MattM 0 #1 March 17, 2004 "Sometimes when I reflect back on all the jumps I've made I feel ashamed. Then I look at the packer packing my Stiletto and think about all the little old ladys at PD and all of their hopes and dreams. If I didnt jump this canopy, they might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered. Then I say to myself "It is better to jump all the time and let their dreams come true than be selfish and worry about not blowing my money on jumping." Deep Thoughts by Jack Handy Matt Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Gawain 0 #2 March 17, 2004 "Sometimes when it's raining, and a kid asks me why it rains, I think it's kinda cute to tell them, 'Because God is crying.' When they ask me why God is crying, I think it's kinda cute to tell them, 'Probably because of something you did.' " So I try and I scream and I beg and I sigh Just to prove I'm alive, and it's alright 'Cause tonight there's a way I'll make light of my treacherous life Make light! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
DeNReN 0 #3 March 17, 2004 Think of those words as you pay for there therapy a little later in life. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Gawain 0 #4 March 17, 2004 QuoteThink of those words as you pay for there therapy a little later in life. *tongue in cheek* Therapy-shmerapy...I'd prefer to let them work it out through their impending depression in school, getting in fights, leading on to drug and alcohol abuse, then me kicking them out of the house, they drop out of high-school. Then, they can go to rehab on taxpayer money. So I try and I scream and I beg and I sigh Just to prove I'm alive, and it's alright 'Cause tonight there's a way I'll make light of my treacherous life Make light! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
packaho 0 #5 March 17, 2004 Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey #30: If you go parachuting, and your parachute doesn't open, and your friends are all watching you fall, I think a funny gag would be to pretend you were swimming. sky, fallatio #8, infructose #3, bumpy brother Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kris 0 #6 March 17, 2004 One day, we all laughed at Bob as he was trying to land and fell on his behind. But then I thought, "What if I was an ant, and he fell on me?"Sky, Muff Bro, Rodriguez Bro, and Bastion of Purity and Innocence!™ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lizard 0 #7 March 17, 2004 "I think we should make the world safer for our children, but not our children's children, because I don't think children should be having sex" -Jack Handy "If you are traveling in a time machine and eating corn on the cob, I don't think it will effect things either way, but my point is corn on the cob is good" -Jack Handy Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dkf1979 0 #8 March 17, 2004 One thing kids like is to be tricked. For instance, I was going to take my little nephew to Disneyland, but instead I drove him to an old burned-out warehouse. "Oh, no," I said. "Disneyland burned down." He cried and cried, but I think that deep down, he thought it was a pretty good joke. I started to drive over to the real Disneyland, but it was getting pretty late. more jack handy http://www.cco.net/~jpete/deepthou.htm Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
