chaoskitty 0 #1 May 21, 2005 well.. being mostly drunk doesnt help.. but seven months later .. I miss my friend so much. This is just a moment of weakness. I know that my pain is NOTHING compared to his family's... and what I feel is mostly for them. If I could never see him again, but he could come back for them I would be happy every day for the rest of my life. I dont know if I'm asking for support, or reassurance that everything will be okay, or if just typing it out is cathartic for me. I just know that a lot of you can relate to what I am feeling. I was blessed to have him in my life, but losing him has left a huge void and I miss my friend. Thanks for listening. I pray every day that he is with us and we will see him again. If nothing else, losing Chris has made me value my family and friends so much more and take none of them for granted. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mnealtx 0 #2 May 21, 2005 *giving the kitty a big e-hug* No, it's not a moment of weakness. There's nothing weak in regretting the loss of someone near to you. Just remember that he's not really gone...not as long as you remember him and hold him near to your heart. He's not gone...just "away" for a while....Mike I love you, Shannon and Jim. POPS 9708 , SCR 14706 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
chaoskitty 0 #3 May 21, 2005 Thanks, Mike. What time is it in_ where are you? Actually I think that I do need to realize that he is gone. He will never check the spot with me again. He will never put a birdman suit on with me. He will never smile at me across a 4-way again. He is with me on every jump but its just not the same. Its very different. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
hookitt 1 #4 May 21, 2005 Ah Kristi, you're a jewel. Chris was a lucky man and so was his family and friends. There's always the random rough times when we remember our friends and have a good cry. You know he smiles down on us and would want you to smile too. So cry... smile, cry some more... but remember that grin of his :) and keep it with you. Let yourself have peace. Breathe...My grammar sometimes resembles that of magnetic refrigerator poetry... Ghetto Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mnealtx 0 #5 May 21, 2005 It's 10:30am in Central Europe I understand what you mean...you wish with all your heart that he was still there to do all those things with you...and there's NOTHING wrong with that. But...don't cry for HIM...he's in a much, much better place now. Cry for yourself, that you miss him not being here anymore...Mike I love you, Shannon and Jim. POPS 9708 , SCR 14706 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
chaoskitty 0 #6 May 21, 2005 Thanks, Tim. I know that you miss him too. And for the record, you and Brittany are two people that I feel blessed to have in my life. I value your friendships and love you both very much. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
freeflir29 0 #7 May 21, 2005 Chris was a great guy. Just one of those people you meet and instantly like. He certainly is missed but I'm sure he wouldn't want you to be sad. Smile......and treasure the time that you did get. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites mouth 0 #8 May 21, 2005 Hugs little one. Now I understand the phone call last night. I'm sorry I was dealing with my youngests birthday party and couldn't talk but i promise we will catch up soon since school is now officially out. Know that it is ok to miss friends and even to cry at times. I still have a picture of Michelle and I on my end table taken the week before she was killed. I still think back to the weekend we had planned that got turned from fun to a funeral. It's ok to remember and miss all that could have been. Remember we start dying as soon as we are born so it isn't a matter of if but when. Chris lived a good life and touched many people. He wouldn't want you to be sad for him because he died doing something he loved. Lovin' you lots. -- Hot Mama At least you know where you stand even if it is in a pile of shit. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites cocheese 0 #9 May 21, 2005 I'm going to jump today for all of those who have passed before us who would say "less work, more play."Something doesn't feel right today.Something is telling me not to work, but go have fun. And if i die today, at least i was living. Living the dream.It's going to be OK Kristy.Your heart is functioning properly.Thanking the angels for our blue sky. It's a perfect day to fly with them. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites ChasingBlueSky 0 #10 May 21, 2005 Losing a friend is never easy. Even if they move away you feel loss. Never being able to pick up the phone and call them again.....well, no one has a good answer on how to get past that. Everyone heals and moves on at their own pace. I've found that the amount of pain from the loss is directly connected to how strong a friendship it was. The sad part is, you are never quite the same in the end, even when you do heal. There will always be that little part of your life that is missing. But...will you let the end of the journey with them dominate your feelings/thoughts of them? You had a great friend, and have good memories of him. The good of the journey should outweigh the impact of the loss....eventually...once you get past the initial pain. Also, do you think Chris would want you hurting because of him? How would he best want you to remember him and honor him? Hang in there Kristi....it gets better eventually. I promise._________________________________________ you can burn the land and boil the sea, but you can't take the sky from me.... I WILL fly again..... