"the Plan"

[bodypilot90 0]

"The PLAN"

I see a lot of people on the television yelling for
peace, but I have not heard of one plan for peace.
"Books, not Bombs" won't work. The head mullahs won't
let anyone read them. If they do, they poke their eyes
out.

Here's the plan:

1) The US will apologize to the world for our
"interference" in their affairs, past & present. You
know, Hitler, Mussolini,Tojo, Marshal Petain and the
rest of them good old boys. We will never "interfere"
again.


2) We will withdraw our troops from all over the
world, starting with Germany, France, South Korea and
the Philippines. They don't want us there. We would
station troops at our borders. No more sneaking
through holes in the fence.


3) All illegal aliens have 90 days to get their
affairs together and leave. We'll give them a free
trip home. After 90 days the remainder will be
gathered up and deported immediately, regardless of
who or where they are. France would welcome them.


4) All future visitors will be thoroughly checked and
limited to 90 days in America unless given a special
permit. No one from a terrorist nation would be
allowed in. If you don't like it there, change it
yourself, don't hide here Asylum would not ever be
available to anyone. We don't need any more cab
drivers.


5) No "students" over age 21. The older ones are the
bombers. If they don't attend classes, they get a "F"
and it's back home, baby.


6) The US will make a strong effort to become self
sufficient energy wise. This will include developing
non polluting sources of energy but will require a
temporary drilling for oil in the Alaskan wilderness.
The caribou will have to cope for a while.



7) Offer Saudi Arabia and other oil producing
countries $10 a barrel for their oil. If they don't
like it, we go someplace else.


8) If there is a famine or other natural catastrophe
in the world, we will not "interfere". They can pray
to Allah or whomever, for seeds, rain, cement or
whatever they need. Besides, most of what we give them
is stolen or given to the army. The people who need it
most get very little, if any, anyway.


9) Ship the UN Headquarters to an island some place.
We don't need the spies and fair weather friends here.
Besides, it would make a good homeless shelter or
lockup for illegal aliens.


10) All Americans must go to charm and beauty school.
That way, no one can call us "Ugly Americans" any
longer.


Now, ain't that a winner of a plan?

[billvon 3,118]

I think you might like this recent move by the administration:
(Note - this is from the onion, a publication not known for its seriousness.)


-----------------------------

WASHINGTON, DC—Frustrated with the United Nations' "consistent, blatant regard for the will of its 188 member nations," the U.S. announced Monday the formation of its own international governing body, the U.S.U.N.

"The U.N. has repeatedly demonstrated an inability to act decisively in carrying out actions the U.S. government deems necessary," U.S.U.N. Secretary General Colin Powell said. "Every time we tried to get something accomplished, it inevitably got bogged down in procedural policies, bureaucratic formalities, and Security Council votes."

"I predict the U.S.U.N. will be extremely influential in world politics in the coming decades," Powell continued. "In fact, you can count on it."

The new organization will be based in Houston, where a $400 million U.S.U.N. Building is currently under construction. The U.S.U.N. Charter, ratified unanimously by delegates in a four-minute vote Monday, sets forth the mission of the organization as "the proliferation of peace and international economic, social, and humanitarian progress through deference to the U.S."

"The U.S.U.N. resembles the original in almost every way, right down to all the flags outside our headquarters," said Condoleezza Rice, a U.S. delegate to the U.S.U.N. "This organization will carry out peacekeeping missions all over the world, but, unlike the U.N., these missions will not be compromised by the threat of opposition by lesser nations."

In its first act, the U.S.U.N. Security Council unanimously backed a resolution to liberate Iraq's people and natural resources from the rule of Saddam Hussein.

"We gave the old U.N. a go for I don't know how many years, but it just wasn't working," said Dick Cheney, a U.S. delegate to the U.S.U.N. "Really, I have no idea what we were doing sacrificing all that power and autonomy in exchange for a couple of lousy troops from New Zealand."

Added Cheney: "I can't tell you how much easier it is to achieve consensus when you don't have to worry about dissent."

Cheney, along with Rice, Donald Rumsfeld, Tom Ridge, and George W. Bush, make up the five permanent members of the 15-person U.S.U.N. Security Council.

"The five Security Council members have veto power to block U.S.U.N. resolutions for military action," Rumsfeld said. "Not that anyone would, but it's nice to have, nonetheless."

According to Powell, in spite of the fact that delegates hail from every corner of the U.S., General Assembly meetings have been refreshingly free of rancor.

"We've got Bill Frist from Tennessee, Tom DeLay from Texas, and Dennis Hastert from way up in Illinois," U.S.U.N. delegate Rick Santorum said. "Despite the diverse backgrounds of the delegates, cooperation has not been a problem—unlike at some outmoded, gridlocked international peacekeeping bodies I could name."

The official U.S.U.N. language is English. The official religion is Christianity.

(Courtesy of the onion.)

[rgoper 0]

Quote

Cheney, along with Rice, Donald Rumsfeld, Tom Ridge, and George W. Bush, make up the five permanent members of the 15-person U.S.U.N. Security Council.

i've kept real quite the last few days. but i've been aware of this situation. this would be like "letting the fox gaurd the chickenhouse" how long will it be, before WE are the next nation living in opression? Wyatt Earp & Doc Holliday just don't know when to stop, but i believe they won't be such good friends much longer, seems ol' Wyatt want's to be iraq's new sherriff, and mayor, ol' Doc don't care for this much. i'm keeping an eyeball peeled on em'

--Richard--
"We Will Not Be Shaken By Thugs, And Terroist"

[boudy 0]

Perhaps that explains the resignation of Rumsfeld advisor, Richard Perle, one of the architects of our new pre-emptive war doctrine and a long time advocate of a US overthrow of the Iraq regime(also known as the "prince of darkness" in the Reagan administration for his staunch opposition to nuclear weapons agreements with soviets). Perle would make great USUN Secretary General.

http://www.boston.com/dailynews/086/wash/Former_Pentagon_official_Richa%3A.shtml