RoysPlayThing 0 #1 February 22, 2005 Bad Alcohol!! I'm never drinking again! ... anyone else say this over, and over again? P.S. Wanna join me for a drink later? Edited to say.. "Quit PMing me with drink dates, I was kidding" _______________________________________________ My mind is like a parachute...it functions only when open. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Peej 0 #2 February 22, 2005 Lord, if you let me... (insert ralphing sounds here)... stop...vomi...(insert ralphing sounds here)...ting...i'll never do this...(insert ralphing sounds here)...again! Said that one a few times Advertisio Rodriguez / Sky Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RoysPlayThing 0 #3 February 22, 2005 Quote Lord, if you let me... (insert ralphing sounds here)... stop...vomi...(insert ralphing sounds here)...ting...i'll never do this...(insert ralphing sounds here)...again! Said that one a few times OMG! That sounds so familiar!! _______________________________________________ My mind is like a parachute...it functions only when open. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bolas 5 #4 February 22, 2005 Don't forget: (Barely audible) And... this... time... I mean it!!! (Crash to the floor) Stupidity if left untreated is self-correcting If ya can't be good, look good, if that fails, make 'em laugh. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ChrisL 2 #5 February 22, 2005 I said that 9 years ago and I've lived up to it so far __ My mighty steed Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
masterrig 1 #6 February 22, 2005 Great going! 8-yrs. for me! Chuck Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BRYANGOESBOOM 0 #7 February 22, 2005 Its all about control some people have it and i puke on the carpet Not only will you look better, feel better, and fuck better; you'll have significantly increased your life expectancy. --Douva Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RoysPlayThing 0 #8 February 22, 2005 QuoteI said that 9 years ago and I've lived up to it so far Nice! Good for you ... _______________________________________________ My mind is like a parachute...it functions only when open. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ChrisL 2 #9 February 22, 2005 QuoteGreat going! 8-yrs. for me! Chuck 4 years off the cigarettes for me. I'm almost out of vices. Good thing for SEX eh??__ My mighty steed Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
christoofar 0 #10 February 22, 2005 QuoteBad Alcohol!! I'm never drinking again! ... anyone else say this over, and over again? P.S. Wanna join me for a drink later? Edited to say.. "Quit PMing me with drink dates, I was kidding" What will I drink if I stop drinking? I have more mixers and Jagermeister in my house than I have milk. ____________________________________________________________ I'm RICK JAMES! Fo shizzle. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
masterrig 1 #11 February 22, 2005 You bet! The really bad part was, I quit smoking and drinking on the same day! I'll bet, I was un-bearable to my wife! Probably, still am. Every physical I've had since, have shown the lungs, liver, kidneys, etc. are fine. Keep-up the good work! Chuck Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RoysPlayThing 0 #12 February 22, 2005 QuoteQuoteBad Alcohol!! I'm never drinking again! ... anyone else say this over, and over again? P.S. Wanna join me for a drink later? Edited to say.. "Quit PMing me with drink dates, I was kidding" What will I drink if I stop drinking? QuoteI have more mixers and Jagermeister in my house than I have milk. huh??? ... Are you crazy?? Don't you know milk does a body good? _______________________________________________ My mind is like a parachute...it functions only when open. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites TypicalFish 0 #13 February 22, 2005 QuoteBad Alcohol!! I'm never drinking again! ... anyone else say this over, and over again? P.S. Wanna join me for a drink later? I wish I had the restraint to treat my body like a temple; I am seemingly stuck in this endless cycle of using it as an amusement park..."I gargle no man's balls..." ussfpa on SOCNET Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites MarkM 0 #14 February 22, 2005 QuoteBad Alcohol!! I'm never drinking again! ... anyone else say this over, and over again? Yeah, and I don't drink "bad" alcohol anymore Why drink cat piss tequilla when a couple of shots of Patron will get you buzzing. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites NWFlyer 2 #15 February 22, 2005 Just got this via e-mail today and it made me think of this post: Dear Alcohol, First & foremost, let me tell you that I'm a huge fan of yours. My friend, you always seem to be there when needed. The perfect post-work cocktail, a beer with the game, and you're even around in the holiday's hidden inside chocolates as you warm us when we're stuck in the midst of endless family gatherings. However, lately I've been wondering about your intentions. While I want to believe that you have my best interests at heart, I feel that your influence has led to some unwise consequences, briefed below for your review. 1. Phone calls: While I agree with you that communication is important, I question the suggestion that any conversation of substance or necessity takes place after 2 a.m. Why would you make me call those ex-boyfriends/girlfriends when I know for a fact they do not want to hear from me during the day, let alone all hours of the night? 