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Casie 0 #11 May 21, 2005 It's ok to cry - as you've told me a many a times. I never got the opportunity to meet this wonderful person, but I feel I have with all the good things you've said of him and his family. Treasure the times you did spend together and never forget the memories - there, he'll be in your heart forever.~Porn Kitty WARNING: Goldschlager causes extreme emotional outbursts! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Amazon 7 #12 May 21, 2005 I only got to meet Chris a couple times at boogies... and we had a wonderful conversation when he gave me a ride back to the airport. I had a long chat with him after my reserve ride oin a raven... and got the newer one based on another long conversation... I miss him too.. He was definitely one of the good guys who you could learn so much about the sport from. Anyone who met him just knew..that he was a gentleman.. soft spoken and thoughtfull. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites hookitt 1 #13 May 21, 2005 You're welcome :) We love you too. Are you hungover today? If so, I bet Chris is laughing at you (Shades on the smiley to keep the light out)My grammar sometimes resembles that of magnetic refrigerator poetry... Ghetto Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites shananay 0 #14 May 21, 2005 Ahhh darling Christy my heart reaches out to you and I feel your pain. Oh how I wish it weren't this way but I feel your pain, ALL of it. It's coming up on one year since the most beautiful soul I think I have ever known, left us. Nate..even now when I say his name and think back to the good times, it makes my throat swell up and my stomach ache. I can't say anything that you don't already know...it has it's moments, ups and downs, and some days are still as gut-wrenching as the day it all happened. Breathe sweety, you have to breathe and let the pain flow through you, remember all the love and laughter that he shared with you, lean on your friends. God, lean on your friends. Girl, you and I are two very lucky and truly blessed people because we were able to share the most special moments and have such beautiful friendships with two amazing men..never to be forgotten. Hell I don't want to forget! I love you Christy! Breathe...one day, so they say, it will be a bit more bearable..one day.. <<<<<((((Big hugs))))>>>>> Do it Again! P.M.S. #22 LaLa Gang #4 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Salsa_John 0 #15 May 22, 2005 Smile and your sky buds smile with you... I am missing Gus.. "You did what?!?!" MUFF #3722, TDSM #72, Orfun #26, Nachos Rodriguez Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites chaoskitty 0 #16 May 23, 2005 Hey everybody.. thank you SO MUCH for your responses, encouragement, and love. Its not often that I get so upset anymore but sometimes, yes. And when it hits, its overwhelming. Each of your responses was helpful and meaningful. Thank you. Ended today with a tracking dive and felt Chris with me the whole time. Everything is OK now. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites RkyMtnHigh 0 #17 May 23, 2005 I totatally understand. Greiving has no timeline. Allow yourself to grieve. Cherish those wonderful moments and memories and know they are still here with you in spirit. they fly with you on every jump and know that one day you will rejoin again...in the most kickass dz ever. I look forward to that day when we all have our ultimate dz and we jump 24/7 and share the best of the best. "here" is temporary for us to "learn" and live our "purpose"...once we have fulfilled that purpose, it's time to "go"...at that time, we've fulfilled our "mission" here... He fulfilled his purpose and made significant impact on so many lives...fly with Chris..he's with you in spirit on every jump _________________________________________ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Peej 0 #18 May 23, 2005 It hasn't been a year since i met Chris for the first time at WFFC 2004 but i think of the time that i got to spend with him often. He was one of the most amazing people i have ever had the pleasure of knowing and i miss chatting to him via email. My thoughts and prayers are with you and with his family. My first wing suit flight in my home country this weekend will be dedicated to the man himself. Advertisio Rodriguez / Sky Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Dougjumper 0 #19 May 23, 2005 I feel Chris kicking my Ass along with Kent because I miss these guys so damn much. I can always hear him saying Doug.. your developing into a good skydiver keep up the Bird-man stuff and fly that Xaos more often and Pack Pack Pack Pack. Get out early stay late with me his exact words. His teaching me from Aff all the way through will always be with me. His words his Jokes his endurance etc. I feel he will be with me on every Jump talking to me softly. Damn what a Cool Person and Kent Damn Cool instructor as well. Peace Brothers...Be Strong Kristi with me.. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Join the conversation You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account. Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible. Reply to this topic... × Pasted as rich text. Paste as plain text instead Only 75 emoji are allowed. × Your link has been automatically embedded. Display as a link instead × Your previous content has been restored. Clear editor × You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL. Insert image from URL × Desktop Tablet Phone Submit Reply 0 Go To Topic Listing
