ladyskydiver 0 #1 September 21, 2003 In Lebanon, men are legally allowed to have sex with animals, but the animals must be female. Having sexual relations with a male animal is punishable by death. (Like THAT makes sense.) *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* In Bahrain, a male doctor may legally examine a woman's genitals, but is prohibited from looking directly at them during the examination. He may only see their reflection in a mirror. (Do they look different reversed?) *~*~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* Muslims are banned from looking at the genitals of a corpse. This also applies to undertakers; the sex organs of the deceased must be covered with a brick or piece of wood at all times. (A brick??) *~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* The penalty for masturbation in Indonesia is decapitation. (Much worse than "going blind!") *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* There are men in Guam whose full-time job is to travel the countryside and deflower young virgins, who pay them for the privilege of having sex for the first time...Reason: under Guam law, it is expressly forbidden for virgins to marry. (Let's just think for a minute; is there any job anywhere else in the world that even comes close to this?) *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* In Hong Kong, a betrayed wife is legally allowed to kill her adulterous husband, but may only do so with her bare hands. The husband's lover, on the other hand, may be killed in any manner desired. (Ah! Justice!) *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* Topless saleswomen are legal in Liverpool, England - but only in tropical fish stores. (But of course!) *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* In Cali, Colombia, a woman may only have sex with her husband, and the first time this happens, her mother must be in the room to witness the act. (Makes one shudder at the thought.) *~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~*~* In Santa Cruz, Bolivia, it is illegal for a man to have sex with a woman and her daughter at the same time. (I presume this was a big enough problem that they to had to pass this law?) *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* In Maryland, it is illegal to sell condoms from vending machines with one exception: prophylactics may be dispensed from a vending machine only "in places where alcoholic beverages are sold for consumption on the premises." (Is this a great country or what? Not as great as Guam!) *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour. (Who volunteers for this stuff?) *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure. (Is that why Flipper was always smiling?) *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue. (Hummm....I won't touch THAT one!) *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* The ant can lift 50 times its own weight, can pull 30 times its own weight and always falls over on its right side when intoxicated. (From drinking little bottles of...? -- did the govt. pay for this research??) *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* Butterflies taste with their feet. (Ah, geez) *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* An ostrich's eye is bigger than it's brain. (I know some people like that.) *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* Starfish don't have brains. (I know some people like that too) *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* And, the best for last..... Turtles can breathe through their butts. (Do you think they have bad breath?)Life is short! Break the rules! Forgive quickly! Kiss slowly! Love truly, Laugh uncontrollably. And never regret anything that made you smile. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BASE813 0 #2 September 21, 2003 QuoteThere are men in Guam whose full-time job is to travel the countryside and deflower young virgins, who pay them for the privilege of having sex for the first time...Reason: under Guam law, it is expressly forbidden for virgins to marry. whats the number for the Guam employment agency!!! I dont give a shit if the pay is crap and there is no medical insurance or company car!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
miked10270 0 #3 September 21, 2003 "The penalty for masturbation in Indonesia is decapitation." "(Much worse than "going blind!")" Actually, to all intents & purposes you would go blind Remember back when "Indonesia" was Malaya & British? Perhaps You'll go blind" is just another example of British understatement. The French version would probably go something like "You must surrender your head" (although in French, obviously) but it just doesn't quite come across the same, does it. Now. Guam. Hmmm.... Does anyone have the immigration qualifications for there? Then again, want to bet against this being a thing for traditional villages in the middle of nowhere with the girls in question starting to make the Lebanon look the better bet? Mike. Taking the piss out of the FrenchAmericans since before it was fashionable. Prenait la pisse hors du FrançaisCanadiens méridionaux puisqu'avant lui à la mode. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dropoutdave 0 #4 September 21, 2003 QuoteTopless saleswomen are legal in Liverpool, England - but only in tropical fish stores. Damnit!! I lived in Liverpool for 2 years but never went to a tropical fish shop!! ------------------------------------------------------ May Contain Nut traces...... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BASE813 0 #5 September 21, 2003 bollocks its not true!!!! http://members.aol.com/magastodu/c_issues/ntl_news/01012002.htm so how many others are fiction??? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
