bad day?

[fool 0]

not sure if this has been put up here before or not, but in case it hasn't a friend of mine emailed this to me a while ago, and I thought it was funny.


> >Subject: U think u are having a bad day..........
> >Taken from a Florida Newspaper.
> >
> >
> >
> > A man was working on his motorcycle on his patio
> >and his wife was in the kitchen. The man was
> >racing the engine on the motorcycle when it accidentally
> >slipped into gear. The man, still holding the handlebars,
> >was dragged through the glass patio doors and along with the
> >motorcycle dumped onto the floor inside the house.
> >
> > The wife, hearing the crash, ran into the dining room
> >and found her husband lying on the floor, cut and
> >bleeding, the motorcycle lying next to him and the
> >shattered patio door. The wife ran to the phone and
> >summoned the ambulance. Because they lived on a fairly
> >large hill, the wife went down the several flights of
> >stairs to the street to escort the paramedics to her
> >husband.
> >
> > After the ambulance arrived and transported the man to
> >the hospital, the wife righted the motorcycle and
> >pushed it outside. Since gas had spilled on the
> >floor, the wife got some paper towels, blotted up the
> >gasoline and threw the towels in the toilet.
> >
> > The man was treated and released to come home. On
> >arrival, he looked at the shattered patio door and the
> >damage done to his motorcycle. He became despondent,
> >went to the bathroom, sat down on the toilet and
> >smoked a cigarette. After finishing the cigarette, he
> >flipped it between his legs into the toilet bowl while
> >seated. The wife, who was in the kitchen, heard the
> >loud explosion and her husband
> >screaming. She ran into the bathroom and found her
> >husband lying on the floor. His trousers had been
> >blown away and he was suffering burns on the buttocks,
> >the back of his legs and his groin.
> >
> > The wife again ran to the phone to call the ambulance.
> >The very same paramedics were dispatched and the wife
> >met them at the street. The paramedics loaded the
> >husband on the stretcher and began carrying him to the
> >street. While going down the stairs to the street
> >accompanied by the wife, one of the paramedics asked
> >the wife how the husband had burned himself. She told
> >them and the paramedics started laughing so hard, one
> >of them slipped and tipped the stretcher, dumping the
> >husband out. He fell down the remaining stairs and
> >broke his arm.
> >
> > > > > >
> >Feeling better yet?
> >
> > > > > >
> > The average cost for rehabilitating a seal after the
> >Exxon Valdez oil spill in Alaska was $80,000. At a
> >special ceremony, two of the most expensively saved
> >animals were released back into the wild amid cheers
> >and applause from onlookers. A minute later, in full
> >view, a killer whale ate them both.
> >
> > > > > >
> >Still not there yet?
> >
> > > > > >
> > A woman came home to find her husband in the kitchen,
> >shaking frantically with what looked like a wire
> >running from his waist towards the electric kettle.
> >Intending to jolt him away from the deadly current she
> >whacked him with a handy plank of wood by the back
> >door, breaking his arm in two places. Until that
> >moment he had been happily listening to his Walkman.
> >
> > > > > >
> >Maybe this will do it!
> >
> > > > > >
> > Two animal rights protesters were protesting at the
> >cruelty of sending pigs to the slaughter-house in
> >Bonn, Germany. Suddenly, the pigs, all two thousand
> >of them, escaped through a broken fence and stampeded,
> >trampling the two hapless protesters to death.
> >
> > > > > >
> >If after this one you don't feel better then I give up!
> >
> > > > > >
> > An Iraqi terrorist, Khay Rahnajet, didn't pay enough
> >postage on a letter bomb. It came back with "Return
> >to Sender" stamped on it. Forgetting it was the bomb;
> >he opened it and was blown to bits.
> >
> > > > > >
> >Your day's not so bad, now is it?
>

S.E.X. party #1

"Life's journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally worn out, shouting "f*#k, what a ride".

[Lolie 0]

Is there an echo in here??

(This was posted about four hours ago... and I haven't read it yet, 'cause it's too long. )

-Miranda
you shall above all things be glad and young / For if you're young,whatever life you wear
it will become you;and if you are glad / whatever's living will yourself become.

[fool 0]

hehehe, sorry for the repost then. I've had it sitting inmy inbox for about two months, meaning to post it, finally, bored enough at work that I remembered to.

S.E.X. party #1

"Life's journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally worn out, shouting "f*#k, what a ride".