another joke

[lummy 4]

Little Nancy was in the garden filling in a hole when her neighbor peered over the fence. Interested in what the cheeky faced youngster was doing, he politely asked, "What are you up to there, Nancy?"

"My goldfish died," replied Nancy tearfully, without looking up, and I've just buried him."

The neighbor was concerned, "That's an awfully big hole for a goldfish, isn't it?"

Nancy patted down the last heap of earth then replied, "That's because he's inside your f- - -ing cat."

I promise not to TP Davis under canopy.. I promise not to TP Davis under canopy.. eat sushi, get smoochieTTK#1

[CrazyIvan 0]

LOL!!!

__________________________________________
Blue Skies and May the Force be with you.

[Fast 0]

lmao

~D
Where troubles melt like lemon drops Away above the chimney tops That's where you'll find me.
Swooping is taking one last poke at the bear before escaping it's cave - davelepka

[juanesky 0]

Stupid questions in a strip joint:

Will you sit on my face?
Why, is your nose bigger than your dick?

What would it take to get you to leave here with me?
A fire.

Are those real?
Real expensive.

You're a beautiful girl, but I prefer women with dark hair and natural breasts.
Oh, you would have loved me a week ago.

It's just a matter of price. I bet you'd go home with me for ten grand.
Certainly, and the bouncer would, too.

I'd really like to know your real name.
Why, do you think we might be related?

If I was your boyfriend, you'd have to stop working here.
If you were my boyfriend, you'd have to stop coming in here.

Why don't you let me take you away from all this?
Sure, but then how would I get away from you?

I've always wanted to have sex with two girls at once.
Me too!

My wife would kill me if she caught me in here.
Why, does she work here?

You must make a ton of money.
Why, are you giving me a ton of money?

I've got plenty of money.
I'm really happy for you, but I'm not interested in your money; I'm only interested in mine.

Do you think size is important?
Wallet, or penis?

I've got a twelve-inch cock.
That's a darn shame, because all I've got is a six-inch vagina.

Have you ever located your G-spot?
Yes, it's on my G-string.

Are you just in this for the money, or do you get horny while you're dancing?
I'm in it for the money, but making money makes me horny.

Don't you feel guilty about exploiting these poor guys for their money?
I used to, but now that I can afford therapy I don't feel guilty anymore.

It must be great to make all this money tax-free.
It's great, and it saves me all the trouble of being able to invest in the stock market or buy a house.

I bet this job really makes you hate men.
Only the ones who psychoanalyze me.

Why don't you go to college and get out of here?
I already went to college and I was glad to get out of there.

I usually don't come to these places.
Me neither.

I'm working on my thesis about adult entertainment, would you mind answering a few questions?
I'm working on my thesis about people who do theses on adult entertainment, would you mind answering a few questions? For instance, were you abused as a child?

Now that I've gotten to know you, I respect you too much to watch you dance.
I'm so so relieved, because I was so so worried about your opinion of me, but I hope you don't respect me too much to pay me anyway.

Now that I've gotten to know you, I respect you too much to watch you dance on a table.
I know what you mean--now that I've gotten to know you, I respect you too much to watch you sit at a desk.

How much is a table dance? (Usually asked by a guy who knows perfectly well how much a table dance costs.)
It's twenty dollars, and forty to get me to stop asking if you want one.

Frequently said to a naked woman with tan lines: I'd really like to see you in that bikini.
Then why did you just pay me to take it off?

Don't you feel bad about selling your body?
I haven't sold it. I still have it.

You seem too intelligent to be here.
You don't.

"According to some of the conservatives here, it sounds like it's fine to beat your wide - as long as she had it coming." -Billvon