EricTheRed 0 #1 July 8, 2003 I was happy. My girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year, and so we decided to get married. My parents helped us in every way, my friends encouraged me. And my girlfriend? She was a dream! There was only one thing bothering me, very much indeed. That one thing was her younger sister. My prospective sister-in-law was twenty years of age, wore tight miniskirts, and low cut blouses. She would regularly bend down when near me and I got many a pleasant view of her underwear. It had to be deliberate. She never did it when she was near anyone else. One day little sister called and asked me to come over to check the wedding invitations. She was alone when I arrived. She whispered to me that soon I was to be married, and she had feelings and desires for me that she couldn't overcome and didn't really want to overcome. She told me that she wanted to make love to me just once before I got married and committed my life to her sister. I was in total shock and couldn't say a word. She said, "I'm going upstairs to my bedroom, and if you want to go ahead with it just come up and get me. "I was stunned. I was frozen in shock as I watched her go up the stairs. When she reached the top she pulled down her panties and threw them down the stairs at me. I stood there for a moment, then turned and went straight to the front door. I opened the door and stepped out of the house and walked straight towards my car. My future father-in-law was standing outside. With tears in his eyes he hugged me and said, "We are very happy that you have passed our little test. We couldn't ask for a better man for our daughter. Welcome to the family. The moral of this story is: "Always keep your condoms in your car."illegible usually Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #2 July 8, 2003 An old farmer had owned a large farm for several years, with a large pond in the back. One evening, the old farmer decided to go down to the pond, as he hadn't been there for a while. As he neared the pond, he heard shouting and laughing. He saw a group of young women skinny-dipping in his pond. When they noticed him, they all went to the deep end of the pond. One of the women shouted to him, "We're not coming out until you leave!" The old man replied, "I didn't come down here to watch you ladies swim or make you get out of the pond naked. I only came to feed the alligator." The moral of the story? Old age and treachery will always triumph over youth and skill. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
CrazyIvan 0 #3 July 8, 2003 A-hem A-hem http://www.dropzone.com/cgi-bin/forum/gforum.cgi?post=488198#488198__________________________________________ Blue Skies and May the Force be with you. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
groovychic 0 #4 July 8, 2003 thanks for the giggle...I had heard the first one, but in a different fashion. The second was quite cute! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Push 0 #5 July 8, 2003 Oh come on, May 19th? Some of us don't have memories that long. Now, what was I going to say? Damn, I forgot. -- Toggle Whippin' Yahoo Skydiving is easy. All you have to do is relax while plummetting at 120 mph from 10,000' with nothing but some nylon and webbing to save you. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
hookitt 1 #6 July 8, 2003 Do you log every thing? May 19, 2003, 8:55 AM I'm impressed. I, however, yet again, have not read the funny posted above until today. Though I didn't find it humorous, I do find it humorous that you are able to point out every reposted thread known to dz.com kind. In fact I've probably missed several of the your repost notifications. I'll try harder to keep up in the future Thanks again TimMy grammar sometimes resembles that of magnetic refrigerator poetry... Ghetto Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
CrazyIvan 0 #7 July 8, 2003 You're welcome. __________________________________________ Blue Skies and May the Force be with you. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kris 0 #8 July 8, 2003 Sky, Muff Bro, Rodriguez Bro, and Bastion of Purity and Innocence!™ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
geanky 0 #9 July 8, 2003 Sheila comes home early from work one day and finds her husband, Mark, in bed with a woman. Sheila says, "That's it, I'm leaving and never coming back." Mark says, "Don't you at least want to hear my explanation?" Sheila shrugs and says, "Fine, let's hear your story." Mark explains, "I'm driving along the street when I see this young lady in torn clothes, no shoes, all muddy and crying. I took pity on her and asked if she would like to get cleaned up in my house. She climbed into my truck and I brought her home. She took a shower, I gave her the underwear that doesn't fit you anymore, the blouse I bought you two years ago that you never wore, the $150 Nike running shoes you bought but never used -- I even gave her some of the roast beef you had in the fridge, but didn't serve to me. I showed her to the door. She thanked me profusely. As she was about to leave she turned around and asked me, 'Is there anything else your wife doesn't use anymore? learn to fly in 3d Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
moodyskydiver 0 #10 July 8, 2003 A poll was taken randomly from people found walking down the street.Each person was asked what 4 things they would choose if they could have anything in the world. The best answer was from a young college girl. Her answer was "I would choose 4 animals". When asked to explain her answer she replied, "If I could have anything,I'd pick 4 animals...a mink on my back, a jaguar in my garage,a tiger in bed and a jackass to pay for it all." This chick has it figured out! "...just an earthbound misfit, I." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
