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dropdeded

Change of Attitude?

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First off, I have a really, really crappy jump record as far as numbers, and staying current. So that probably has a lot to do with why its taken so long to get into the frame of mind thats coming about.
Im finding that instead of driving to the dz thinking, "I may go in today, and I accept that risk", I now feel like,"Im probably NOT going to go in today". Im really much more comfortable when I get on that first load, and it is so much more enjoyable. I consistantly go over my emergency procedures and thats getting easier too, going over things calmly, instead of " oh shit, if this happens I got to do this".
Something else that I noticed is if some one doesn't jump, I dont want to sit and talk with them endlessly about skydiving, (like students at my school). I dont think it was as much a, "look at me, I skydive" attitude as it was just being able to talk about it with ANYONE. But now I realize this whole deal cant be explained, its got to be experienced, THEN we can talk:P

Whats goin on here ?

just ramblin

dropdeded
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The Dude Abides.
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huh! I think you bumped your head on the plane yesterday.. It'll go away.. You'll be back to your old self in no time..
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hmm, maybe your right. Must be from that riser smack yesterdayB|

dropdeded
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The Dude Abides.
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