes over to Paula. "What should we do?" Which completely interrupts her make out session with the New jumpmaster who came into town last week. She had been trying to tongue lock him all week, She turns to the jumper and says "Oh, your ready to dirt dive now?" My handle thingies kept falling out so I used some of these wire things that keep bread bags closed to keep them nice and tight. The velcro didn't seem like enough. I wanna know how fast I'm falling and I couldn't afford one of those dytter things, so I brought a radar gun from my patrol car. I'm gonna point it at the ground after we finish the four point thing four times, OK? She looks at him dumbfounded and says look DUDE you ain't written me no ticket for that....or else I'll not show you that head down thingy.....and I do that really well!! Having heard a pretty girl say both "head" and "down" in the same breath, the student begins to drool. She looks at the drooling guy she just thought was cute with a new light, he's now incredible sexy with one of the biggest buldges she has ever seen. The New Jump Master will just have to wait. Everyone knows you don't loose at a Dropzone anyway, you just loose your place in line. "Come on baby, let's launch a Horny Gorilla. Will this be your First Horny Gorilla?" He smiles and blushes and knows better than to admit to a first. "No, it's my pre-second." "Take off your shirt" she says. "Why?" "Because I said so." He peels off the shirt exposing a rippling chest that would make any woman cringe. She can't wait to get him in a door jam with that naked chest up against hers. As they walk to the Mock up, she checks out his fine ass and wants to BOOM!...Push it right out of the otter! So...she does...and there they are...close as ever...when all of a sudden, they go through a poofy cloud and she notices a guy in an all black suit and rig swooping in. As he gets closer, she sees the monogram on his mud flap - F.A.A.??? Oh shit! She turns and tracks like her life depends on it. No way she's landing at the DZ now. Not with all that stuff they have in the video room. She looks around for an out and decides to hum it down and land off. She wishes she had her cell phone so she could warn someone. Yes, he's an asshole and a DZ slut, but she doesn't want him to go to jail. If they would have just stayed home and did the nasty last night instead of going to his place and looking through the jars containing his belly button lint collection. She went home to tune her bagpipes before the festival. She drank too much Southern Comfort and played a mean version of Janis Joplins "Take Another Little Piece of My Heart". I did not quite sound right on bag pipes but it reminded her of the times back in the late 60's when she was abducted from her crib by big-headed aliens with grayish white skin, small mouths, and black, almond-shaped eyes. After numerous rectal probes, she was dropped off unceremoniously back in her crib. Naturally, she didn't remember any of this, but the Southern comfort and the bagpipes triggered the suppressed memory. It also brought back memories of the first time she took some acid. She was in Yosemite Park and tripped for hours while looking at the different formations in the rocks. She thought she saw an entrance to heaven and gradually moved closer to it. She walked in and picked up this interesting substance on the ground. Then she walked back outside and stared into the sky. The sky had never been so beautiful and clear. That made her think about wanting to try to fly, and that's when she drove to the only drop zone around. She told them she just HAD to fly that day, so they applied a little cream to that rash so that her legstraps wouldn't chafe and showed her the way to the gear room. Her rig was hanging next to the tandem-student harness and that brought back memories of The night she spent at Billvon's house. So many harnesses....so little time, and such a huge brain!!! She picked up her rig and walked towards the beer cooler to say hello to me, Nathan. I was the official beer pourer that night. I also had my dictionary so I could translate Bill Von to others like me. I gave her a beer and asked to lay down in the soft savannah but she said "I'm saving myself for Sangiro. We're gonna get married so he can stay in California where the weather is nice and we can jump and ride motorcycles all year round." Nathan was devastated. He picked up the phone and called the DZ since his therapist was out of town. They caught on to his depression when asked about jumping without a rig....So he decided to take up BASE instead....He hung from the DZ and walked towards The Casa. "Get out" he said to the pilot. "Now". The pilot was a veteran of the gulf war, and no coward, but he had never seen such an expression on a human face before. "Wait" said Nathan "Start it up first and point it down the