Conundrum 1 #1 September 24, 2004 A distraught man answered his door to find two grim-faced Alaska State Troopers. "We're sorry to call on you at this hour, Mr. Wilkens, but we have some information about your missing wife." "Tell me! Did you find her?" the man cried. The troopers looked at each other. One said, "We have some bad news, some good news, and some really great news. Which do you want to hear first?" Fearing the worse, an ashen Mr. Wilkens said, "Give me the bad news first." The trooper said, "I'm sorry to tell you, sir, but this morning we found your wife's body in Kachemak Bay." "Oh my god!" said Mr. Wilkens, overcome by emotion. "I have been hoping against hope." Swallowing hard, he asked, "What's the good news then?" The trooper continued, "When we pulled her up she had two five-pound king crabs and a half- dozen good size Dungeoness crabs on her." Stunned, Mr. Wilkens demanded, "If that's the good news, then what is the 'great news?'" The trooper said, "We're going to pull her up again tomorrow." wakka wakka *slaps knee* Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
christoofar 0 #2 September 24, 2004 Oh that's just SICK. I love it. ____________________________________________________________ I'm RICK JAMES! Fo shizzle. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
cocheese 0 #3 September 24, 2004 Thank you.Hey are you having a wonderful day ? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Frenchy68 0 #4 September 24, 2004 uh.... Thanks a lot... That was my wife!!! "For once you have tasted Absinthe you will walk the earth with your eyes turned towards the gutter, for there you have been and there you will long to return." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jumperconway 0 #5 September 24, 2004 But I'm allergic to crab damnit, do you think she'd be good for lobster???? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Zee 0 #6 September 24, 2004 Now that's funny Action©Sports Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
d_squared431 0 #7 September 24, 2004 LOLTPM Sister#130ONTIG#1 I love vodka.I love vodka cause it rhymes with Tuaca~LisaH You having a clean thought is like billyvance having a clean post.iluvtofly Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
peacefuljeffrey 0 #8 September 24, 2004 QuoteBut I'm allergic to crab damnit, do you think she'd be good for lobster???? Throw 'em in a freezer truck and drive 'er over to Maine to find out! -Jeffrey-Jeffrey "With tha thoughts of a militant mind... Hard line, hard line after hard line!" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #9 September 24, 2004 She's cold, doesn't move, and smells like crab. The sex is the same, but the dishes are piling up. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Slappie 9 #10 September 24, 2004 QuoteShe's cold, doesn't move, and smells like crab. The sex is the same, but the dishes are piling up. Thought that was only in California? "Find out just what any people will quietly submit to and you have found out the exact measure of injustice and wrong which will be imposed upon them." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #11 September 24, 2004 QuoteQuoteShe's cold, doesn't move, and smells like crab. The sex is the same, but the dishes are piling up. Thought that was only in California? It's against the law in California now. Too bad. I was thinking of opening a brothel there. Think of the advantages. - The employees are always there on their shift. - 24-hours doesn't bother them. - No sick days and holiday time is no problem. - Less than minimum wage. - Just the routine maintenance (dousing with some disinfectant.) customer: "I think she's sick, her nose is running." manager: "Jim! The one in room four is full." All together now... Ewwwwwww... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
goose491 0 #12 September 24, 2004 Bwahahaa! Thanks for the laugh girl My Karma ran over my Dogma!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ron 10 #13 September 24, 2004 QuoteMissing Wife Try adjusting for winds, or lead her a bit more."No free man shall ever be debarred the use of arms." -- Thomas Jefferson, Thomas Jefferson Papers, 334 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Zee 0 #14 September 24, 2004 QuoteQuoteMissing Wife Try adjusting for winds, or lead her a bit more. I thought that was from Platoon? Or was that Full Metal Jacket? How can you shoot women and children? It's easy, you just don't lead'em as much Action©Sports Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Slappie 9 #15 September 24, 2004 QuoteQuoteQuoteMissing Wife Try adjusting for winds, or lead her a bit more. I thought that was from Platoon? Or was that Full Metal Jacket? How can you shoot women and children? It's easy, you just don't lead'em as much I think that line comes from Full Metal Jacket... not Platoon "Find out just what any people will quietly submit to and you have found out the exact measure of injustice and wrong which will be imposed upon them." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
christoofar 0 #16 September 24, 2004 FMJ, Best 'nam movie ever! ____________________________________________________________ I'm RICK JAMES! Fo shizzle. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
YahooLV 0 #17 September 24, 2004 Does that come with a lemon or a lime sauce?http://www.curtisglennphotography.com Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
adamjenner 0 #18 September 24, 2004 Ohhh that's nasty Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
