abs equals ass?

[happythoughts 0]

I was talking to this girl and she sneezed... and farted.

Anyway, she explained that she has been working on her abs and they are mucho tight. She does 4 sets of 50 crunches every day. 2 sets morning and evening. Very solid.

As normal, when she sneezes, her abs contract really tightly... and she can't fight the high-pressure gas.

Do you think she made up that excuse?
It sounds like a tough future...
I mean, think of business meetings. She is in sales, meets a lot of people each day.

"Hello... pleased to meet you... ha-choo... pfffft"

[AggieDave 6]

I've sneeze-farted before, as well as the cough-fart, the strain-fart, the martial arts stretching-fart, the farting while doing deadlifts as well as benchpress and squats.

Many things can and will force a fart.

Atleast usually with a sneeze fart, I sneeze kinda loud and it'll cover the noise.

--"When I die, may I be surrounded by scattered chrome and burning gasoline."

[justinb138 0]

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Do you think she made up that excuse?

I dunno, it's happened to me before (very rarely though), and she is undoubtedly in better shape than I am.

Does it happen every time she sneezes?

[happythoughts 0]

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Does it happen every time she sneezes?

Hard to say. After the first one, I thought we should avoid dusty areas until the initial embarrassment faded.

Like AD, I've had martial arts stretching farts because of the left-right-leaning stretch. I think it moves the air through your system. However, I quietly disguised those and blamed it on someone else. I am now mature enough to claim them.

One day, when we are strolling through the mall, I'll step into "Bed, Bath, and Beyond". That should be good for 6 or 7 well-timed sneezes.

Either that or the Victoria Secret perfume aisle.

[weegegirl 2]

haha... she sounds funny... and a quick thinker too. mad props.

[happythoughts 0]

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haha... she sounds funny... and a quick thinker too. mad props.

Yeah. Funny and smart. Ya gotta like that.

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[RkyMtnHigh 0]

ROTFLMAO...Bill! I luv ya man and that shit is OFF THE HOOK FUNNNNNAAY as helll***Snort laughing my ass off**(um yeah that's a good thang)


(BTW Bill...if this is your lame-ass-way of bringing me out...YOU SUCK and will pay the price next time I see you) Tackle ...tackle...

_________________________________________

[QuickDraw 0]

I'm pretty sure there is a formula to it, the sneeze & fart should be equal (or there abouts) in duration,
any longer than the sneeze means she's just plain showing off.

-- Hope you don't die. --

I'm fucking winning

[Brains 2]

Now i am curious, do you fart when you snort laugh??

Never look down on someone, unless they are going down on you.

[ACMESkydiver 0]

Sounds perfectly legit. Healthy people usually eat more fibrous veggies that produce gas anyhoo...

I guess ya can't have it all...suffer to look good, and you'll have gas issues. Poor girl. At least she sounds like she has a strong enough self-image not to be too overly embarrassed about it.

~Jaye
Do not believe that possibly you can escape the reward of your action.

[jtval 0]

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Now i am curious, do you fart when you snort laugh??

a funnier question is does she snort after she farts?
(just making sure nothings broken via the smell test)

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[GeordieSkydiver 0]

I sneezed green goop once, farted and shit my pants.

I was ill though.

Or maybe drunk, I forget.

Lee _______________________________

In a world full of people, only some want to fly, is that not crazy?
http://www.ukskydiver.co.uk

[happythoughts 0]

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I sneezed green goop once, farted and shit my pants.

I was ill though.

Or maybe drunk, I forget.

Illness is another scenario.

Having the flu and diarrhea doesn't count. People with the flu can be trying to barf in the sink while simulaneously trying to hit the toilet with the Mt. St. Helens eruption.

Of course, if you have a sink separated from the toilet area by a door, you are rapidly turning while trying to hit the toilet with both. This is known as the "sprinkler effect".

[GeordieSkydiver 0]

I also once bent over to pick something up and filled my boxers.

I was just recovering from foot poisoning and had NO bowel control.

The 20 yard journey down the shared corridoor to the bathroom at 6am was one of the longest walks of my life. And a whole other story.

Lee _______________________________

In a world full of people, only some want to fly, is that not crazy?
http://www.ukskydiver.co.uk

[kallend 2,150]

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I've sneeze-farted before, as well as the cough-fart, the strain-fart, the martial arts stretching-fart, the farting while doing deadlifts as well as benchpress and squats.

Many things can and will force a fart.

Atleast usually with a sneeze fart, I sneeze kinda loud and it'll cover the noise.

Thanks for the information. Definitely changed my image of you.

...

The only sure way to survive a canopy collision is not to have one.