skydived19006 4 #1 June 1, 2004 I’ve done about 500 tandems (as instructor), and I’m getting board of the same old material I use with my passengers. I’m looking for clever “tag lines” or whatever to use with my students. I often say after opening “well, looks like we’re goin’ to live!” obviously my tandem passengers don’t know that I say this to just about everybody, but I’m getting tired of it. Also, the time between hooking up and door is primetime for “clever”! I also do video; I’m in need of a few new/different “interview” ideas for both before and after. Also along those lines, give me your “clever” ideas as a response to the somewhat typical passenger (usually female) response of “that’s better than sex!” comment. Feel free to contribute whether you’re a tandem instructor, former passenger, or whatever!Experience is what you get when you thought you were going to get something else. AC DZ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
newsstand 0 #2 June 1, 2004 Heard a good one yesterday. After the camera man did the standard "have you taken your Prozac" question of the TM he asked if he had taken his Viagra. When the TM said yes the camera man suggested that it was going to be a "packed jump." "Truth is tough. It will not break, like a bubble, at a touch; nay, you may kick it about all day like a football, and it will be round and full at evening." -- Oliver Wendell Holmes Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
turtlespeed 226 #3 June 1, 2004 As you are scooting to the door - TM to Passenger: Remeber - Yelling and screaming is allowed - but if it bothers you - tell me and i'll stop.I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skydived19006 4 #4 June 1, 2004 QuoteAs you are scooting to the door - TM to Passenger: Remeber - Yelling and screaming is allowed - but if it bothers you - tell me and i'll stop. I like that one! It just made the rotation.Experience is what you get when you thought you were going to get something else. AC DZ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skydived19006 4 #5 June 1, 2004 QuoteAs you are scooting to the door - TM to Passenger: Remeber - Yelling and screaming is allowed - but if it bothers you - tell me and i'll stop. I like that one! It just made the rotation.Experience is what you get when you thought you were going to get something else. AC DZ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
turtlespeed 226 #6 June 1, 2004 Twice EvenI'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lummy 4 #7 June 1, 2004 borrowed from one of our tandem instructors: "IF everything looks black after we leave the plane, open your eyes"I promise not to TP Davis under canopy.. I promise not to TP Davis under canopy.. eat sushi, get smoochieTTK#1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
slotperfect 7 #8 June 1, 2004 There's already a thread going on exactly this subject HERE in the Instructors ForumArrive Safely John Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
WrongWay 0 #9 June 1, 2004 My favorite one at my dz was "Do not grab my hands at any point during the skydive. We will need them to open the parachute, and I WILL chew through the back of your head to get to them." *pointing to student release" "See this? DON'T TOUCH IT. It makes my skydive a lot slower and yours a lot faster, but mine won't end with a splat." And if ya really wanna have some fun with them, have another instructor sign your first jump certificate in front of them before you go. Wrong Way D #27371 Mal Manera Rodriguez Cajun Chicken Ø Hellfish #451 The wiser wolf prevails. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skydived19006 4 #10 June 1, 2004 QuoteThere's already a thread going on exactly this subject HERE in the Instructors Forum There's some good stuff there!Experience is what you get when you thought you were going to get something else. AC DZ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LoudDan 0 #11 June 1, 2004 From one of our South African TM's, to student: "Just think of it like this dude, doing a tandem skydive is a lot like anal sex......the more you relax, the more fun I have." Coming soon to a bowl of Wheaties near you!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Dougiefresh 0 #12 June 1, 2004 I saw one that made me laugh, the instructor did a "strength test" on the harness, pulled on it and undid one of the buckles, freaks out and starts taping it back together. The cameraman is like, "Now what did you do?!" All exasperated. Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so. --Douglas Adams Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skydived19006 4 #13 June 1, 2004 QuoteFrom one of our South African TM's, to student: "Just think of it like this dude, doing a tandem skydive is a lot like anal sex......the more you relax, the more fun I have." I might use that one, but I don't think it'll become part of my usual routine! I had a girl proclaim once after landing “I need to FUCK now!” I told her that I would have to check with my wife on that one, and get back with her.Experience is what you get when you thought you were going to get something else. AC DZ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
turtlespeed 226 #14 June 1, 2004 On the way up show them the Tandem I's manual and ask them to pronounce a word from it. Camera man - Are you the new Tandem I.? TI - No - But, I stayed at a Holiday inn express last night.I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