mouth 0 #8 May 21, 2005 Hugs little one. Now I understand the phone call last night. I'm sorry I was dealing with my youngests birthday party and couldn't talk but i promise we will catch up soon since school is now officially out. Know that it is ok to miss friends and even to cry at times. I still have a picture of Michelle and I on my end table taken the week before she was killed. I still think back to the weekend we had planned that got turned from fun to a funeral. It's ok to remember and miss all that could have been. Remember we start dying as soon as we are born so it isn't a matter of if but when. Chris lived a good life and touched many people. He wouldn't want you to be sad for him because he died doing something he loved. Lovin' you lots. -- Hot Mama At least you know where you stand even if it is in a pile of shit. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
cocheese 0 #9 May 21, 2005 I'm going to jump today for all of those who have passed before us who would say "less work, more play."Something doesn't feel right today.Something is telling me not to work, but go have fun. And if i die today, at least i was living. Living the dream.It's going to be OK Kristy.Your heart is functioning properly.Thanking the angels for our blue sky. It's a perfect day to fly with them. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ChasingBlueSky 0 #10 May 21, 2005 Losing a friend is never easy. Even if they move away you feel loss. Never being able to pick up the phone and call them again.....well, no one has a good answer on how to get past that. Everyone heals and moves on at their own pace. I've found that the amount of pain from the loss is directly connected to how strong a friendship it was. The sad part is, you are never quite the same in the end, even when you do heal. There will always be that little part of your life that is missing. But...will you let the end of the journey with them dominate your feelings/thoughts of them? You had a great friend, and have good memories of him. The good of the journey should outweigh the impact of the loss....eventually...once you get past the initial pain. Also, do you think Chris would want you hurting because of him? How would he best want you to remember him and honor him? Hang in there Kristi....it gets better eventually. I promise._________________________________________ you can burn the land and boil the sea, but you can't take the sky from me.... I WILL fly again..... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Casie 0 #11 May 21, 2005 It's ok to cry - as you've told me a many a times. I never got the opportunity to meet this wonderful person, but I feel I have with all the good things you've said of him and his family. Treasure the times you did spend together and never forget the memories - there, he'll be in your heart forever.~Porn Kitty WARNING: Goldschlager causes extreme emotional outbursts! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Amazon 7 #12 May 21, 2005 I only got to meet Chris a couple times at boogies... and we had a wonderful conversation when he gave me a ride back to the airport. I had a long chat with him after my reserve ride oin a raven... and got the newer one based on another long conversation... I miss him too.. He was definitely one of the good guys who you could learn so much about the sport from. Anyone who met him just knew..that he was a gentleman.. soft spoken and thoughtfull. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
hookitt 1 #13 May 21, 2005 You're welcome :) We love you too. Are you hungover today? If so, I bet Chris is laughing at you (Shades on the smiley to keep the light out)My grammar sometimes resembles that of magnetic refrigerator poetry... Ghetto Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shananay 0 #14 May 21, 2005 Ahhh darling Christy my heart reaches out to you and I feel your pain. Oh how I wish it weren't this way but I feel your pain, ALL of it. It's coming up on one year since the most beautiful soul I think I have ever known, left us. Nate..even now when I say his name and think back to the good times, it makes my throat swell up and my stomach ache. I can't say anything that you don't already know...it has it's moments, ups and downs, and some days are still as gut-wrenching as the day it all happened. Breathe sweety, you have to breathe and let the pain flow through you, remember all the love and laughter that he shared with you, lean on your friends. God, lean on your friends. Girl, you and I are two very lucky and truly blessed people because we were able to share the most special moments and have such beautiful friendships with two amazing men..never to be forgotten. Hell I don't want to forget! I love you Christy! Breathe...one day, so they say, it will be a bit more bearable..one day.. <<<<<((((Big hugs))))>>>>> Do it Again! P.M.S. #22 LaLa Gang #4 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Salsa_John 0 #15 May 22, 2005 Smile and your sky buds smile with you... I am missing Gus.. "You did what?!?!" MUFF #3722, TDSM #72, Orfun #26, Nachos Rodriguez Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