2. Eating: Now, you know I love a good meal, but why do you suggest that I eat a kabob with chili sauce, along with a big Italian hoagie & some stale chips (washed down with chocolate Nesquik & topped off with a Kit Kat all after a few cheese curls & chili cheese fries)? I'm an eclectic eater, but I think you went too far this time. 3. Clumsiness: Unless you're subtly trying to tell me that I need to do more yoga to improve my balance, I see NO need to hammer the issue home by causing me to fall down. It's completely unnecessary, and the black & blue marks that appear on my body mysteriously the next day is beyond me. Similarly, it should never take me more than 45 seconds to get the front door key into the lock. 4. Pictures: This can be a blessing in disguise, as it can often clarify the last point below, but the following costumes are banned from ever being placed on my head in public again: Indian wigs, sombreros, bows, ties, boxes, upside-down cups, inflatable balloon animals, traffic cones, or bras. Also, what is with you making me take pictures with people I clearly don't like when I'm sober? Yet they suddenly become my best friends when a flash is presented? 5. Beer goggles: If I think I may know him/her from somewhere, I most likely do not. Please do not request that I go over & see if in fact, I do actually know that person. The phrase "let's F***" is illegal from now on. While I may be thinking this, please reinstate the brain-to-mouth-block that would stop this thought from becoming a statement, especially in public. Please stop me from talking to the guy/girl with the crooked teeth; acned-up face; bad breath; beer belly, etc. Why are they so appealing to me while I'm with you & why are they so disgusting to me the next morning after you have worn off?? 6. Furthermore: The hangovers have GOT to stop. This is getting ridiculous. I know a little penance for our previous evening's debauchery may be in order, but the 3pm hangover immobility is completely unacceptable. My entire day is shot. I ask that, if the proper precautions are taken (water, vitamin B, bread products, aspirin) prior to going to bed/passing out face-down on the kitchen floor with a bag of popcorn, the hangover should be minimal & in no way interfere with my daily activities. Alcohol, I have enjoyed our friendship for some years now & would like to ensure that we remain on good terms. You've been the invoker of great stories, the provocation for much laughter, and the needed companion when I just don't know what to do with the extra money in my pockets. In order to continue this friendship, I ask that you carefully review my grievances above & address them immediately. I will look for an answer no later than Thursday 3pm (pre-happy hour) on your possible solutions & hopefully we can continue this fruitful partnership. Thank you from, Your biggest fan P.S. THINGS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK: 1. Innovative 2. Preliminary 3. Proliferation 4. Cinnamon THINGS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK: 1. Specificity 2. British Constitution 3. Passive-aggressive disorder THINGS THAT ARE DOWNRIGHT IMPOSSIBLE TO SAY WHEN DRUNK: 1. Thanks, but I don't want to have sex. 2. Nope, no more beer for me. 3. Sorry, but you're not really my type. 4. Good evening, officer. Isn't it lovely out tonight? 5. Oh, I couldn't. No one wants to hear me sing."There is only one basic human right, the right to do as you damn well please. And with it comes the only basic human duty, the duty to take the consequences." -P.J. O'Rourke Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites RoysPlayThing 0 #16 February 22, 2005 _______________________________________________ My mind is like a parachute...it functions only when open. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Peej 0 #17 February 23, 2005 QuoteQuoteI wish I had the restraint to treat my body like a temple; I am seemingly stuck in this endless cycle of using it as an amusement park... That's brilliant! I've just mailed it out to my friends who like to party as a quote of the day. Advertisio Rodriguez / Sky Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Join the conversation You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account. Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible. Reply to this topic... × Pasted as rich text. Paste as plain text instead Only 75 emoji are allowed. × Your link has been automatically embedded. Display as a link instead × Your previous content has been restored. Clear editor × You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL. Insert image from URL × Desktop Tablet Phone Submit Reply 0 Go To Topic Listing
TypicalFish 0 #13 February 22, 2005 QuoteBad Alcohol!! I'm never drinking again! ... anyone else say this over, and over again? P.S. Wanna join me for a drink later? I wish I had the restraint to treat my body like a temple; I am seemingly stuck in this endless cycle of using it as an amusement park..."I gargle no man's balls..." ussfpa on SOCNET Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
