ACMESkydiver 0 #1 June 23, 2004 JUGHEAD'S GUIDE ON HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT: 1. She is not a BABE or a CHICK -- She is a BREASTED AMERICAN. 2. She is not a SCREAMER or a MOANER -- She is VOCALLY APPRECIATIVE. 3. She is not EASY -- She is HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE. 4. She is not a DUMB BLONDE -- She is a LIGHT HAIRED DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY. 5. She has not BEEN AROUND -- She is a PREVIOUSLY ENJOYED COMPANION. 6. She is not an AIRHEAD -- She is REALITY IMPAIRED. 7. She does not get DRUNK or TIPSY -- She gets CHEMICALLY INCONVENIENCED. 8. She does not have BREAST IMPLANTS -- She is MEDICALLY ENHANCED. 9. She does not NAG YOU -- She becomes VERBALLY REPETITIVE. 10. She is not a Tramp -- She is SEXUALLY EXTROVERTED. 11. She does not have MAJOR LEAGUE HOOTERS -- She is PECTORALLY SUPERIOR. 12. She is not a TWO-BIT Hooker -- She is a LOW COST PROVIDER. ---------------------------------------------------------------- HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT: 1. He does not have a BEER GUT -- He has developed a LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY. 2. He is not a BAD DANCER -- He is OVERLY CAUCASIAN. 3. He does not GET LOST ALL THE TIME -- He INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS. 4. He is not BALDING -- He is in FOLLICLE REGRESSION. 5. He is not a CRADLE ROBBER -- He prefers GENERATIONALLY DIFFERENTIAL RELATIONSHIPS. 6. He does not get FALLING-DOWN DRUNK -- He becomes ACCIDENTALLY HORIZONTAL. 7. He does not act like a TOTAL ASS -- He develops a case of RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION. 8. He is not a MALE CHAUVINIST PIG -- He has SWINE EMPATHY. 9. He is not afraid of COMMITMENT -- He is MONOGAMOUSLY CHALLENGED. 10. He is not HORNY -- He is SEXUALLY FOCUSED. 11. Its not his crack you see hanging out of his pants..... It's REAR CLEAVAGE. ~Jaye Do not believe that possibly you can escape the reward of your action. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Girlfalldown 0 #2 June 23, 2004 OMG thats too cute. -------------- (Do not, I repeat DO NOT, take my posts seriously.) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