runway. Then get out." The pilot obeyed, and Nathan began taxiing the big airplane down the ramp Until he saw a bunch of DZ.comers chasing after him in go-carts. Frozen in fear, her forgot one tiny detail, the plane! As the speed increased and the gear started rising from the ground, a huge pair of boobies appeared before Nathan and the entire group of DZ.commer's eyes. They were gigantic! The guys were all awestruck. Clay reached out to touch one and as he did one of his fingers reached out to tweak a nipple, but his sharp fingernails pierced the flesh of the enormous boobie. Thus punctured, all the air in the enormous bazooms suddenly began rushing out, and when it did, the female-shaped balloon they were attached to began hissing madly as it flopped this way and that all over the freakin' sky like some kind of crazy Wile E. Coyote bonanza! Holding onto the tether, he was cartwheeled to and fro like Indiana Jones on a bad hair day. Gradually, the female-shaped balloon ran out of gas, and as he slowly descended, he lightly touched down, the flaccid remants of immense mamaries collapsing all around him. When he finally struggled out from under the gas-mams, he found himself in his own bedroom tangled in his silk sheets. Thank God that was just a really bad dream. He was sweating and breathing heavy when he heard a knock on the door. Wondering who it could be at this hour, he opened the door, forgetting he was completely naked and saw a pair of wryly smiling female Jehovah's Witnesses. He invited them in, pausing to put on his silk boxers with the pic of Yosemite Sam, and then sat down on the couch with a scotch/rocks in one hand and the shapely thigh of the brunette JW in the other. He pressed the play button on his VCR. He was expecting to see the porn video he had left in the previous morning, but was surprised to see Willing to Fly? Someone has definately been in his apartment. But the ladies thought it was so sensative of him to be watching a video with so much poetry and beauty and started snuggling up to him. He dimmed the lights and started kissing the blonde. The brunette jumped and, apparently jelouse said "You can't kiss my girlfriend like that." He was shocked but very excited. His next move would be to get out his Kathy Kuffs and the squeezy-bear honey bottle from the cabinet. The girls told him that they would be tormented for their sins and he said "let me count the ways". Normally a tidy man, on the floor he noticed his velcro gloves. He started daydreaming about his sheep and poodles and decided that his heart is with them. He asked the ladies to leave and he grabbed his gloves, got in his jeep and there sat his favorite sheepy friend, listening to the radio and pawing anxiously at the floorboard. He started singing with the radio "Only Ewe...." and threw his gearbag into the back, hoping he had his video camera in there because when he watches himself with the poodles and shhep afterwords it turns him on even more. Especially this one tape where one of the poodles was dressed as Little Bo-Peep. That only got him thinking of how confusing the story had been to him as a child. "...has lost her sheep and doesn't know where to find them" Duh! The definition of lost. "...leave them alone and they'll come home" If they're lost, you have to. "...wagging their tails behind them" Oooohhhh, the exciting part. The poodle dressed as LBP had that haughty, pensive look and it reminded him of they way his ex-g/f had looked so beautiful and pensive and he thought he was in love. Then he ended up on a Jerry Springer Show where his girlfriend came out and told him she was actually a he. But he was fortunate though. Because before leaving the show he met another guest that had problems with nymphomania and palsy. She wasn't really a nympho, but everytime she put her hand in someone's lap, they got so turned on that she ended up in some midget dungeon hold a space-toy, a whip, and telling them the story about when Bill Von was last there. Appearently he is really into S&M and whips and leather and chains. She said she did not understand him though because he used big words such as jumentious. She really likes intelligent men. That is why she replaced her poster of Brad Pitt with one of the Supreme Court justices in garters. It may have been photoshopped, but it aroused her when she thought of their Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites diverds 0 #72 September 27, 2002 ...hard long wood (gavels) pounding on the courtroom desktops. She reached into her bedside drawer and pulled out a half smoked cigar she got from... Skydive Radio Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Jumperpaula 0 #73 September 27, 2002 Quote...and pulled out a half smoked cigar she got from... ..the guy she had the night before. He was sexy and was rough- the way she liked it . But his girlfriend barged in on them and said... