skygazer 0 #1 September 23, 2003 Hi All, Me again...in spite of everyone's help, Sunday turned out terrible. Got to the DZ early...had promised to wait for some friends...they were late...didn't eat all day (just lost track of time) By the time we were together it was about 5 hours later. By the time we got ready to jump I was starting to get lightheaded (no food, warm weather). So there I was, all harnessed up, and now not only not feeling good - it played with my head, I was terrified at the thought of jumping. I kept saying, I did this before (hell, it's a TANDEM, for God's sake, I could just try to enjoy the ride) but I was totally freaked. The Otter rolls up and I told my instructor, I just couldn't do it, something screamed at me that jumping at that moment was not something I should do. I was MORTIFIED...had to take the long walk back to the hanger and wait for my friends. My instructor was great...told me always listen to the heart and don't overthink it. Well, overthinking is my specialty. I hope I'll be ok, I am hoping to go out this weekend and try again. Maybe it was the lack of food, but man, it messed up my confidence (which, if you saw my prior post was not exactly rock hard) and upset me big time. I have to say, I regret not be able to complete the jump but I do NOT regret the decision, it was the right thing to do. I was sure I wanted to start AFP next year, but now I am going to be happy to complete the tandem (I have done 2 prior) and make sure I don't freak out again. I LOVE what this sport has done for me and my life so far, I don't know what is happening in my head. It's crazy...sitting here at work I feel like I could go up right now with no problem. Crap, it's like stage fright!!!! Anyone have thoughts here...sorry for the length of the message, I debated if I should post or not...I feel like a fool. Thanks to all. Love ya's!!!!!!!!!!!!!!_______________________________________ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
QuickDraw 0 #2 September 23, 2003 Don't sweat it girl, its not a race, next time plan your day around yourself, its nice to have some moral support, and i guess you felt disappointed and maybe embarrassed for them too. Maybe ask your instructor what he/she thinks might be the best way to deal with your fears. Quoteoverthinking is my specialty. Then don't think, i hear women do it all the time. Good luck. -- Hope you don't die. -- I'm fucking winning Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skygazer 0 #3 September 23, 2003 Your are right about that.I think had I jumped when I first got there I think I would have been OK, just normal butterflies. My husband bitched me out...said jump for yourself, have fun, ya don't have to be the tour director. Damn, I hate it when he's right!_______________________________________ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
fallen1979 0 #4 September 23, 2003 Don't be embarrased! If it doesn't feel right.. don't do it (learn to say no) I came down on the plane on my 6th Afp jump.. this is after 5 tandems and 5 afp jumps and they were letting us out at 15k! Sometimes it just doesn't feel right and I can relate to the light headedness feeling. My first tandem I hadn't eaten all day due to nerves and it was about 95 degrees outside.. I enjoyed my next jumps a lot better with my stomach full.. but not too full You'll be fine.. you know you can do it.. you know it's fun and it only get's better! I left the DZ rather early on Sunday so I missed meeting you, sorry! Get back in the sky! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Push 0 #5 September 23, 2003 It's Ok to be scared. I remember being really scared on my 4th jump. The only reason I jumped was because my instructor was too busy with the static line that just finished deploying my buddy's chute to notice me freak out. By the time he was ready for me the plane was about halfway through the pass and I felt much better. I actually did really well on that jump. Overcoming the fear is one of the most rewarding aspects of skydiving, to me at least, but it's not easy. See my sig -- Toggle Whippin' Yahoo Skydiving is easy. All you have to do is relax while plummetting at 120 mph from 10,000' with nothing but some nylon and webbing to save you. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kelel01 1 #6 September 23, 2003 Hey girl. Don't worry about that. I actually admire you for not jumping. Every time I go (and this probably won't help you out to hear this) I get soooooo scared, but the fear of being humiliated is too much for me. I'm such a wuss, I'd rather jump out of a plane than admit that maybe I'm too scared. I think I might be a little loony. But seriously, as scared as I am (I CAN'T eat before I go, at all) every time I go it gets better and better. I'm about to graduate from the AFF program, and I am so glad that I continually pushed past my fears. Hope that helped a little. And remember: skydiving chicks rock! Kelly Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kai2k1 0 #7 September 24, 2003 Dont feel bad. Just use my "patented" lol rules: If it feels good DO IT Always listen to your little voice If it doesnt feel right, DONT DO IT If you hear other voices, make friends with them. J/K But seriously theres always another load and always another day... Blue Skies KAI There's no truer sense of flying than sky diving," Scott Cowan Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
FrenchyDiver 0 #8 September 24, 2003 Well Peggy, that's easy. You took the right decision. You listened to your little voice. No matter how many jumps we have, sometimes we still feel that "not his one" thingie.Now you said you feeled lighheaded eh? Well it does make sense as you didn't eat. let me try to explain how I see it, your body pumped fuel, but you forgot to top off the tank . Does it make sense? Remember that we burn more energy and calories when we are in these kind of situations. You'll be back in the air.What else I can say? Just this, I am very pleased to see you made a sound decision. I'm proud of you girl. Here's a hug for you. Keep us posted. JM Hispas Brothers President HISPA #2, Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
