bmcd308 0 #1 September 5, 2003 Q. What should you do if you see your ex-husband rolling around in pain on the ground? A. Shoot him again. Q. How can you tell when a man is well-hung? A. When you can just barely slip your finger in between his neck and the noose. Q. Why do little boys whine? A. Because they're practicing to be men. Q. How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb? A. One - he just holds it up there and waits for the world to revolve around him. Or, Three - one to screw in the bulb, and two to listen to him brag about the screwing part. Q. What do you call a handcuffed man? A. Trustworthy. Q. What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name? A. You didn't hold the pillow down long enough. Q. Why does it take 100,000,000 sperm to fertilize one egg? A. Because not one!!! will stop and ask directions. Q. Why do female black widow spiders kill their males after mating? A. To stop the snoring before it starts. Q: Why do men whistle when they're sitting on the toilet? A: Because it helps them remember which end they need to wipe. Q: What is the difference between men and women... A: A woman wants one man to satisfy her every need. A man wants every woman to satisfy his one need. Q: How does a man keep his youth? A: By giving her money, furs and diamonds. Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail? A: Rename the mail folder to "instruction manuals" ---------------------------------- www.jumpelvis.com Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
turtlespeed 226 #2 September 5, 2003 I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Blahr 0 #3 September 5, 2003 As a man I must be totally offended. However, I can add one here that I heard and was amused by Q: Why is urine yellow and semen white? A: So men can tell if they are coming or going Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
CrazyIvan 0 #4 September 5, 2003 QuoteQ: Why do men whistle when they're sitting on the toilet? A: Because it helps them remember which end they need to wipe. WOW!!!! That's a great tip!!! __________________________________________ Blue Skies and May the Force be with you. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jlmiracle 7 #5 September 5, 2003 ROFLA Working hard again Brent? I thought Kevin and I were the only slackers. JudyBe kinder than necessary because everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mr2mk1g 10 #6 September 5, 2003 QuoteQuoteQ: Why do men whistle when they're sitting on the toilet? A: Because it helps them remember which end they need to wipe. WOW!!!! That's a great tip!!! COOL - now I'll never confuse my ass from my mouth again Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
juanesky 0 #7 September 5, 2003 QuoteQuoteQuoteQ: Why do men whistle when they're sitting on the toilet? A: Because it helps them remember which end they need to wipe. WOW!!!! That's a great tip!!! Great, Now I wil actually have underwears withouth skid marks....thanks."According to some of the conservatives here, it sounds like it's fine to beat your wide - as long as she had it coming." -Billvon Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites happythoughts 0 #8 September 5, 2003 QuoteThree - one to screw in the bulb, and two to listen to him brag about the screwing part. Nah. Not for a real man. A real man is so good that his g/f brags about how good he is. She says he is so good that all her friends (those tramps) start chasing him. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites happythoughts 0 #9 September 5, 2003 QuoteQ: How does a man keep his youth? A: By giving her money, furs and diamonds. Wrong thread. That would be a woman bashing joke. Personally, I don't believe that women are that superficial that they would date a guy for money, fame, or good looks. A sense of humor is the most important. I've heard that many times. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites turtlespeed 226 #10 September 5, 2003 QuoteQuoteQ: How does a man keep his youth? A: By giving her money, furs and diamonds. Wrong thread. That would be a woman bashing joke. Personally, I don't believe that women are that superficial that they would date a guy for money, fame, or good looks. A sense of humor is the most important. I've heard that many times. Gawd, I hope so...I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Join the conversation You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account. Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible. Reply to this topic... × Pasted as rich text. Paste as plain text instead Only 75 emoji are allowed. × Your link has been automatically embedded. Display as a link instead × Your previous content has been restored. Clear editor × You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL. Insert image from URL × Desktop Tablet Phone Submit Reply 0
happythoughts 0 #8 September 5, 2003 QuoteThree - one to screw in the bulb, and two to listen to him brag about the screwing part. Nah. Not for a real man. A real man is so good that his g/f brags about how good he is. She says he is so good that all her friends (those tramps) start chasing him. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #9 September 5, 2003 QuoteQ: How does a man keep his youth? A: By giving her money, furs and diamonds. Wrong thread. That would be a woman bashing joke. Personally, I don't believe that women are that superficial that they would date a guy for money, fame, or good looks. A sense of humor is the most important. I've heard that many times. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
turtlespeed 226 #10 September 5, 2003 QuoteQuoteQ: How does a man keep his youth? A: By giving her money, furs and diamonds. Wrong thread. That would be a woman bashing joke. Personally, I don't believe that women are that superficial that they would date a guy for money, fame, or good looks. A sense of humor is the most important. I've heard that many times. Gawd, I hope so...I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