chaoskitty 0 #16 May 23, 2005 Hey everybody.. thank you SO MUCH for your responses, encouragement, and love. Its not often that I get so upset anymore but sometimes, yes. And when it hits, its overwhelming. Each of your responses was helpful and meaningful. Thank you. Ended today with a tracking dive and felt Chris with me the whole time. Everything is OK now. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites RkyMtnHigh 0 #17 May 23, 2005 I totatally understand. Greiving has no timeline. Allow yourself to grieve. Cherish those wonderful moments and memories and know they are still here with you in spirit. they fly with you on every jump and know that one day you will rejoin again...in the most kickass dz ever. I look forward to that day when we all have our ultimate dz and we jump 24/7 and share the best of the best. "here" is temporary for us to "learn" and live our "purpose"...once we have fulfilled that purpose, it's time to "go"...at that time, we've fulfilled our "mission" here... He fulfilled his purpose and made significant impact on so many lives...fly with Chris..he's with you in spirit on every jump _________________________________________ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Peej 0 #18 May 23, 2005 It hasn't been a year since i met Chris for the first time at WFFC 2004 but i think of the time that i got to spend with him often. He was one of the most amazing people i have ever had the pleasure of knowing and i miss chatting to him via email. My thoughts and prayers are with you and with his family. My first wing suit flight in my home country this weekend will be dedicated to the man himself. Advertisio Rodriguez / Sky Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Dougjumper 0 #19 May 23, 2005 I feel Chris kicking my Ass along with Kent because I miss these guys so damn much. I can always hear him saying Doug.. your developing into a good skydiver keep up the Bird-man stuff and fly that Xaos more often and Pack Pack Pack Pack. Get out early stay late with me his exact words. His teaching me from Aff all the way through will always be with me. His words his Jokes his endurance etc. I feel he will be with me on every Jump talking to me softly. Damn what a Cool Person and Kent Damn Cool instructor as well. Peace Brothers...Be Strong Kristi with me.. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Join the conversation You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account. Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible. Reply to this topic... × Pasted as rich text. Paste as plain text instead Only 75 emoji are allowed. × Your link has been automatically embedded. Display as a link instead × Your previous content has been restored. Clear editor × You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL. Insert image from URL × Desktop Tablet Phone Submit Reply 0
RkyMtnHigh 0 #17 May 23, 2005 I totatally understand. Greiving has no timeline. Allow yourself to grieve. Cherish those wonderful moments and memories and know they are still here with you in spirit. they fly with you on every jump and know that one day you will rejoin again...in the most kickass dz ever. I look forward to that day when we all have our ultimate dz and we jump 24/7 and share the best of the best. "here" is temporary for us to "learn" and live our "purpose"...once we have fulfilled that purpose, it's time to "go"...at that time, we've fulfilled our "mission" here... He fulfilled his purpose and made significant impact on so many lives...fly with Chris..he's with you in spirit on every jump _________________________________________ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Peej 0 #18 May 23, 2005 It hasn't been a year since i met Chris for the first time at WFFC 2004 but i think of the time that i got to spend with him often. He was one of the most amazing people i have ever had the pleasure of knowing and i miss chatting to him via email. My thoughts and prayers are with you and with his family. My first wing suit flight in my home country this weekend will be dedicated to the man himself. Advertisio Rodriguez / Sky Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Dougjumper 0 #19 May 23, 2005 I feel Chris kicking my Ass along with Kent because I miss these guys so damn much. I can always hear him saying Doug.. your developing into a good skydiver keep up the Bird-man stuff and fly that Xaos more often and Pack Pack Pack Pack. Get out early stay late with me his exact words. His teaching me from Aff all the way through will always be with me. His words his Jokes his endurance etc. I feel he will be with me on every Jump talking to me softly. Damn what a Cool Person and Kent Damn Cool instructor as well. Peace Brothers...Be Strong Kristi with me.. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
