Casie 0 #1 August 18, 2003 You don't have to own a cat to appreciate this one... A couple was dressed and ready to go out for the evening. They turned on a night light, turned on the answering machine on the phone line, covered heir pet parakeet and put the cat in the backyard. They phoned the local cab company and requested a taxi. The taxi arrived and the couple opened the front door to leave their house. The cat they had put out into the yard scoots back into the house. They don't want the cat shut in the house because "she" always tries to eat the bird. The wife goes out to the taxi while the husband goes inside to get the cat. The cat runs upstairs, the man in hot pursuit. The wife doesn't want the driver to know the house will be empty. She explains to the taxi driver that her husband will be out soon. "He's just going upstairs to say good-bye to my mother." A few minutes later, the husband gets into the cab. "Sorry I took so long," he says, as they drive away. "Stupid bitch was hiding under the bed. Had to poke her with a coat hanger to get her to come out! Then I had to wrap her in a blanket to keep her from scratching me. But it worked. I hauled her fat ass downstairs and threw her out into the back yard!" The cabdriver hit a parked car...~Porn Kitty WARNING: Goldschlager causes extreme emotional outbursts! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
AggieDave 6 #2 August 18, 2003 hahahahaha! Nice, that's a good one!--"When I die, may I be surrounded by scattered chrome and burning gasoline." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Viking 0 #3 August 18, 2003 LOLOLOLOLOL!!!!!!!I swear you must have footprints on the back of your helmet - chicagoskydiver My God has a bigger dick than your god -George Carlin Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Pablito 0 #4 August 18, 2003 Thanks for the laugh "If you don't overcome your fears they will overcome you first" Shady Monkey/6Segundos Rodriguez/AKA Pablito Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
turtlespeed 226 #5 August 18, 2003 Me Likes!I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
juanesky 0 #6 August 18, 2003 Snow In The Caribbean? A lady goes on vacation alone to the Caribbean wishing her husband had been able to join her. Upon arriving, she meets a black man, and after a night of passionate lovemaking she asks him, "What is your name?" "I can't tell you!" the black man says. Every night they meet and every night she asks him again what his name is and he always responds the same, he cannot tell her. On her last night there she asks again, "Can you please tell me your name?" "I can't because you will make fun of me!" the black man says. "There is no reason for me to laugh at you," the lady says. "Fine, my name is Snow," the black man replies. And the lady bursts into laughter, and the black man gets mad and says, "I knew you would make fun of it," the black man says. The lady replied, "Its my husband that won't believe me when I tell him that I had 10 inches of Snow everyday in the Caribbean!""According to some of the conservatives here, it sounds like it's fine to beat your wide - as long as she had it coming." -Billvon Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Casie 0 #7 August 18, 2003 OMG! Where's SNOWFLAKE when ya need him to make a comment?????~Porn Kitty WARNING: Goldschlager causes extreme emotional outbursts! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Pablito 0 #8 August 18, 2003 Funny funny, thanks again to make the day get better. "If you don't overcome your fears they will overcome you first" Shady Monkey/6Segundos Rodriguez/AKA Pablito Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
turtlespeed 226 #9 August 18, 2003 Guy dies and his wife is reading his will. Says that she put all his money with him in the coffin when he's creamated. Her life long friend was there to console her asks if she's ok...and she says yes and tells her about the will. Her friend says that it WAS his last will and testament, and the woman agrees. So the Funeral day arrives, there was a nice ceremony, and then it came time for the cremation.... So tearfully she lays a shoe box on his chest, and sends him in to be creamated. Just as the flames start licking at the coffin, her friend asks her what she put in the coffin. She told her that she was right and that she had honored her husbands last wishes. Her friend shook her head in dimay...But, But your husband was a Multi Millionaire!!? That surely wouldn't fit in that box Yes, said the woman... I know.... So I wrote him a check.I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Casie 0 #10 August 18, 2003 LOL! Good one!~Porn Kitty WARNING: Goldschlager causes extreme emotional outbursts! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
robskydiv 0 #11 August 18, 2003 That was good Casie. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Casie 0 #12 August 18, 2003 Glad to put a smile on someone's face~Porn Kitty WARNING: Goldschlager causes extreme emotional outbursts! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Casie 0 #13 August 18, 2003 Here's another I just got! Subject: The Rest of the Hussein Family Now that Uday & Qusay have been eliminated, a lot of the lesser-known family are coming to the attention of American authorities. Among the brothers: Sooflay ...........the restauranteur Guday...............the half-Australian brother Huray...............the sports fanatic Sashay..............the gay brother Kuntay & Kintay.....the twins from the African mother Sayhay..............the baseball player Ojay................the stalker/murderer Gulay...............the singer/entertainer Ebay................the internet czar Biliray.............the country music star Ecksray.............the radiologist Puray...............the blender factory owner Regay...............the half-Jamaican brother Tupay...............the one with bad hair Among the sisters: Lattay..............the coffee shop owner Bufay...............the 300 pound sister Dushay..............the clean sister Phayray.............the zoo worker in the gorilla house Sapheway............the grocery store owner Ollay...............the half-mexican sister Gudlay..............the prostitute And Finally: There is Oyvay .......... but the family doesn't like to talk about him much~Porn Kitty WARNING: Goldschlager causes extreme emotional outbursts! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
greenemachine 0 #14 August 18, 2003 those were good for a laugh..If a Blonde throws a pin at you RUN, shes got a hand grenade in her mouth! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
