sunnydee123 0 #1 September 18, 2003 ...like you should have been somewhere and just couldn't????? I have been so torn the last few days, after losing Tommy from Badfish. I wanted to be there but with the impeding storm out in the Atlantic, I just didn't think it was the best move - to try and travel....and I continue to battle with that decision. They spread his ashes at the DropZone today (about an hour ago) and I am busted up (again), kicking myself for not being there. What do you do when you feel you should have just been somewhere - no matter the cost? Dreams become reality, one choice at a time... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Casch 0 #2 September 18, 2003 Don't feel bad for not going to the Ash dive. Tommy has a friends love and that is worth so much more. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Canuck278 0 #3 September 18, 2003 I try to realize that i can't be everywhere evrytime i want....we're just people and you can't control everyting in your life. Steve Therapy is expensive, popping bubble wrap is cheap. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites turtlespeed 226 #4 September 18, 2003 As bad as you feel about not being there. There's a phone there. Words and voices and emotions can be felt over the phone as well. Chin Up, Denise...I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites happythoughts 0 #5 September 18, 2003 The purpose of funerals is to help the living cope with the feelings of loss. Get together with some friends and communicate. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites SkydiveNFlorida 0 #6 September 18, 2003 Denise, at this point, there is nothing you can do. You can send a thoughtful card to his family or to Badfish, but you can't be somewhere you already weren't. I did not attend my grandmother's funeral. I didn't know why at the time, I had no real reason. I finally came to the realization that for me, it would make it too 'real'. I never saw her dead, I never saw a coffin, I never saw a tombstone. Maybe i'm still in denial, I know if I went to her grave i'd break down in tears. So, to me, it is like she's not really gone, but just like when I was a kid, and never saw her. Please don't beat yourself up, Denise. You're thinking of him, posting about him, crying over him. It is quite evident that you are hurt, and that you care. Sometimes being there is not the most important thing. Love you! Angela. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites fozchek 0 #7 September 18, 2003 You put on your Badfish shirt, go to the dropzone, and do a jump in it for him this weekend. That would have made him happy, right? *edit to add: As Happythoughts stated, funerals are for the living. Tommy isn't any more present in NY then he is right there with you, Denise. He is everywhere now. His friends know that you are there with them in spirit offering support. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites lawrocket 3 #8 September 18, 2003 I know what you mean. It has happened too many times to me. The best I could do was make the best of what I had and where I was. Reason gets the best of us. In our mind we know it's the right thing. But our hearts are different. The eternal struggle... Best wishes to you, sunny... My wife is hotter than your wife. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Casie 0 #9 September 18, 2003 Don't feel bad girly girl! It's the thoughts you have about Tommy that matter the most. You wanted to be there but it wasn't the best move. It's ok! Cherish the memories you have of Tommy & don't beat yourself up on not being able to go to the ash dive.~Porn Kitty WARNING: Goldschlager causes extreme emotional outbursts! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites sunnydee123 0 #10 September 18, 2003 Thanks everyone - I knew my pals would cheer me up.... Foz has a GREAT idea (although I am normally in my BadFish gear - tons of pics to prove it It was the weirdest thing on Sunday. Last load of the day, sunset, see something out of the corner of my eye once under canopy and it is a FRIGIN BALD EAGLE....just tooling along with me. Every move I made, he copied. I even did a front riser dive and thought I lost him then looked down below my feet and there he was........Then Monday at 8am I got the call about Tommy. Hmmm.... Thanks again gang.....love to all - I'm ok. Dreams become reality, one choice at a time... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Join the conversation You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account. Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible. Reply to this topic... × Pasted as rich text. Paste as plain text instead Only 75 emoji are allowed. × Your link has been automatically embedded. Display as a link instead × Your previous content has been restored. Clear editor × You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL. Insert image from URL × Desktop Tablet Phone Submit Reply 0
Canuck278 0 #3 September 18, 2003 I try to realize that i can't be everywhere evrytime i want....we're just people and you can't control everyting in your life. Steve Therapy is expensive, popping bubble wrap is cheap. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
turtlespeed 226 #4 September 18, 2003 As bad as you feel about not being there. There's a phone there. Words and voices and emotions can be felt over the phone as well. Chin Up, Denise...I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #5 September 18, 2003 The purpose of funerals is to help the living cope with the feelings of loss. Get together with some friends and communicate. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SkydiveNFlorida 0 #6 September 18, 2003 Denise, at this point, there is nothing you can do. You can send a thoughtful card to his family or to Badfish, but you can't be somewhere you already weren't. I did not attend my grandmother's funeral. I didn't know why at the time, I had no real reason. I finally came to the realization that for me, it would make it too 'real'. I never saw her dead, I never saw a coffin, I never saw a tombstone. Maybe i'm still in denial, I know if I went to her grave i'd break down in tears. So, to me, it is like she's not really gone, but just like when I was a kid, and never saw her. Please don't beat yourself up, Denise. You're thinking of him, posting about him, crying over him. It is quite evident that you are hurt, and that you care. Sometimes being there is not the most important thing. Love you! Angela. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
fozchek 0 #7 September 18, 2003 You put on your Badfish shirt, go to the dropzone, and do a jump in it for him this weekend. That would have made him happy, right? *edit to add: As Happythoughts stated, funerals are for the living. Tommy isn't any more present in NY then he is right there with you, Denise. He is everywhere now. His friends know that you are there with them in spirit offering support. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lawrocket 3 #8 September 18, 2003 I know what you mean. It has happened too many times to me. The best I could do was make the best of what I had and where I was. Reason gets the best of us. In our mind we know it's the right thing. But our hearts are different. The eternal struggle... Best wishes to you, sunny... My wife is hotter than your wife. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Casie 0 #9 September 18, 2003 Don't feel bad girly girl! It's the thoughts you have about Tommy that matter the most. You wanted to be there but it wasn't the best move. It's ok! Cherish the memories you have of Tommy & don't beat yourself up on not being able to go to the ash dive.~Porn Kitty WARNING: Goldschlager causes extreme emotional outbursts! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sunnydee123 0 #10 September 18, 2003 Thanks everyone - I knew my pals would cheer me up.... Foz has a GREAT idea (although I am normally in my BadFish gear - tons of pics to prove it It was the weirdest thing on Sunday. Last load of the day, sunset, see something out of the corner of my eye once under canopy and it is a FRIGIN BALD EAGLE....just tooling along with me. Every move I made, he copied. I even did a front riser dive and thought I lost him then looked down below my feet and there he was........Then Monday at 8am I got the call about Tommy. Hmmm.... Thanks again gang.....love to all - I'm ok. Dreams become reality, one choice at a time... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