FliegendeWolf 0 #6 September 21, 2003 QuoteHumans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure. Ummm...Bonobo monkeys?A One that Isn't Cold is Scarcely a One at All Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #7 September 21, 2003 QuoteHe may only see their reflection in a mirror. (Do they look different reversed?) Not much...errrr so I've heard. QuoteThe strongest muscle in the body is the tongue. (Hummm....I won't touch THAT one!) They all say that at first. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Vertifly 0 #8 September 22, 2003 QuoteHumans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure. Those are all great!!!! However, this one I find hard to believe. Apes and monkeys even masturbate. I've seen it in a zoo. This must be evidence of pleasure during sex as well. hmmmmmmmmm...curious. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Raefordite 0 #9 September 22, 2003 What a riot!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ladyskydiver 0 #10 September 22, 2003 I received these via an email from a friend. And, they are great for a laugh - even if some of them are not true.Life is short! Break the rules! Forgive quickly! Kiss slowly! Love truly, Laugh uncontrollably. And never regret anything that made you smile. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Muenkel 0 #11 September 22, 2003 QuoteProof That The World Is Nuts! Now I thought that was proven on election day 1992. OK, maybe not the world, but the nation. But after reading your list, I've now decided we're not as nutty as other parts of the world. BTW, are there any special shots or papers I need before I go to Guam? _________________________________________ Chris Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
billvon 3,107 #12 September 22, 2003 Other bizarre animal stuff: Octopi are remarkably intelligent; they can learn to push buttons to get a reward, and if a second octopus watches the first octopus push the buttons, he will learn which button to push without having to try it first. But an octopus with an armspan of 2 feet can still squeeze through a hole the size of a walnut. Rabbits eat their own feces on purpose (similar to a cow chewing its cud.) Most birds breathe at least partially through their bones; it helps keep them cool. Jellyfish go through a complex cycle of life; the free-swimming large adult is the _simplest_ of all its forms. At one point it's a highly differentiated swimming animal; in another part it's a sessile polyp. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SkyDekker 1,465 #13 September 22, 2003 QuoteRemember back when "Indonesia" was Malaya & British? Perhaps You'll go blind" is just another example of British understatement. Actually no I don't. As far as I can remember Indonesia was never under British control. It was however under Dutch control. I think with Malaya you might be refering to the current Malaysia, which was first under Portugese, then udner Dutcha nd finally under British control. Indonesia became independent after Dutch rule. If my memory serves me well, that happened after a 4 year struggle right after the end of WWII. And the Dutch are not known for their understatements Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jfields 0 #14 September 22, 2003 QuoteAnd the Dutch are not known for their understatements Nope. They are known for their dikes, among other things. Intepret that as you will. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skytash 0 #15 September 22, 2003 Quote Most birds breathe at least partially through their bones; it helps keep them cool. How? Surely the bones don't come into contact with the air, so how do they breathe through their bones? tashDon't ever save anything for a special occasion. Being alive is a special occasion. Avril Sloe Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
leroydb 0 #16 September 22, 2003 QuoteHumans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure. (Is that why Flipper was always smiling?) what about sex with dolphins? Someone sent me a link on a guy that actually did it, or was really good at story telling....Leroy ..I knew I was an unwanted baby when I saw my bath toys were a toaster and a radio... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
billvon 3,107 #17 September 22, 2003 >Surely the bones don't come into contact with the air, so how do they > breathe through their bones? Actually they do. Birds don't breathe like mammals; the air flows through their lungs from bottom to top rather than being constantly filled and emptied. There are a lot of air sacs in their chests and neck that help pump the air through their lungs. Some of that air gets pumped through their hollow bones before getting exhaled; this keeps the bones lighter and helps cool the bird. Flying takes a _lot_ of energy, and that means they need more oxygen and need more cooling than ground-based animals. Hence the bizarre system. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Skymonkey13 0 #18 September 22, 2003 Impala's mate while running 35 mph. And the only other known rapist other than humans is a Orangutan. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Phlip 0 #19 September 22, 2003 And cows can't swim. Because their butt holes have no muscles, the water gets into their as# and they can drown or get really hurt. Crazy hu?! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kingbunky 3 #20 September 22, 2003 ...and you know bout cow's butt muscles how? "Hang on a sec, the young'uns are throwin' beer cans at a golf cart." MB4252 TDS699 killing threads since 2001 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
billvon 3,107 #21 September 22, 2003 >And cows can't swim. ??? I know buffalo can swim. And I've seen cows crossing lots of water. >the water gets into their as# . . . Hmm. Cows are made mostly of water; why would getting some more water in them make them drown? People don't drown even when they really have to pee, or have diarrhea. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jfields 0 #22 September 22, 2003 QuotePeople don't drown even when they really have to pee Okay. Who else was amused by Bill using that terminology? Not that it was inaccurate, but it just struck me as funny coming from him. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites