Tailgate 0 #1 December 3, 2003 Have any of our DZ.com members who happen to be in law enforcement ever used these? Things Only A Police Officer Would Say... Just how big were those two beers? Your life is not my fault. The handcuffs are tight because they are new. They will stretch out after you wear them awhile. If you take your hands off the car, I will make your birth certificate a worthless document. If you run, you will only go to jail tired. Can you run faster than 1200 feet per second? So, you do not know how fast you were going. I guess that means I can write anything I want on your ticket, huh? Yes Sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I do not think it will help. Oh, did I mention that I AM the shift supervisor? Warning? You want a warning? Okay, I am warning you not to do that again or I will give you ANOTHER ticket. The answer to this last question will determine whether you are drunk or not: Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog? Fair?! You want me to be fair? Listen, fair is a place where you go to ride on rides, eat cotton candy, and step in monkey- poop. No Sir, we do not have quotas anymore. We used to have quotas, but now we are allowed to write as many tickets as we want. I know, I know, your kid is an honor student at the juvenile detention center. I am glad to hear that the Chief of Police is a good friend of yours. At least you know someone who can post your bail. No, I do not think that they should use the electric chair; I think they need to use electric BLEACHERS! Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and I get the big screen television. Life is tough; it is tougher when you are stupid. In God we trust; all other are suspects _________________________________________________ Let me live in my house by the side of the road and be a friend to man- Sam Walter Foss Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
CrazyIvan 0 #2 December 3, 2003 Sorry but...you are under arrest __________________________________________ Blue Skies and May the Force be with you. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Tailgate 0 #3 December 3, 2003 Bummer....... _________________________________________________ Let me live in my house by the side of the road and be a friend to man- Sam Walter Foss Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kai2k1 0 #4 December 3, 2003 damn, pulled over by the repost police There's no truer sense of flying than sky diving," Scott Cowan Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Rebecca 0 #5 December 3, 2003 Damn dude! That was over a year ago! Isn't there a statute of limitations on reposting? I'm gonna start calling you Sgt. Friday. Da da da DA Da Daaaaaaa! you've got to ask yourself one question: 'Do I feel loquacious?' -- well do you, punk? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Tailgate 0 #6 December 3, 2003 If I threw the word "BOOBIES" in a couple of times could I be released on my own good conduct? _________________________________________________ Let me live in my house by the side of the road and be a friend to man- Sam Walter Foss Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ACMESkydiver 0 #7 December 3, 2003 but...but...but...I never got to see it, Ivan! It's not a repost to me! It was very funny, thank you Tailgate...~Jaye Do not believe that possibly you can escape the reward of your action. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Tailgate 0 #8 December 3, 2003 You are most welcome. _________________________________________________ Let me live in my house by the side of the road and be a friend to man- Sam Walter Foss Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
