happythoughts 0 #1 July 12, 2004 I'm thinking of writing a new book. Here's my reason. Most self-help books are bought by women. If you could find a book that men would buy too, you'd have a gold mine. Here is the hook, it's a diet book (so women buy it) and men will buy it for women (so men buy it too). I was just talking to a friend of mine. She was raised on a hog farm in Missouri. She said that her dad would put 4 boars in a pen with 30 sows for 25 to 30 days. At the end of the 30 days, the boars would have lost 20 to 30 lbs each. Then he'd put them in a pen by themselves for 30 days to "recuperate". The main theme of the book is that if women want their men to lose weight, they should have sex with them 6 times a day. I'll let you guys know when I'm going to appear on Oprah. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
hookitt 1 #2 July 12, 2004 QuoteHere is the hook, it's a diet book (so women buy it) and men will buy it for women (so men buy it too). Women will buy in hopes to lose weight. That half will be succesful If a man buys it for the woman she'll accuse him of calling her fat. She'll never read the book cuz she's mad, therefore the six times a day sex won't happen to the poor sap if he does buy it. It should go well with the big knot on his noggin for suggesting a diet book. My grammar sometimes resembles that of magnetic refrigerator poetry... Ghetto Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #3 July 12, 2004 No, I meant it from the perspective of helping the guy. A guy is sitting around, watching the game, and drinking a few brews. His wife complains that he is gaining too much wait. His response, "I would love to lose this weight if only I felt that you would be supportive." Once he gets the "Of course, anything dear" committment, he pops out the book. She is helping him lose weight by banging him senseless. Let's face it, it's worth a try, and you do have my book to prove it's scientific value. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ACMESkydiver 0 #4 July 12, 2004 QuoteThe main theme of the book is that if women want their men to lose weight, they should have sex with them 6 times a day. How long have you been married?? Getting once a day is difficult...~Jaye Do not believe that possibly you can escape the reward of your action. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
hookitt 1 #5 July 12, 2004 QuoteLet's face it, it's worth a try, and you do have my book to prove it's scientific value. I do not have your book. Hurry and write it. However I really don't need to lose weight. How can I work it to help me?My grammar sometimes resembles that of magnetic refrigerator poetry... Ghetto Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
QuickDraw 0 #6 July 12, 2004 QuoteThe main theme of the book is that if women want their men to lose weight, they should have sex with them 6 times a day. Fuck that.... i'm far too lazy. Doughnut anyone ? -- Hope you don't die. -- I'm fucking winning Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RoadRash 0 #7 July 12, 2004 QuoteQuoteLet's face it, it's worth a try, and you do have my book to prove it's scientific value. I do not have your book. Hurry and write it. However I really don't need to lose weight. How can I work it to help me? Eat more......Gain weight, then suggest a way to lose it to your sweetie... ~R+R...Just a suggestion......~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ Fly the friendly skies...^_^...})ii({...^_~... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #8 July 12, 2004 QuoteHow long have you been married?? Getting once a day is difficult See? It's a guide for marital bliss also. An all-purpose book. I'll put it in the other section and re-title it as "How to have a happier marriage" and add pictures. With the success the idea is having, I need to be careful. 200 years from now, people will be reading my book and knocking each other off because of what the Prophet Bill says. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #9 July 12, 2004 QuoteI do not have your book. Hurry and write it. However I really don't need to lose weight. How can I work it to help me? Ok, let's review the basic male-female relationship equation... telling them lies = sex. Just tell them your fat. No wonder these books are so big, you have to start where the Earth cooled. They all think they are too fat, just tell them you are too and they are your only help. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #10 July 12, 2004 QuoteFuck that.... i'm far too lazy. Maybe. Now, my cousin? He's lazy. He's so lazy that he married a pregnant woman. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #11 July 12, 2004 Do you think my jumpsuit makes me look fat? ... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Thanatos340 1 #12 July 12, 2004 Sounds Similar to a diet plan I came up with a few years ago based on the same principal. The Sex and Fruit Diet Plan: 1. Each Morning.. Sex before you get out of bed. 2. For breakfast, You are limited to Fruit (Bananas, Grapefruit, Oranges, Strawberries ect..) 3. Mandatory that you figure out some way to slip in a Nooner. 4. Afterwards, A Lunch consisting of just fruit. 5. For Dinner, A nice reasonable, healthy Meal. 6. and Then Sex at least twice before bed. Not only is this diet healthy and very effective, You are guaranteed to be a lot happier. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
damion75 0 #13 July 13, 2004 QuoteNot only is this diet healthy and very effective, You are guaranteed to be a lot happier. I don't know about that... I do like my bacon sandwiches on the weekend... and I think if I only ate fruit from the canteen at the DZ I would about pass out at the end of a long day's skydiving from hunger! Nope, eat lots and *************** Not one shred of evidence supports the theory that life is serious - look at the platypus. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
AirMail 0 #14 July 13, 2004 This assumes you have a basic male-female relationship. P--- It's never too late to have a happy childhood. Postal Rodriguez, Muff 3342 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #15 July 13, 2004 QuoteThis assumes you have a basic male-female relationship. P- You've seen some of the women I hang out with, they're pretty basic. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites