Need moral support here, and advice.

[PhillyKev 0]

Broke up with my gf a few days ago. We were together just over 3 months and she recently started acting very jealous and suspicious for absolutely no reason. We were together almost all the time, there was no chance for me to be with anyone else, it's ridiculous. I got sick and tired of being accused of things and the past couple weeks it was almost daily, so I finally cut away.

Anyway...just got a dozen roses from her with a note pleading with me to take her back. I really don't want to. She's not the type of person that I want to be with.

Here's the problem. I feel bad for her and want her hurt as little as possible. I just don't want to be with her. She's made it clear that we can't have an amicable break up. If I break up with her, it'll be crying and screaming, and nothing short of not breaking up with her will prevent that. So what do I do?

[Nightingale 0]

if you're sure you don't want to be with her, then break up. Stringing her along is cruel. The "scene" is either going to happen now or later. Better now. Later will be much worse.

[rehmwa 2]

Take her to Spaceballs, that'll do the job.

Seriously, breakups are hard and hurt no matter what. It's better to be direct or she'll find a way to stretch it out. Then it'll be worse for you both. She'll move on. You already have.

...
Driving is a one dimensional activity - a monkey can do it - being proud of your driving abilities is like being proud of being able to put on pants

[McDuck 0]

Life is too short to not be happy in it.

Kevin - Sonic Beef #5 - OrFun #28
"I never take myself too seriously, 'cuz everybody know fat birds don't fly." - FLC
Online communities: proof that people never mature much past high school.

[turtlespeed 226]

Sorry to say it but, you know the saying "those that burn brightest . . ."

I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama
BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun

[Casie 0]

Go with your gut feeling. If YOU don't want to be with her & see no future with her......cutaway now & stay away, no reason to give her false hope........................Good Luck!

~Porn Kitty
WARNING: Goldschlager causes extreme emotional outbursts!

[jlmiracle 7]

CUTAWAY. In my past dating experiences, if they are accusing you of stuff your not doing, they are usually guilty of it. This may not be the case, since women are perfect and just don't ever get jealous or accusatory and freak out and stalk and stuff like that.

Good luck!

Judy

Be kinder than necessary because everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle.

[weegegirl 2]

that's sad. i'm sorry to here that phillyK. it sucks to be on either side of that equation. but, yeah, let her go. be firm and don't dick around with it. just break up. it'll hurt her no matter what, but it's going to hurt her eventually anyway, so might as well get it over with.

((((((((((((((((VIBES))))))))))))))))))

[skymama 37]

If you already know that you don't want to be with her, you'll hurt her less if you break it off clean right now. In my opinion, stringing someone along when you know the feelings aren't there for you but they are for her, is about the most hurtful thing you can do.

She is Da Man, and you better not mess with Da Man,
because she will lay some keepdown on you faster than, well, really fast. ~Billvon

[taln1rigr 0]

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Go with your gut feeling. If YOU don't want to be with her & see no future with her......cutaway now & stay away, no reason to give her false hope........................Good Luck!

Completely agree ... cut away now while there's still a chance for your survival. Sounds to me like she either:
#1 cheated on you & this is a classic case of the "Tell Tale Heart."
#2 enjoys & thrives on conflict which she will no doubt seek the entire time your together, justifiable or not ... it's probably part of her past programing it's all she knows so she'll continue to surround herself with it & entangle you into her web.

Don't allow yourself to be manipulated regardless of her tactics ... trust me on this one ... stick with your gut, your instincts & be true to yourself.

Way too many fish in the sea ....

[PhillyKev 0]

Yeah...I have been firm. Haven't talked to her since we broke up on Monday. Other than her calling twice and asking me to talk, me saying no, and her hanging up.

Problem is, I have some of her stuff at my house that I need to get to her. So I'm going to be seeing her at some point and know it's going to be a tear fest.

I'm definitely cutting away, no intentions to string her along or get back with her. Just looking for some way to mitigate her pain.

[bodypilot90 0]

Dating is about finding out if you are right for each other. Sounds like you found out she's not real emotionally sound. Run from those kind. You will be better off in the long run with out her.

[Nightingale 0]

Give her stuff to a mutual friend or one of her friends who is reliable if you don't want to see her.