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites nws01 0 #74 September 28, 2002 Surfs Up BIOTCH! BacK the Fuck Up! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites diverds 0 #75 September 28, 2002 She bucked the sweaty pig off her back and pummeled the advancing woman in the face with a... Skydive Radio Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Prev 1 2 3 4 Next Page 3 of 4 Join the conversation You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account. Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible. Reply to this topic... × Pasted as rich text. Paste as plain text instead Only 75 emoji are allowed. × Your link has been automatically embedded. Display as a link instead × Your previous content has been restored. Clear editor × You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL. Insert image from URL × Desktop Tablet Phone Submit Reply 0
happythoughts 0 #58 September 27, 2002 ... a pair of wryly smiling female Jehovah's Witnesses. He invited them in, pausing to put on his silk boxers with the pic of Yosemite Sam, and then sat down on the couch with a scotch/rocks in one hand and the shapely thigh of the brunette JW in the other. He pressed the play button on his VCR. He was expecting to see the porn video he had left in the previous morning, but was surprised to see... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Slappie 9 #59 September 27, 2002 but was surprised to see... A three piece band of leper bovines belting out "God Save the Queen" in g minor. Shaking his head trying to remove the thoughts of lust he felt for the bassoon playing bovine. He remembered the two women he had invited into his house. They were standing in total shock an amazment staring at him when..... "Find out just what any people will quietly submit to and you have found out the exact measure of injustice and wrong which will be imposed upon them." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Jumperpaula 0 #60 September 27, 2002 Quote, but was surprised to see... ...Willing to Fly? Someone has definately been in his apartment. But the ladies thought it was so sensative of him to be watching a video with so much poetry and beauty and started snuggling up to him. He dimmed the lights and started kissing the blonde. The brunette jumped and, apparently jelouse said "You can't kiss my girlfriend like that." He was shocked but very excited. His next move would be... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Slappie 9 #61 September 27, 2002 CUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Paula I think my cow story line fits Clay better then him actaully getting 2 lesbian women in his place... ROLLUM!!!!!!!!! "Find out just what any people will quietly submit to and you have found out the exact measure of injustice and wrong which will be imposed upon them." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #62 September 27, 2002 He was shocked but very excited. His next move would be to get out his Kathy Kuffs and the squeezy-bear honey bottle from the cabinet. The girls told him that they would be tormented for their sins and he said "let me count the ways". Normally a tidy man, on the floor he noticed... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
nws01 0 #63 September 27, 2002 he noticed... his velcro gloves. He started daydreaming about his sheep and poodles and decided that his heart is with them. He asked the ladies to leave and he grabbed his gloves, got in his jeep and... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #64 September 27, 2002 ...got in his jeep and there sat his favorite sheepy friend, listening to the radio and pawing anxiously at the floorboard. He started singing with the radio "Only Ewe...." and threw his gearbag into the back, hoping he had his... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
nws01 0 #65 September 27, 2002 hoping he had his video camera in there because when he watches himself with the poodles and shhep afterwords it turns him on even more. Especially this one tape where... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #66 September 27, 2002 ...one of the poodles was dressed as Little Bo-Peep. That only got him thinking of how confusing the story had been to him as a child. "...has lost her sheep and doesn't know where to find them" Duh! The definition of lost. "...leave them alone and they'll come home" If they're lost, you have to. "...wagging their tails behind them" Oooohhhh, the exciting part. The poodle dressed as LBP had that haughty, pensive look and it reminded him of they way his ex-g/f had... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
