TheAnvil 0 #1 October 8, 2003 The Germans are geniuses sometimes. Normally I'm fairly patient with chicks and their shopping insanity - up to the one hour mark. Then I lose my patience. My anger usually increases exponentially (from the one hour and one atto-second Hiroshima-type explosion) with time at that point, unless she's trying on lingerie to model for me or something of the sort. Germans have found the answer: http://www.boston.com/news/world/europe/articles/2003/10/07/german_men_get_own_kindergarten_while_women_shop/ Chicks think it's funny, but if they'll buy me beer and leave me with chicken wings and football whilst they shop, I can deal with that (as long as they use their own credit card). Since I'm single now, I don't care, but you married guys might appreciate this.Vinny the Anvil Post Traumatic Didn't Make The Lakers Syndrome is REAL JACKASS POWER!!!!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
freeflygoddess 0 #2 October 8, 2003 Well not all woemn like to shop. I for one hate shopping. I guess mostly because I hate being around so many stupid people. Esp. during Chirstmas time. I refuse to go to any store, esp the grocery store. Just thought I would add that I would much rather be drining beer and watching a game, then shopping. Of course what I would rather be doing at all times is jumping or sex...sex is good too... Kathryn Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mfrese 0 #3 October 8, 2003 Vinnie, first off, do you remember that old "Farside" cartoon with the two deer chatting? One has a target on its chest, the other is saying "Bummer of a birthmark, Hal"? I think you're playing Hal... And being a married guy, I almost hate to admit this (almost makes me sound like one of them "metrosexuals" I've been reading about), but I kinda like shopping with Lynn. At least I get some input, and I get to pick stuff I like...of course, the stuff I REALLY like I usually have to pay for...besides, I only like beer after a day of skydiving now . IcemanDoctor I ain't gonna die, Just write me an alibi! ---- Lemmy/Slash Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TheAnvil 0 #4 October 8, 2003 LOL. Flame Vinny. I really hate that guy anyway. He's such a jackass. I can't say this about many people, but he sux donkey ba.....DAMMIT! Not all women like to shop, this is true. My ex did and it drove me insane the few times I agreed to accompany her. I thought the bar idea quite novel. Good you like to shop with Lynn. You're the only man I know who does.Vinny the Anvil Post Traumatic Didn't Make The Lakers Syndrome is REAL JACKASS POWER!!!!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lizzieb 0 #5 October 8, 2003 You can come shopping with me sometime Vinny... you can help me decide between heiniken and shiner Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
McDuck 0 #6 October 8, 2003 I've never really understood the problem going shopping with women. You get your own personal fashion show, usually. Kevin - Sonic Beef #5 - OrFun #28 "I never take myself too seriously, 'cuz everybody know fat birds don't fly." - FLC Online communities: proof that people never mature much past high school. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
CanuckInUSA 0 #7 October 8, 2003 Hey as long as she's not spending my jump $$$, any future spouse of mine can spend all the time she wants shopping just as long as my kindergarten is located at my friendly neighborhood DZ. Try not to worry about the things you have no control over Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mfrese 0 #8 October 8, 2003 What the hell do you mean "decide between"? You mean "carry", right? Doctor I ain't gonna die, Just write me an alibi! ---- Lemmy/Slash Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lizzieb 0 #9 October 8, 2003 QuoteWhat the hell do you mean "decide between"? You mean "carry", right? err...right. i stand corrected Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #10 October 8, 2003 Since my entire sense of taste is located in my mouth, my opinion in fashions is valueless. "How do you think this looks? Uhh... ok?" Unless women are buying swimsuits, I'm not going. I would doubt the manhood of any man who would go shopping until I realized the wisdom of the German method. A technique for getting free beer and wings? Excellent. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
McDuck 0 #11 October 8, 2003 QuoteSince my entire sense of taste is located in my mouth, my opinion in fashions is valueless. "How do you think this looks? Uhh... ok?" Unless women are buying swimsuits, I'm not going. I would doubt the manhood of any man who would go shopping until I realized the wisdom of the German method. A technique for getting free beer and wings? Excellent. I don't know fashion, but I know what I like looking at. Kevin - Sonic Beef #5 - OrFun #28 "I never take myself too seriously, 'cuz everybody know fat birds don't fly." - FLC Online communities: proof that people never mature much past high school. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TheAnvil 0 #12 October 9, 2003 Ugh.....me Vinny...carry beer....gooooood boy......Vinny the Anvil Post Traumatic Didn't Make The Lakers Syndrome is REAL JACKASS POWER!!!!