boinky 0 #1 May 31, 2005 BLONDE JOKE OF THE MONTH: A blonde decided to rent her first porno. She went to the video store and picked out a tape with a title that sounded sexy. She drove home, lit some candles, took off her clothes and placed the tape in the VCR. But nothing appeared on her screen except static. She called the video store and complained, "I just rented a porno from you, and there's nothing on the tape but static." The clerk said, "Sorry about that. Which movie is it?" The blonde replied, "Head Cleaner." *************** Two guys were hiking up a mountain when they came upon some people bungee jumping. One said to the other, "How about it?" The other replied, "No way. I came into this world because of a broken rubber. I'm not leaving it the same way." *************** Hollywood executives are working on a new movie about Amelia Earhart's fatal ride over the Pacific. The working title is "Never Findingland." *************** A new sexual position has been invented. It's called the Rodeo. A woman gets on all fours, and a man enters her from behind. Then the man wraps his arms around her waist. He whispers, "You've got the fattest ass I've ever seen," and tries to hold on for eight seconds. *************** What has 180 legs and no pubic hair? The entire front row at an Ashlee Simpson concert. *************** A Texas oil tycoon stormed into his lawyer's office and demanded that he immediately start divorce proceedings against his wife. He said, "I want to sue that adulterous bitch for breach of contract." The lawyer said, "I don't know if we'll have a case. Your wife isn't a piece of property. You don't own her." "Maybe you're right," the tycoon said. "But I sure as hell expected exclusive drilling rights." *************** What's the best thing about a nudist wedding? It's obvious who the best man is. ***************Nina Are we called "DAWGs" because we stick our noses up people's butts? (RIP Buzz) Yep, you're a postwhore-billyvance Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