MarkM 0 #14 February 22, 2005 QuoteBad Alcohol!! I'm never drinking again! ... anyone else say this over, and over again? Yeah, and I don't drink "bad" alcohol anymore Why drink cat piss tequilla when a couple of shots of Patron will get you buzzing. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NWFlyer 2 #15 February 22, 2005 Just got this via e-mail today and it made me think of this post: Dear Alcohol, First & foremost, let me tell you that I'm a huge fan of yours. My friend, you always seem to be there when needed. The perfect post-work cocktail, a beer with the game, and you're even around in the holiday's hidden inside chocolates as you warm us when we're stuck in the midst of endless family gatherings. However, lately I've been wondering about your intentions. While I want to believe that you have my best interests at heart, I feel that your influence has led to some unwise consequences, briefed below for your review. 1. Phone calls: While I agree with you that communication is important, I question the suggestion that any conversation of substance or necessity takes place after 2 a.m. Why would you make me call those ex-boyfriends/girlfriends when I know for a fact they do not want to hear from me during the day, let alone all hours of the night? 2. Eating: Now, you know I love a good meal, but why do you suggest that I eat a kabob with chili sauce, along with a big Italian hoagie & some stale chips (washed down with chocolate Nesquik & topped off with a Kit Kat all after a few cheese curls & chili cheese fries)? I'm an eclectic eater, but I think you went too far this time. 3. Clumsiness: Unless you're subtly trying to tell me that I need to do more yoga to improve my balance, I see NO need to hammer the issue home by causing me to fall down. It's completely unnecessary, and the black & blue marks that appear on my body mysteriously the next day is beyond me. Similarly, it should never take me more than 45 seconds to get the front door key into the lock. 4. Pictures: This can be a blessing in disguise, as it can often clarify the last point below, but the following costumes are banned from ever being placed on my head in public again: Indian wigs, sombreros, bows, ties, boxes, upside-down cups, inflatable balloon animals, traffic cones, or bras. Also, what is with you making me take pictures with people I clearly don't like when I'm sober? Yet they suddenly become my best friends when a flash is presented? 5. Beer goggles: If I think I may know him/her from somewhere, I most likely do not. Please do not request that I go over & see if in fact, I do actually know that person. The phrase "let's F***" is illegal from now on. While I may be thinking this, please reinstate the brain-to-mouth-block that would stop this thought from becoming a statement, especially in public. Please stop me from talking to the guy/girl with the crooked teeth; acned-up face; bad breath; beer belly, etc. Why are they so appealing to me while I'm with you & why are they so disgusting to me the next morning after you have worn off?? 6. Furthermore: The hangovers have GOT to stop. This is getting ridiculous. I know a little penance for our previous evening's debauchery may be in order, but the 3pm hangover immobility is completely unacceptable. My entire day is shot. I ask that, if the proper precautions are taken (water, vitamin B, bread products, aspirin) prior to going to bed/passing out face-down on the kitchen floor with a bag of popcorn, the hangover should be minimal & in no way interfere with my daily activities. Alcohol, I have enjoyed our friendship for some years now & would like to ensure that we remain on good terms. You've been the invoker of great stories, the provocation for much laughter, and the needed companion when I just don't know what to do with the extra money in my pockets. In order to continue this friendship, I ask that you carefully review my grievances above & address them immediately. I will look for an answer no later than Thursday 3pm (pre-happy hour) on your possible solutions & hopefully we can continue this fruitful partnership. Thank you from, Your biggest fan P.S. THINGS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK: 1. Innovative 2. Preliminary 3. Proliferation 4. Cinnamon THINGS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK: 1. Specificity 2. British Constitution 3. Passive-aggressive disorder THINGS THAT ARE DOWNRIGHT IMPOSSIBLE TO SAY WHEN DRUNK: 1. Thanks, but I don't want to have sex. 2. Nope, no more beer for me. 3. Sorry, but you're not really my type. 4. Good evening, officer. Isn't it lovely out tonight? 5. Oh, I couldn't. No one wants to hear me sing."There is only one basic human right, the right to do as you damn well please. And with it comes the only basic human duty, the duty to take the consequences." -P.J. O'Rourke Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RoysPlayThing 0 #16 February 22, 2005 _______________________________________________ My mind is like a parachute...it functions only when open. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Peej 0 #17 February 23, 2005 QuoteQuoteI wish I had the restraint to treat my body like a temple; I am seemingly stuck in this endless cycle of using it as an amusement park... That's brilliant! I've just mailed it out to my friends who like to party as a quote of the day. Advertisio Rodriguez / Sky Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Join the conversation You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account. Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible. Reply to this topic... × Pasted as rich text. Paste as plain text instead Only 75 emoji are allowed. × Your link has been automatically embedded. Display as a link instead × Your previous content has been restored. Clear editor × You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL. Insert image from URL × Desktop Tablet Phone Submit Reply 0