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Michele 1 #13 October 9, 2003 I "conquer" shop. I hate trying things on in the store...so I just find what I like, get my size, and buy it right then. I rarely need to take things back, either. The only thing I'll actually try on in the store are shoes, and even those it's fast and simple...and I'd rather not shop in a group, so don't generally go with others. It's simple that way, you know? Ciels- Michele ~Do Angels keep the dreams we seek While our hearts lie bleeding?~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TheAnvil 0 #14 October 9, 2003 You are a great woman. I think I found the link so funny due to my own experience with Laura (yuck!) and my father's hatred of my mother's penchant for shopping. Vinny the Anvil Post Traumatic Didn't Make The Lakers Syndrome is REAL JACKASS POWER!!!!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TitaniumLegs 8 #15 October 9, 2003 QuoteI've never really understood the problem going shopping with women. You get your own personal fashion show, usually. ... except that the question "Does this dress make me look fat?" always seems to come up. FYI, incorrect answers: "No, it's your fat ass that makes your ass look fat." "What was the question? I was oggling that chick with the nice ass." (>o|-< If you don't believe me, ask me. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #16 October 9, 2003 Quote... except that the question "Does this dress make me look fat?" always seems to come up. My main problem is that my jumpsuit makes my package look too large. It has become a topic of discussion. I feel so... like a piece of meat. Is this wrong? Do you think that women respect me or just think I am a cheap thrill? signed, Perplexed Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TitaniumLegs 8 #17 October 9, 2003 Dear Perplexed I have the same problem. I found that leg straps further accentuate the issue. Try this: Instead of having your leg straps on either side of your "package", put them over your package. While I haven't tried it myself, I'm told that after some initial swelling, your package will be more compact. Another alternative my devoted fans have described is to "counterbalance" the package by placing a potato in your pants in the back. A corn cob may also work. (>o|-< If you don't believe me, ask me. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #18 October 9, 2003 Quote I'm told that after some initial swelling, You may have been told about the initial swelling, but mine seems to be evident. That is the problem. Apparently, women have less self-control than I originally thought. How am I to fend them off? I have stuff to do. I can't spend all day fulfilling their dreams. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TitaniumLegs 8 #19 October 9, 2003 Ahh, I see the problem. Well, maybe not "see" in the literal sense, which would put me off my midnight snack. Swelling of a package is not treated by massage as is the case with true muscles. Stop touching your package and it won't swell as much. However, one treatment that works on both kinds of muscles is ice packs. You can even use a jock strap - I mean "athletic supporter" - to hold it in place while you skydive. By athletic supporter I mean a jock strap - not a member of your fan club. By member, I mean a person, not your private spots. (>o|-< If you don't believe me, ask me. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #20 October 9, 2003 QuoteStop touching your package and it won't swell as much. There it is. It's not me touching it that causes the swelling. Do you think they are doing it wrong? Anyway, I agree with you on the athletic supporter idea. I now have my supporters carry my package on a pallate like Caesar entering Rome. (not that "entering" is somehow related to the discussion). However, Rome is not adverse to the idea. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NoShitThereIWas 0 #21 October 9, 2003 OMG Vinnie, That is one of the most fabulous ideas I've ever heard of. Those German people are pretty smart ... I'll bet they do a lot of business. I especially like the part where the women turn them in and get a receipt for their partners, that is funny. Now maybe guys will have some incentive to go to the malls with us. I think we need to adopt that idea here in America especially since lots of women could care less about beer or what game is playing on the boob tube and most guys dread shopping. Nice article! Roy Bacon: "Elvises, light your fires." Sting: "Be yourself no matter what they say." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
turtlespeed 226 #22 October 9, 2003 QuoteWell not all woemn like to shop. I for one hate shopping. I guess mostly because I hate being around so many stupid people. Esp. during Chirstmas time. I refuse to go to any store, esp the grocery store. Just thought I would add that I would much rather be drining beer and watching a game, then shopping. Of course what I would rather be doing at all times is jumping or sex...sex is good too... Kathryn That is what I call a good woman. And she packs too.I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
FliegendeWolf 0 #23 October 9, 2003 It's cheap, too! 10 euros for a meal, two beers and entertainment?A One that Isn't Cold is Scarcely a One at All Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
