miked10270 0 #1 September 16, 2004 As Hurricane Ivan continues its path of destruction through the Southern Democratic States, Representatives of Democrat Candidate John Kerry issued yet another broadside at the “Swift Boat Veterans For Truth”. A senior Kerry aide was quoted as stating “It’s a well known fact that Hurricanes are caused by hot air, and the… (SBVFT)… have certainly generated a whole hell of a lot of that. These (SBVFT) are “Boat” people, and boats go in the Caribbean, right. We believe that there is a causative link. Please excuse us for using such republican words as “hell”, but we are really quite incensed at the fragrant Mrs. Kerry having to abandon her previous shopping and beauty engagements to watch some peons pack disaster relief parcels which do not contain Ketchup!” The Kerry aide went on to point out “Hurricane Ivan has caused major damage in the affected, traditionally Democrat states. These states have suffered a massive loss of paper punches and other pressed aluminum products – including many of our voters’ homes. We understand that numerous Democrat’s trailers have been blown as far away as Texas; where not only are they not registered as voters, but feel that their votes wouldn’t count anyway. Our polls in that state show a 134% support for G.W. Bush staying; ‘The hell away from us… Washington will do!’ and as such our voters’ impact will be greatly reduced.” Aides to President Bush have responded angrily to the Democrat accusations of Republican bias in recent tropical storms, claiming that “While Hurricane Ivan has partially submerged such left wing Democrat hotbeds as Grenada, Cuba, and err… Brit stuff, that is pure co-incidence.” President Bush is quoted as saying “We would like to take this opportunity to point out that both Ivan, and the Inpend… err… Impoundin’, err… soon to arrive Jeanne are in fact French & Commie names, and as such can have no connection with The Republican Party. Also, lettin’ RICH people buy assault rifles again will reduce looting by poor people.” The Bush campaign team has also hit out at the latest Kerry campaign tactics which appear to be specifically targeted at US “Postal Voters” presently in Iraq, Afghanistan and shortly North Korea. It is alleged that the slogan: “Vote for me and come home like I did!” is in fact an electoral bribe. While the Kerry Campaign Headquarters insist the phrase “Like I Did” means ‘as a hero’, republicans insist the phrase means ‘In a Fortnight!’ A US Marine interviewed stated: “I feel that… SHIT!!! Git yo’ haids dahn. Them Goddam’ smelly sandkickin ragheads are gonna advance on us! We’ in deep $shit here, cut off a long way from home, no Quarter Pounders, and inadequate latrines. We wuz told they had nuttin’ more deadly than sharpened melon slices…! Look out guys... INCOMING STALE BAGUETTES!!!” At this time our Paris correspondent made his excuses and returned to his favorite Bistro. In related news, Floridians have preemptively requested “Urgent and Massive” Federal relief from the likely effects and the course taken by “Hurricane Jeb”, which is expected to blow up around November 4th. Mike. Taking the piss out of the FrenchAmericans since before it was fashionable. Prenait la pisse hors du FrançaisCanadiens méridionaux puisqu'avant lui à la mode. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
chopchop 0 #2 September 16, 2004 dude.. you just caused me pain.. this is the bonfire.. off to the speaker's corner with your political drivel.. chopchop gotta go... Plaything needs a spanking.. Lotsa Pictures Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
miked10270 0 #3 September 16, 2004 Surely it's satire, not politics. It takes equal pi$$ out of both parties and surely it's humour? Mike. Taking the piss out of the FrenchAmericans since before it was fashionable. Prenait la pisse hors du FrançaisCanadiens méridionaux puisqu'avant lui à la mode. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
PhreeZone 20 #4 September 16, 2004 Sorry Mike... I see the humor in it, but politics are'nt allowed in here Besides this will quickly break down into a political thread.Yesterday is history And tomorrow is a mystery Parachutemanuals.com Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jtval 0 #5 September 16, 2004 HOW CAN YOU DARE TO POST ASOMETHING ION THIS THREAD ABOUT POLITICS... ONLY MY OPINION COUNTS LOL(in case youre confused I just goofin around)My photos My Videos Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sebazz1 2 #6 September 16, 2004 Dude where's my forum? Hahaha... Just postin for fun nothing of worth to really add. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
CSpenceFLY 1 #7 September 16, 2004 Their all a bunch of crooks.I vote for me. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sangiro 26 #8 September 16, 2004 Quotedude.. you just caused me pain.. this is the bonfire.. Satire folks... Keep it light. Mike has been on Dropzone.com longer than Google.Safe swoops Sangiro Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jtval 0 #9 September 16, 2004 yea, he keeps rearing his ugly head around here. ( no offense mike its only a "TERM' I dont really know if your head is ugly)My photos My Videos Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
