Candy 0 #1 March 27, 2005 My husband is afraid of spiders. We live out in the country and every spring and summer we get these big narly white ones, ugly, not from this world kind of freaky looking. Big thick white bodies with short stocky white legs, their fast and make the strongest webs I've ever seen. The other night I was in the shower when my husband ran into the bathroom, quite panicked, I could seen through the shower door that he was checking himself out thoroughly in the full length mirror. Checking his back, shoulders, back of his neck, back of his legs and he pulled out the back of his shirt and was shaking it out. He finally calmed down a little and started walking toward the shower, I could still hear the terror in his voice as he started to describe his run in with "one of those things". So I opened up the shower door to talk to him (and being mean, as I am) I looked right at his collar bone and went....Awe!!! Oh my Ga.....and that was it, he flipped out! He started running around that bath room like some kind of wild banshee, jumping up and down, flipping back and forth, arms flailing, hitting himself in the head, the back, the stomach, all the while making these high-pitched squeeling screaming sounds, like nothing I've ever heard come out of him. It was F*@king Hilarious (i'm still laughing). Needless to say, I was almost drowned that night, but to me......it was worth it!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
swedishcelt 0 #2 March 27, 2005 Turning the he-men into screaming girlies is always big fun. Good one. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
leroydb 0 #3 March 27, 2005 now only if you had video....!Leroy ..I knew I was an unwanted baby when I saw my bath toys were a toaster and a radio... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RoadRash 0 #4 March 27, 2005 Ok, this one gets a thumbs up...... Nice...... ~R+R...~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ Fly the friendly skies...^_^...})ii({...^_~... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
popsjumper 2 #5 March 27, 2005 QuoteOk, this one gets a thumbs up...... Nice...... ~R+R... Yeah...but don't DO that again!!!!!! Poor guy...I can relate..only my thing is snakes....My reality and yours are quite different. I think we're all Bozos on this bus. Falcon5232, SCS8170, SCSA353, POPS9398, DS239 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
masterrig 1 #6 March 27, 2005 You're just like my wife! She's mean too! But, it's sooo damned funny. Chuck Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Conundrum 1 #7 March 27, 2005 bwuahhahahahahhaha! I can totally picture that because that's EXCATLY what I would do it there was a spider on me Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Candy 0 #8 March 27, 2005 Pretty funny huh, He didn't think so, He swears he's gonna make me EAT one of those things. Maybe you'll read about it in my next post Candy Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
masterrig 1 #9 March 27, 2005 Hey! Your very own 'Fear Factor'! Chuck Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
hooked 0 #10 March 27, 2005 Too funny! Thanks for the laugh! It was fun, wasn't it? J -------------------------------------- Sometimes we're just being Humans.....But we're always Human Beings. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bobsled92 0 #11 March 27, 2005 QuoteTurning the he-men into screaming girlies is always big fun. Good one. HA! I like spiders and snakes taste GREAT! (I always have to get ride of them for "others") It is funny though. To see the MOST dangerous creature on Earth....afraid of little spiders(Or big hairy ones) ....and if you hear me get concerned about seeing a "hairy spider" on you girls.......it's time to concider shaving more often_______________________________ If I could be a Super Hero, I chose to be: "GRANT-A-CLAUS". and work 365 days a Year. http://www.hangout.no/speednews/ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bodypilot1 0 #12 March 27, 2005 Quotenow only if you had video....! You mean of her in the ....uh....shower......right? Be safe. Edwww.WestCoastWingsuits.com www.PrecisionSkydiving.com Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Keith 0 #13 March 27, 2005 We've never met, but I Like You already Once, when my ex wasn't an ex yet, he bought a very expensive mixer called a VitaMixer. He pulled it out right away, cleaned it, and started making smoothies - his Absolute Favorite. Instead of having tines that connected the motor to the blade, it had magnets. On a label on the front of the mixer read, "When reversing polarity, sparks under this appliance are normal." Well Paul still didn't like the sparks, and he made the mistake of telling me. Each time he'd reverse polarity, he'd tense a little more, click - Spark - Tense, click - Spark - Tense, click - Spark - Tense, he just got more and more tense with each click - Spark. I couldn't take it anymore, so as he clicked and the machine sparked I yelled B A N G!!! He jumed so high and screamed so loud. I expected a reaction, but not like the one I got. I lauged till I cried. He was so mad I nearly wore the mixer. Keith Don't Fuck with me Keith - J. Mandeville Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
leroydb 0 #14 March 27, 2005 [evil grin] yes [/evil grin]Leroy ..I knew I was an unwanted baby when I saw my bath toys were a toaster and a radio... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ltdiver 3 #15 March 27, 2005 Quotehe just got more and more tense with each click - Spark. I couldn't take it anymore, so as he clicked and the machine sparked I yelled B A N G!!! He jumed so high and screamed so loud. Keith, I -knew- you were one of us! Thanks for the laugh this morning!! ltdiver Don't tell me the sky's the limit when there are footprints on the moon Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
windcatcher 0 #16 March 27, 2005 thanks for giving windcatcher an idea Mother to the cutest little thing in the world... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest #18 March 27, 2005 I don't know why but I was expecting this thread to involve a cattle-prod. Maybe scream like a girl means different things to different people ... eewww that's not what I meant ... You can have it good, fast, or cheap: pick two. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jenfly00 0 #19 March 27, 2005 QuoteMy husband is afraid of spiders. We live out in the country and every spring and summer we get these big narly white ones, ugly, not from this world kind of freaky looking. Big thick white bodies with short stocky white legs, their fast and make the strongest webs I've ever seen. The other night I was in the shower when my husband ran into the bathroom, quite panicked, I could seen through the shower door that he was checking himself out thoroughly in the full length mirror. Checking his back, shoulders, back of his neck, back of his legs and he pulled out the back of his shirt and was shaking it out. He finally calmed down a little and started walking toward the shower, I could still hear the terror in his voice as he started to describe his run in with "one of those things". So I opened up the shower door to talk to him (and being mean, as I am) I looked right at his collar bone and went....Awe!!! Oh my Ga.....and that was it, he flipped out! He started running around that bath room like some kind of wild banshee, jumping up and down, flipping back and forth, arms flailing, hitting himself in the head, the back, the stomach, all the while making these high-pitched squeeling screaming sounds, like nothing I've ever heard come out of him. It was F*@king Hilarious (i'm still laughing). Needless to say, I was almost drowned that night, but to me......it was worth it!! I've been on the receiving end of that. It's pretty funny ...after. I have no problem with spiders as long as they behave appropriately and stay in their webs. Skies, Jen----------------------- "O brave new world that has such people in it". Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #20 March 28, 2005 My ex had watched one of those pointless "Men are the spawn of Satan" movies on tv where the man beats his wife. She came into the library and said me, "don't those women realize that men are defenseless when they are asleep?" I was just wondering two things. - Has your husband ever noticed whether you sleep with your mouth open or not? - Do you think he could find a really squirmy roach? Pleasant dreams. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Keith 0 #21 March 28, 2005 QuoteKeith, I -knew- you were one of us! Thanks for the laugh this morning!! Sometime I'll have to tell you some of the other things we did to each other. Our sick senses of humor kept us together for 7 years We still like to pull shit on each other Keith Don't Fuck with me Keith - J. Mandeville Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Candy 0 #22 March 28, 2005 Quote I was just wondering two things. - Has your husband ever noticed whether you sleep with your mouth open or not? - Do you think he could find a really squirmy roach? Pleasant dreams. HappyThoughts, C'mon man, whos side are you on anyway? He is a non-jumper you know (don't know if that makes any difference to you are not, just thought I'd throw it out there, just in case). Besides that, he's getting the last laugh. He knows, that I know, he'll get the one-up, so all I can do now is wait. Don't know when, don't know how.....but I do know that I don't have to worry about him feeding me one of those things, because he's too freaking scared of them...hee hee hee. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #23 March 29, 2005 This is all theoretical for me. I am too kind and considerate to play pranks like these. My ex was the worlds most accurate roach smacker because she was so afraid of them. She was terrified at the thought that she might miss and it would fly at her. I spackled a wall impact crater more than once. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JohnnyD 0 #24 March 29, 2005 QuoteWe still like to pull shit on each other Dude, thats about an 8.5 on the unintentional humor scale. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Keith 0 #25 March 29, 2005 Guess I should have said 'stunts' on each other Keith Don't Fuck with me Keith - J. Mandeville Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