nws01 0 #67 September 27, 2002 it reminded him of they way his ex-g/f had looked so beautiful and pensive and he thought he was in love. Then he ended up on a Jerry Springer Show where his girlfriend came out and told him she was actually a he. But he was fortunate though. Because before leaving the show he met another guest that had problems with... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #68 September 27, 2002 had problems with nymphomania and palsy. She wasn't really a nympho, but everytime she put her hand in someone's lap, they got so turned on that she ended up in some midget dungeon hold a space-toy, a whip, and telling them... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
nws01 0 #69 September 27, 2002 and telling them... the story about when Bill Von was last there. Appearently he is really into S&M and whips and leather and chains. She said she did not understand him though because he used big words such as... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #70 September 27, 2002 because he used big words such as jumentious. She really likes intelligent men. That is why she replaced her poster of Brad Pitt with one of the Supreme Court justices in garters. It may have been photoshopped, but it aroused her when she thought of their... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
nws01 0 #71 September 27, 2002 Story to date.......... It was hot out today. I walked into the packing tent. It was as sticky and humid as Brad Pitt's pits. There she was, trying a little too hard to bend over as she was tying the stow bands. Her quick small fingers made work of the lines. Her shiny pin necklace dangled from her neck. "Mmmmmm, those thighs," I thought to myself. Was she showing him the way? Was she holding back? Was he holding back? Fear is the mind killer. A skydive might help to clear her head. If only she could find someone to jump with and get that weird guy to quit stalking her. She walked away as he was talking to her, which really pissed him off. That's when he turned to side. His interesting bulges reminded her of the old bass fisherman's saying "throw the little ones back and mount the big ones". She never forgot the summer that she worked on a fishing boat as a baiter. It didn't take her long to make an impression on all the seamen. Under the tutelage of the ships Master Baiter, she had quickly learned the ropes were good to hang onto while the Seaman banged her from behind. Every night they would take turns gang banging until the boat assignment was over and she went to Texas where she took up Skydiving. She wondered if he was in the van getting another blowjob. She wondered if the seatbelt had crammed up his ass, like it used to do with her. She wondered how a Tandem Master like him could manage a blow job from every Tandem chick that came through the dropzone. Just then Bill walked up and asked...."Dude, what are you doing? Do you have time to give me a blow job?" She grabbed his testicles and squeezed them as Bill fell to the ground in pain. She said, what the hell is an oscilloscope?? I was going to give you a bj too before you asked such a stupid question now I'm just gonna try to get on a Load and make a skydive. She wandered around the DZ seeing who was there and what was going on. All she saw was a 4 way practicing on creepers, a couple of freeflyers gearing up in a hurry, Tandem students hanging around watching the sky. Finally , she decided she would grab one of the people just off student status and do a free coached jump. She introduced herself to this guystanding by himself next to the soda machine and said, “wanna learn to fly head down?” "But I'm just off student status! Is this the norm?" To which she replied "It's cool, your cleared to fun jump, unless you don't want to." He thought about it. He had seen the video's of the Flyboyz and he thought it was really cool, but never thought he'd be trying it right off Student Status. She was so pretty, and so sweet to ask him to jump and he didn't want to say no. After some serious thought, he said He looks at her with the tandem rig and said, "Thanks, but I don't think Im ready for head down yet. I wanna get some more experience on my belly first. At least 50 jumps or so. Do you still want to jump with me?" She looked at his humble face beaming at her, now she was the one who didn't want to say no. He was kinda cute. She might want some of that!! "Of course I will, lets dirt dive something we can both enjoy." "Great" he said, "let me go drop off this Tandem Rig in the Gear Room and get my rig out". When he came out she was making out in the corner with.... He gets his gear and goes over to Paula. "What should we do?" Which completely interrupts her make out session with the New jumpmaster who came into town last week. She had been trying to tongue lock him all week, She turns to the jumper and says "Oh, your ready to dirt dive now?" My handle thingies kept falling out so I used some of these wire things that keep bread bags closed to keep them nice and tight. The