AggieDave 6 #10 September 16, 2004 That's not too long, google has only been around a few years... Mike's been on DZ.com since HH's first jump course... -or- Mike's been on DZ.com since it was a dialup modembank in HH's basement... Now that's a long time ago.--"When I die, may I be surrounded by scattered chrome and burning gasoline." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
miked10270 0 #11 September 16, 2004 QuoteSorry Mike... I see the humor in it, but politics are'nt allowed in here Hmmm... I posted it patently as fiction, for amusement. It's intended to be funny political satire and as such, apolitical. The image of the Paris Embassy Marine Guard cowering from a hail of stale baguettes... Well QuoteBesides this will quickly break down into a political thread. Yeah... If it goes into SC it'll be hijacked (as usual) by the "usual suspects". I'd just like to post some humour and see the humorous intent carried on(?) by a balanced audience. Mike. Taking the piss out of the FrenchAmericans since before it was fashionable. Prenait la pisse hors du FrançaisCanadiens méridionaux puisqu'avant lui à la mode. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
miked10270 0 #12 September 17, 2004 QuoteThat's not too long, google has only been around a few years... Mike's been on DZ.com since HH's first jump course... -or- Mike's been on DZ.com since it was a dialup modembank in HH's basement... Now that's a long time ago. Heh heh.... What it is to have low friends in high places. Y'all see, back in the days when HH's 14k modem was powered by a hamster on a wheel... Well, I fed that Hamster Of course, the hamster died (NOT MY FAULT!!!) but just then, a female poster here, who shall remain nameless (cuz I can't remember her name) "forced" HH at gunpoint (I'm sure she was Texan) to chain her up in his basement! Needless to say that meant building a bigger wheel, but we did get far faster connections. This poor girl needs to be fed... So buy the Premier Membership and save her from starvation (if not from sexual exhaustion). Mike. Taking the piss out of the FrenchAmericans since before it was fashionable. Prenait la pisse hors du FrançaisCanadiens méridionaux puisqu'avant lui à la mode. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
chopchop 0 #13 September 17, 2004 Sorry, Mike.. I don't really care if it's in here or not.. didn't mean to offend.. I actually started reading it, thought it was capping on some politician and replied.. it was too long for my short attention span.. chopchop gotta go... Plaything needs a spanking.. Lotsa Pictures Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
leroydb 0 #14 September 17, 2004 <--- have mike beat.. unless you change the date of Jan 17, 2001Leroy ..I knew I was an unwanted baby when I saw my bath toys were a toaster and a radio... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sangiro 26 #15 September 17, 2004 Quote<--- have mike beat.. unless you change the date of Jan 17, 2001 Dude, Mike was here long before there was even registration required on the first set of forums. But I'm sure you can find something else that will be bigger than his.... Safe swoops Sangiro Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
leroydb 0 #16 September 17, 2004 :-)Leroy ..I knew I was an unwanted baby when I saw my bath toys were a toaster and a radio... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
miked10270 0 #17 September 17, 2004 This just in from the forthcoming Presidential elections in Florida. Please note that the public announcer at the polling station, is a human being just like you and me and doesn't deserve resentment and abuse. "Voters please note the arrival of Hurricane Norman from Cuba. Norman will be upon us in.....oh about...ten minutes, so please try to hang on to your identity documents. As you have registered here please try and keep up this polling stations in your cars. If this proves impossible due to Typhoon Gina kindly make your way to the dry polling stations in Ohio." "We would further reassure voters about Tsunami Lisa..she's not due for at least another 2 hours. Apparently Tidal Waves Bruno and Desmond are ahead of her, which is causing the delay....so there's a bit of good news". "Voters I've just been handed a piece of paper from our good friends at the weather office. It seems like good news....on Thursday next week we'll see the Sun...wait! I was a bit hasty, apparently they believe the Sun is careering out of it's orbit and they believe it'll crash into Florida.......unless an asteroid like the one which wiped out the Dinosaurs crashes into us first, in which case it'll all become academic....ho ho so let's all pull for that asteroid!!" "I hate to mention this at a time like this, I'm sure you've got enough problems of your own, but my sinuses are killing me. At first I thought it was the damp but I'm starting to get a sneaky suspicion that this may be down to all the radioactivity generated by the water seeping into strategic storage plants. My doctor says that if I'm right we'll all be dead before Christmas....don't forget to mark your ballot papers correctly and move quickly...lets vote as many as we can before...whatever's due next". But don't worry. There's still Disney-World in California... Unless Earthquake Wylie gets it. In which case it's Surrender-Disney near Paris! Mike. Taking the piss out of the FrenchAmericans since before it was fashionable. Prenait la pisse hors du FrançaisCanadiens méridionaux puisqu'avant lui à la mode. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