freakyflygirl 0 #9 September 24, 2003 I have to agree with the others....If it doesn't feel right....DON'T DO IT!!!! If this is truly something that you want to do you'll know when your ready. Do it in your own time. It'll be much better when YOUR ready. Hang in there girl!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sarge 0 #10 September 24, 2003 Just a bizarre fluke of fate pehaps that I should fall into your post I suppose. But here I am, wondering... I set up a 30+ tandem earlier this summer, that turned out being only 23 I think when it all was done and said. Your post has a resounding familiarity that seems to echo as if only from what might seem but a shadow or a whisper of a late night breeze; obscure and *diliquescent. I have no claim of experience to know what you are feeling; or were feeling on Sunday. I have, with all honesty, never felt that way. What causes me to wonder at this moment is why or how I feel I can identify with what you describe you're feeling. Perhaps only empathy (ironic) but perhaps it goes deeper than just making the , "jump." Because our own mortality confronts many of us as we consider each jump; and it is at that moment or in those moments of final gear-check, re-playing the jump plan and always mindful of past experiences and training that run thru our mind in micro-seconds that we rarely have time time to realize the simple, but fatal truth... we are mortal or should be anyway... Most of us, that is with no disrepect to collegues, realize there are grave risks and trust in many things outside or deep within ourselves that compel us to proceed. Only your heart or desire can know if you are meant to proceed. Nobody has ever been able to measure with certainty anothers probability for success. Where some fail and surrender they never proceed. Where some refuse to fail they never survive. I don't know what to say about the seven or so people that forfieted their deposits...? But maybe it just wasn't their time? They will never get more than a light-hearted rib (if I think they could handle it) for not jumping that day. Maybe another day ?-- I'm done with the personally meaningful and philosophical sigs!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skygazer 0 #11 September 24, 2003 Thank to everyone, I just love you guys and gals. What a great "family". I feel so much better!_______________________________________ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
hipgnosis 0 #12 September 24, 2003 Don't sweat it. Don't sweat it. Don't sweat it. Next time just go out to enjoy yourself and don't focus on the jump as much as having a good time. If you fixate on something it becomes much harder to overcome, as opposed to just relaxing and letting it happen as almost an incidental event of the day. In conclusion, always remember : Don't sweat it. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
FrenchyDiver 0 #13 September 24, 2003 Hey, you are our "Sis" after all. JM Hispas Brothers President HISPA #2, Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skygazer 0 #14 September 24, 2003 How cool is that? Ok, family, shall we get out our Christmas lists? Ha!_______________________________________ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
FrenchyDiver 0 #15 September 24, 2003 Sure, excellent idea. Make it a new rig, custome size and colors of course, matching new jumpsuit and helmet. Thanks Santa Hispas Brothers President HISPA #2, Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skygazer 0 #16 September 24, 2003 And your very own Otter...complete with pilot?_______________________________________ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
cloudseeker2001 0 #17 September 24, 2003 Yea, if it does not feel right, don't do it...............after 911 we went out to Spaceland for a jump and at about 7K Steve turned the plane around per FAA. Kinda spooked a few of us out too-not only landing in the plane but we were on the ground in 2 minutes or so! Then after he cleared the FAA, we had a flat on the runway........Mercedes and I thought that was a sign and walked back to the hanger! Nothing happened but still, did not feel right! Third time may have been a charm! Then Scotty Carbone said, "YEA, fuck that, I wouldn't jump either"! "Some call it heavenly in it's brilliance, others mean and rueful of the western dream" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
FrenchyDiver 0 #18 September 24, 2003 Gee...Thanks!!!Now you're talking. Hispas Brothers President HISPA #2, Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
chaoskitty 0 #19 September 24, 2003 My attitude may not work for everyone, but if I'm ever feeling like I want to chicken out, I just do it. Once youre in the plane, youre gonna go out the door, and then you have no choice but to do it and do it right. And since I know I can get in the plane and out the door.. I just do it.. and I always love it! However, I have had days where I just wasnt feeling it and then I just dont go to the DZ. That doesnt happen very often though. It really does take a while for things to start feeling natural in skydiving. I hope I never lose the jitters.. keeps me focused. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SpeedRacer 1 #20 September 25, 2003 don't worry about it next time. But remember: your emotional state is affected by your physical state. When you haven't eaten properly, it is much easier to experience feelings of despair, or depression, or fear (depending on the situation). Even in regular life (outside of skydiving), you may notice that you tend to feel depressed more easily if you haven't eaten regularly. I've heard at least one tandem instructer say that the students who backed out or threw up were the ones who DIDN'T eat breakfast! So make sure you do all those little things to make sure your brain is in the right state for skydiving, such as eating regular meals. But I'd recommend avoiding things with caffeine & refined sugar, they might make you more nervous. And you don't need caffeine when you've already got adrenaline. Speed Racer -------------------------------------------------- Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