velcro didn't seem like enough. I wanna know how fast I'm falling and I couldn't afford one of those dytter things, so I brought a radar gun from my patrol car. I'm gonna point it at the ground after we finish the four point thing four times, OK? She looks at him dumbfounded and says look DUDE you ain't written me no ticket for that....or else I'll not show you that head down thingy.....and I do that really well!! Having heard a pretty girl say both "head" and "down" in the same breath, the student begins to drool. She looks at the drooling guy she just thought was cute with a new light, he's now incredible sexy with one of the biggest buldges she has ever seen. The New Jump Master will just have to wait. Everyone knows you don't loose at a Dropzone anyway, you just loose your place in line. "Come on baby, let's launch a Horny Gorilla. Will this be your First Horny Gorilla?" He smiles and blushes and knows better than to admit to a first. "No, it's my pre-second." "Take off your shirt" she says. "Why?" "Because I said so." He peels off the shirt exposing a rippling chest that would make any woman cringe. She can't wait to get him in a door jam with that naked chest up against hers. As they walk to the Mock up, she checks out his fine ass and wants to BOOM!...Push it right out of the otter! So...she does...and there they are...close as ever...when all of a sudden, they go through a poofy cloud and she notices a guy in an all black suit and rig swooping in. As he gets closer, she sees the monogram on his mud flap - F.A.A.??? Oh shit! She turns and tracks like her life depends on it. No way she's landing at the DZ now. Not with all that stuff they have in the video room. She looks around for an out and decides to hum it down and land off. She wishes she had her cell phone so she could warn someone. Yes, he's an asshole and a DZ slut, but she doesn't want him to go to jail. If they would have just stayed home and did the nasty last night instead of going to his place and looking through the jars containing his belly button lint collection. She went home to tune her bagpipes before the festival. She drank too much Southern Comfort and played a mean version of Janis Joplins "Take Another Little Piece of My Heart". I did not quite sound right on bag pipes but it reminded her of the times back in the late 60's when she was abducted from her crib by big-headed aliens with grayish white skin, small mouths, and black, almond-shaped eyes. After numerous rectal probes, she was dropped off unceremoniously back in her crib. Naturally, she didn't remember any of this, but the Southern comfort and the bagpipes triggered the suppressed memory. It also brought back memories of the first time she took some acid. She was in Yosemite Park and tripped for hours while looking at the different formations in the rocks. She thought she saw an entrance to heaven and gradually moved closer to it. She walked in and picked up this interesting substance on the ground. Then she walked back outside and stared into the sky. The sky had never been so beautiful and clear. That made her think about wanting to try to fly, and that's when she drove to the only drop zone around. She told them she just HAD to fly that day, so they applied a little cream to that rash so that her legstraps wouldn't chafe and showed her the way to the gear room. Her rig was hanging next to the tandem-student harness and that brought back memories of The night she spent at Billvon's house. So many harnesses....so little time, and such a huge brain!!! She picked up her rig and walked towards the beer cooler to say hello to me, Nathan. I was the official beer pourer that night. I also had my dictionary so I could translate Bill Von to others like me. I gave her a beer and asked to lay down in the soft savannah but she said "I'm saving myself for Sangiro. We're gonna get married so he can stay in California where the weather is nice and we can jump and ride motorcycles all year round." Nathan was devastated. He picked up the phone and called the DZ since his therapist was out of town. They caught on to his depression when asked about jumping without a rig....So he decided to take up BASE instead....He hung from the DZ and walked towards The Casa. "Get out" he said to the pilot. "Now". The pilot was a veteran of the gulf war, and no coward, but he had never seen such an expression on a human face before. "Wait" said Nathan "Start it up first and point it down the runway. Then get out." The pilot obeyed, and Nathan began taxiing the big airplane down the ramp Until he saw a bunch of DZ.comers chasing after him in go-carts. Frozen in fear, her forgot one tiny detail, the plane! As the speed increased and the gear started rising from the ground, a huge pair of boobies appeared before Nathan and the entire group of DZ.commer's eyes. They were gigantic! The guys were all awestruck. Clay reached out to touch one and as he did one of his fingers reached out to tweak a nipple, but his sharp fingernails pierced the flesh of the enormous boobie. Thus punctured, all the air in the enormous bazooms suddenly began rushing out, and when it did, the female-shaped balloon they were attached to began hissing madly as it flopped this way and that all over the freakin' sky like some kind of crazy Wile E. Coyote bonanza! Holding onto the tether, he was cartwheeled to and fro like Indiana Jones on a bad hair day. Gradually, the female-shaped balloon ran out of gas, and as he slowly descended, he lightly touched down, the flaccid remants of immense mamaries collapsing all around him. When he finally struggled out from under the gas-mams, he found himself in his own bedroom tangled in his silk sheets. Thank God that was just a really bad dream. He was sweating and breathing heavy when he heard a knock on the door. Wondering who it could be at this hour, he opened the door, forgetting he was completely naked and saw a pair of wryly smiling female Jehovah's Witnesses. He invited them in, pausing to put on his silk boxers with the pic of Yosemite Sam, and then sat down on the couch with a scotch/rocks in one hand and the shapely thigh of the brunette JW in the other. He pressed the play button on his VCR. He was expecting to see the porn video he had left in the previous morning, but was surprised to see Willing to Fly? Someone has definately been in his apartment. But the ladies thought it was so sensative of him to be watching a video with so much poetry and beauty and started snuggling up to him. He dimmed the lights and started kissing the blonde. The brunette jumped and, apparently jelouse said "You can't kiss my girlfriend like that." He was shocked but very excited. His next move would be to get out his Kathy Kuffs and the squeezy-bear honey bottle from the cabinet. The girls told him that they would be tormented for their sins and he said "let me count the ways". Normally a tidy man, on the floor he noticed his velcro gloves. He started daydreaming about his sheep and poodles and decided that his heart is with them. He asked the ladies to leave and he grabbed his gloves, got in his jeep and there sat his favorite sheepy friend, listening to the radio and pawing anxiously at the floorboard. He started singing with the radio "Only Ewe...." and threw his gearbag into the back, hoping he had his video camera in there because when he watches himself with the poodles and shhep afterwords it turns him on even more. Especially this one tape where one of the poodles was dressed as Little Bo-Peep. That only got him thinking of how confusing the story had been to him as a child. "...has lost her sheep and doesn't know where to find them" Duh! The definition of lost. "...leave them alone and they'll come home" If they're lost, you have to. "...wagging their tails behind them" Oooohhhh, the exciting part. The poodle dressed as LBP had that haughty, pensive look and it reminded him of they way his ex-g/f had looked so beautiful and pensive and he thought he was in love. Then he ended up on a Jerry Springer Show where his girlfriend came out and told him she was actually a he. But he was fortunate though. Because before leaving the show he met another guest that had problems with nymphomania and palsy. She wasn't really a nympho, but everytime she put her hand in someone's lap, they got so turned on that she ended up in some midget dungeon hold a space-toy, a whip, and telling them the story about when Bill Von was last there. Appearently he is really into S&M and whips and leather and chains. She said she did not understand him though because he used big words such as jumentious. She really likes intelligent men. That is why she replaced her poster of Brad Pitt with one of the Supreme Court justices in garters. It may have been photoshopped, but it aroused her when she thought of their Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
diverds 0 #72 September 27, 2002 ...hard long wood (gavels) pounding on the courtroom desktops. She reached into her bedside drawer and pulled out a half smoked cigar she got from... Skydive Radio Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Jumperpaula 0 #73 September 27, 2002 Quote...and pulled out a half smoked cigar she got from... ..the guy she had the night before. He was sexy and was rough- the way she liked it . But his girlfriend barged in on them and said... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
nws01 0 #74 September 28, 2002 Surfs Up BIOTCH! BacK the Fuck Up! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
diverds 0 #75 September 28, 2002 She bucked the sweaty pig off her back and pummeled the advancing woman in the face with a... Skydive Radio Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
