Gawain 0 #1 February 23, 2004 I couldn't care less if it's a repost (I'm certain the cat portion is) ......... EXCERPTS FROM A DOG'S DAILY DIARY: 8:00 a.m. Oh, boy! Dog food! My favorite! 9:30 a.m. Oh, boy! A car ride! My favorite! 9:40 a.m. Oh, boy! A walk! My favorite! 10:30 a.m. Oh, boy! Getting rubbed and petted! My favorite! 11:30 a.m. Oh, boy! Dog food! My favorite! Noon - Oh, boy! The kids! My favorite! 1:00 p.m. Oh, boy! The yard! My favorite! 4:00 p.m. Oh, boy! To the park! My favorite! 5:00 p.m. Oh, boy! Dog food! My favorite! 5:30 p.m. Oh, boy! Pretty Mums! My favorite! 6:00 p.m. Oh, boy! Playing ball! My favorite! 6:30 p.m. Oh, boy! Watching TV with my master! My favorite! 8:30 p.m Oh, boy! Sleeping in master's bed! My favorite! EXCERPTS FROM A CAT'S DAILY DIARY: Day 183 of My Captivity: My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional of furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another houseplant. Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded; must try this at the top of the stairs. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair, must try this on their bed. Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body, in an attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was. (Hmmm, not working according to plan.) There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary confinement throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the food. More importantly, I overheard that my confinement was due to my power of "allergies." Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage. I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The bird, on the other hand, has got to be an informant, and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room, his safety is assured. But I can wait, it is only a matter of time..... All I can say is, dogs rock!So I try and I scream and I beg and I sigh Just to prove I'm alive, and it's alright 'Cause tonight there's a way I'll make light of my treacherous life Make light! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
EdC 0 #2 February 23, 2004 Cats are like that, dogs rock. I've got four of them. Two of them are mine and two of them are hers. I try to keep mine from eating hers. Big Ed Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jb092 0 #3 February 24, 2004 That desribes my cat and dog perfectly. What could possibly go wrong? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
pleifer 0 #4 February 24, 2004 yup mine too.... funny a couple of years back when I had an African Gray too..... the bird would try to tell the dog and cat what to do... _________________________________________ The Angel of Duh has spoke Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Clownburner 0 #5 February 24, 2004 I had an ex who had a green amazon parrot that had learned to drop food out of it's cage and call the dog (By name, no less). When the dog would arrive and bend over to get the food, the bird would jump down and peck it on the head until the dog ran away, after which the bird would make an evil laughing sound. I swear it's true. That bird was one mean mother f---er.7CP#1 | BTR#2 | Payaso en fuego Rodriguez "I want hot chicks in my boobies!"- McBeth Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
pleifer 0 #6 February 24, 2004 Mine would slide down the bars anytime the dog was near... and try to bit his ears..... but I always knew when the dog or cat was doing something like eating the couch... cause dixie... the bird would start screaming NO!, NO!, gunner NO! so hilarious...... it talked alot... but loved to copy the answering machine anytime someone called.... frikin histarical so yea i believe ya _________________________________________ The Angel of Duh has spoke Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kennedy 0 #7 February 24, 2004 Birds are evil. Ful stop, end of story.witty subliminal message Guard your honor, let your reputation fall where it will, and outlast the bastards. 1* Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
