FAA Regulation of Waldo Postings

[skylord 1]

All,

I have discovered that there are currently postings of skydiving pictures on the internet that involve people who were never involved in the pic and try to appear in the background. Said persons are called "Waldos", after the famous cartoon character of the early 80's.

In recognition of this and my responsibility, I repost from the Elsinore website my reply as to Waldo training and certification:

I am happy to announce that I have given final approval to a comprehensive Waldo certification course that with successful completion of the syllabus will result in FAA certification of Basic Waldo, Intermediate Waldo, Advanced Waldo, Instructor Waldo, and Tandem Waldo.

Basic Waldo (First Waldo Course):

Ground School:
-Introduction to Waldo
-Why we Waldo
-Basic Waldo Safety
-Waldo Emergency Procedures
-What to do if you get caught
-The Four Waldo Zones
-Relaxation Techniques for your First Waldo
-Common Problems to New Waldos
-premature Waldoing
-think about baseball

First Waldo:
-supervised Waldo with two instructors on grips

Second through Eighth Waldos:
-supervised with one instructor. Eighth Waldo is a
sign off Waldo. Instructor should only supervise.

Intermediate Waldo (must have at least 50 Waldos):

Ground School:
-History of Waldo, overview
-Basic Photography Principles
-Introduction to Waldo Theory
-Your Face, and Your Waldo (Watch Jim Carrey vid)

Lab:
-demonstrate induced Waldo instability, and recover
-appear within 6 feet of a pre-selected Waldo Zone
-demonstrate basic face streching while Waldoing.

Advanced Waldo (must have at least 100 Waldos):

Ground School:
-Read every Waldo Book
-find each Waldo, identify flaws in positioning
-Advanced Waldo Theory
-f stops, shutter speed, depth of field, and you
-Reading the Photographer to time your Waldo
-Advanced Waldo Emergency Procedures
-Night Waldos

Lab:
-demonstration of getting caught, and lying to get
out of it
-demonstrate ability to post Waldos on Internet
-identify the preferred Waldo regions, and explain
-respond to certifier's scenarios, mock or otherwise
without giggling
-two night Waldos, in two different zones, with
candidate fully identifiable

Instructor Waldo (must have 150 Waldos):

Ground School:
-Fundamentals of Instruction
-Anxiety in the Student, and the value of a Solid
Bitch Slap to snap them out of it
-Getting your Students to Buy You Lunch and Beer
-The Religions that Waldo has Spawned

Lab:
-Have Students Buy You and Certifier (me) Lunch
and Beer
-Demonstration of the Slap Recovery Technique
-Fail a Student and Have Them Still Buy You Beer
for Their "First" Failure

Tandem Waldo (must have 150 Waldos):

Ground School:
-Hauling Around Someone Larger Than You in a
Harness
-The Hernia and Why It Is Your Friend
-The Know it All, and Why the Bitch Slap Works for
them, too.

Lab:
-appearing with your Tandem student in a Waldo
without blurring, or being out of focus
-appear within a 6 foot distance of the pre
selected Waldo zone with your Tandem

I think that covers it, and I have noticed a huge increase in rouge Waldos over the last month, so it is time to get this regulated. I will come up with my course prices later.

Remember, Waldo safe is my motto.

Bob Marks, FAA Associate Administrator for Waldo Certification, and Enforcement. Self Appointed W-I, W-T, and W-C (Waldo Certifier)

Bob Marks

"-when you leave the airplane its all wrong til it goes right, its a whole different mindset, this is why you have system redundancy." Mattaman

[popsjumper 2]

Does this qualify or am I out in left field?

Maybe I need training.....

My reality and yours are quite different.
I think we're all Bozos on this bus.
Falcon5232, SCS8170, SCSA353, POPS9398, DS239

[skylord 1]

Quote

Does this qualify or am I out in left field?

Maybe I need training.....

Well, two things. Number one is at that position you'd be in RIGHT field , second is you need to take my training class in order to be a bit more subtle. I'll be posting my fee schedule later....

Bob

Bob Marks

"-when you leave the airplane its all wrong til it goes right, its a whole different mindset, this is why you have system redundancy." Mattaman

[popsjumper 2]

sign me up....!

My reality and yours are quite different.
I think we're all Bozos on this bus.
Falcon5232, SCS8170, SCSA353, POPS9398, DS239

[FrEaK_aCcIdEnT 0]

im not signing up unless I get my official Waldo shirt. I assume thats what one would graduate the course in

ExPeCt ThE uNeXpEcTeD!
DoNt MiNd ThE tYpOs, Im LaZy On CoRrEcTiOnS!

[CSpenceFLY 1]

I think Robbie Rob has the Best Waldo Award for the one in Destin.Too bad we don't have a copy of that one.I wonder if they got the film developed yet