[chopchop 0]

WAIT!! Hold everything.. isn't this the stripper? Send her to viking.. he could use the experience and she can use him as the rebound guy.. Sounds like win-win-win to me..

chopchop
gotta go... Plaything needs a spanking..

Lotsa Pictures

[lawrocket 3]

Kev:

One way or another, talk to her. Stay firm, but after three months, she at least deserves an explanation, and it may help her with closure.

The silent treatment is the worst.

My wife is hotter than your wife.

[jlmiracle 7]

You are probably not going to ease her pain but you will only make her and YOURSELF more miserable by giving her any indication that things may work out.

As far as her stuff, either drop it off when someone is with you and you can't "stay" long or have someone over if she comes to pick it up. Women can be very manipulative (oops I let a secret out) so don't be suckered in by tears.

Judy

Be kinder than necessary because everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle.

[PhillyKev 0]

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enjoys & thrives on conflict which she will no doubt seek the entire time your together, justifiable or not

ding ding ding. That's the issue. And it's my fault, too. I fall for passion. And my experience has told me that most passionate women are also emotionally unstable. It's just that the bad side doesn't show up until the good side of the newness of the relationship wears down.

Oh well, I'd still rather take chances with passionate women then settle down with someone safe and boring.

[Jessica 0]

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The silent treatment is the worst.

If he's already broken up with her and had all the discussions that go along with it, he owes it to both of them not to give her anymore face time. It will just make her think there is hope, and be painful for both of them.

Give her stuff to a mutual friend. Put a nice note with it, about how you'll cherish having been a part of her life, and that you're sorry for causing her pain.

She'll probably rip it up and hate you but there's nothing you can do.

Skydiving is for cool people only

[noname 0]

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Problem is, I have some of her stuff at my house that I need to get to her.

Don't play the "stuff game"! This is a big opportunity for her to start drama. If she knows you are not going to see her or talk to her at any other time, then this is her only oppurtunity and she may see fit to make the best use of it.

Get a friend to drop take it to her, arrange for someone else to be at your place when she picks it up, just leave it on her doorstep, etc ...

[PhillyKev 0]

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Women can be very manipulative (oops I let a secret out) so don't be suckered in by tears.

Yeah, that's the other thing. She had the opportunity to take her stuff the other day, but didn't. I'm pretty sure it was the old "leave behind" so that I'd have to see her again.

Ugghhh....oh well....I know what I have to do, don't even know why I posted this. Don't usually come here for this kind of crap. Was just hoping for a miracle solution.

Feel free to ignore this thread. Nothing to see here.

[Brains 2]

Dude i went through this same shit earlier this year. I told her i saw no future with her and that it was over. The crying thing sucks but it HAS to happen. I took her "stuff"(including the body paints) back to her place and she wanted to "talk" i told her i have nothing to say, and left. Haven't talked to her since. Just make it a clean break.

Never look down on someone, unless they are going down on you.

[Rdy2skydive 0]

Yikes! That's a tough situation. The best thing to do is say what you mean and mean what you say. Stick to your guns. Breaking up with someone is never easy - especially when the person you're breaking up with doesn't want to accept it. And unfortunately, hurt feelings are unavoidable. No matter how kind you are, there's a good chance someone will get hurt.

Mail her stuff back to her or give it to a friend. Don't take her calls and don't return them. It will be hard for her at first but it may be the only way she will realize you no longer want a relationship with her. Anytime you talk to her or agree to see her, it plants the seed of hope in her mind and she will continue to hang on to you. Make a clean break so you can both move on. Good luck!

[Kramer 0]

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I just don't want to be with her.

I know this makes me a dick...buuuut: Give the flowers to your neighbor, and tell her that you have no interest in being with her. Period. That simple.

Don't waste your time passifying her until she accepts you guys' fate...she's a big girl, she can handle it.

-Kramer

The FAKE KRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMER!!!!!!!!!

[meltdown 0]

Run. Fast. And get a watchdog.

[PhillyKev 0]

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Give the flowers to your neighbor

Oh, I picked them up from the receptionist, read the card, threw it out, and put the flowers on a co-workers desk.

I kind of think I should have a face to face talk with her, just because we were both a little buzzed at the time I cut away, and haven't spoken since. Not changing my mind in the slightest, but maybe I should explain to her, when she's sober, exactly why.

I'll probably meet up with her at a coffee shop to talk and have her stuff in the car for her.