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Nightingale

Euphemisms

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If anyone can help with this, I know you can....

I had a rather bizarre conversation with a friend last night on the phone. (drunk dial on her part... I was sober)

Somehow the subject of ...um... killing kittens came up.

And we began to try to figure out all the other ways of saying "killing kittens", such as "spanking the monkey" and "flogging the dolphin" and others.

can you add to our list?

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...and I'm sure Crazy Ivan will find where this has been posted before.

here's a few more:

Haulin' Oats

Workin' and jerkin' his gherkin

Jackin' the Beanstalk

One of my favorites:

"Shaking Hands With the Unemployed."

B|


For a woman you say she is:

Double-clicking her mouse

Flickin' the switch.

Auditioning the Finger Puppets


Unless she's using a dildo in which case she is:

Cleaning her oven.

B|
Speed Racer
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Ok, I have to stop now, b/c I'm cringing. :D:)

Kelly



Yeah, I actually avoided this one, but you ploughed right ahead. :D
Kevin - Sonic Beef #5 - OrFun #28
"I never take myself too seriously, 'cuz everybody know fat birds don't fly." - FLC
Online communities: proof that people never mature much past high school.

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I believe that I read my all-time favorite euphemism for male masturbation in the Kama Sutra ~ "Seizing the Lion"

Edited: The following texts from The Kama Sutra (which date back to the forth century B.C.), describe how Hindus relieved sexual energy when they didn't have a partner.

"When men have no women to sleep with, they satisfy themselves with other kinds of vulvas, or with dolls, or else masturbate.  He manages by simply "seizing the lion" [simbakranta], meaning masturbation."

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