Why I couldn't make the pub-crawl.

[mr2mk1g 10]

So... last night I drove home from work furnished with the newly purchased ingredients to a nice curry and a couple of beers. It was to take only an hour or so for me to cook up and wash down my grub with a cold one before heading out to meet some friends on a pub-crawl thingy I was invited to attend.

So into the kitchen I went to deposit my beers in the freezer. There’s nothing like a cold beer with a good curry... so it was important they were properly chilled for my meal. That’s when I saw the smoke. That’s right - white acrid smoke pouring out of the top of my washing machine.

Shit, an electrical fire! I rush over and pull the plug out of the socket... all goes quiet. I stop and listen... yup, I can hear the crackling and popping of a fire – the fucking washing machine’s on fire.

Now as none of you will have ever been to my house; my washing machine is built into an airing cupboard. If I ever wanted to remove it from it’s home I would have to unscrew 9 screws from the door, lift a tumble drier from the shelf above the washer and move it out of the way, remove a shelf on which the drier sits before even attempting to manhandle a large electrical device filled with concrete through a gap only millimetres wider than the item itself.

So there I stood; flames beginning to lick round from under the base of the washing machine and a rather monumental task in front of me before I could even think about attempting to fight the fire… it was going to require swift and deliberate action. So as would any other presented with this grim situation, I prioritised and focused on the most pressing requirements first.

I put my beer in the freezer.

Now, to quickly move to “step two” I rush upstairs and change out of my suit – that thing’s expensive... and it’s dry-clean only. Stopping only to scrape ice from the inside of the freezer door, as it wouldn’t quite shut right ensuring only partially chilled beer, I flew into action.

Out came a screwdriver and off came the door. The tumble drier was flung, careening across the kitchen floor. With the shelf out I could see the orange glow of fire from below. Fingers of flame lapped at the edges of the washer. The acrid smoke was now literally pouring out of the soap draw.

I had to access the fire somehow... it wasn’t going to fight itself. Trouble is washing machines are heavy at the best of times and I found this one now full of water having been stopped mid-cycle. It’s home was almost perfectly sized to its dimensions and at the back it was restricted by three different plumbing pipes. On top of it all it was now hot to the touch… being as it was essentially a big metal thing full of fire.

Damnit!

I tip the whole thing forward, pivoting it about its front edge. It was at this point that my secondary school science lessons sprung back to mind, back through the dim haze of years of university alcohol abuse. Fire needs two things: fuel and oxygen... lifting the washer fed it oxygen... lifting the washer meant flames spat out from below, up the sides of the washer and over my fingers. Lifting = bad.

This was going to require a re-think.

Out the back door I flew and set about the hose. Finding it dismantled as always I spent two minutes trying to fiddle with those little screw rings and adapters; finally remembering that I had to put the screw over the hose before the hose went into the adapter thingy and then have the screw bit affixed to its base. Another minute was spent selecting the appropriate spray setting on the trigger... I was aiming for the one that produced an effect most resembling that used by firemen on TV. Well they must do it like that for a reason right?

Thus armed I re-entered the fray.

Speed was now the key. The washer was tipped forward to emit the now predictable flurry of flames. Fire be damned I dove in - water flowed and smoke billowed. Fire is no match for such a mighty hose and fireman-style spray effect trigger thingy combo. Thank you B&Q: £19.99 well spent!

Its fury quenched the fire fell silent, leaving only the clunks and bangs of constricting metal within the washer. What an anticlimax. With only the finger hair of one hand singed, I was left in silence to contemplate how the hell I was now expected to produce clean underwear for the morning. That and the alarming certainty that Mr. Credit Card was going to have to be introduced to Mr. Washing Machine Sales Man and that the kitchen floor was going to have to be shown the mop once more.

I cracked open a barely chilled beer and surveyed the devastation, now resigned to the fact that I’d probably never make the pub-crawl.

[Stumpy 284]

You were going to COOK a curry? whats wrong with you man! Go for takeaway and non-specific meat!!!!

(Edited to add: Or better still - a doner kebab)

Never try to eat more than you can lift

[gordy 0]

Sounds like you would have needed a pub crawl after all that dude. Well done for getting it sorted.

[nacmacfeegle 0]

Lucky boy, you could have lost your hoose, or worse.

PM me once you have sorted out the insurance, and I'll see what we can do to provide you some more security for the future.

I do fire protection.

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He who receives an idea from me, receives instruction himself without lessening mine; as he who lights his taper at mine, receives light without darkening me. Thomas Jefferson

[mr2mk1g 10]

Damn straight I was lucky - hate to think how much damage would have been caused if no one were in. Or worse - if it had caught when on timer to come on at 4am!

My fire protection's probably going to extend to buying a new washer... I'm not about to install a sprinkler system over this... and it’s not like the fire risk isn’t there with any other electrical item in the house.

Thumb tacking a load of condoms full of water to the ceiling did briefly cross my mind though.

[nacmacfeegle 0]

"I'm not about to install a sprinkler system over this..."

Hell, I can do that for you for free, easy peasey, lemon squeazy, but PM'd anyways.

"Thumb tacking a load of condoms full of water to the ceiling did briefly cross my mind though"

I've had (alegedly) smart people suggest similar but bigger.

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He who receives an idea from me, receives instruction himself without lessening mine; as he who lights his taper at mine, receives light without darkening me. Thomas Jefferson

[Dougiefresh 0]

Don't you guys have fire extinguishers in the UK?

Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so. --Douglas Adams

[mr2mk1g 10]

Yeah I had one to hand... just I was too cheap to use it. Hose pipes don't need recharging or throwing away once used.

[Remster 30]

Quote

just I was too cheap to use it

Dude....

I mean, dude!

Get a couple of ABC extinguishers....

Remster

[mr2mk1g 10]

I have - they're there if I need em.

But as I indicated - the fire was small and contained. It could not spread and was being watched over by someone with an extinguisher in hand. I simply explored a cheaper alternative as I had the luxury of time.

[Remster 30]

Its all insight now of course, but did you disconnect the breakers? If not (you dont mention it) then you used water around some electrical outlets...

Either way, glad it turned out well for ya!

Remster

[mr2mk1g 10]

Power points were at head height - I had them installed at that point when I converted the cupboard as there's plumbing in there.

There's also an isolation switch outside the cupboard that I clean forgot about at the time and only remembered this avo when Nac pointed its usefulness out in a PM.

Your right though that could have been an issue had they been lower. I didn't consider it at the time... I can't honestly say if I would have or not were the outlets lower - it's all hindsight. Perhaps I would have twigged and used the powder extinguisher?

I doubt I would have opted for the hose if it wasn't in an area that has often been flooded in the past anyway though. I doubt you'd stop to worry about water and power outlets when you'd been stood up to your ancles in water in that very spot only a week before.