Who could use a laugh???

[Diversgodown 0]

A little long but funny


A young boy went up to his father and asked him, "Dad, what is
the difference between potentially and realistically?" The
father thought for a moment, then answered, "Go ask your
mother if shewould sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars." "Then
ask your sister if she would sleep with Brad Pitt for a
million dollars,and then, ask your brother if he'd sleep with Brad Pitt
for a million dollars. Come back and tell me what you
learn from that." So the boy went to his mother and asked, "Would you sleep
with Brad Pitt for a million dollars?" The mother replied, "Of

course I would! We could really use that money to fix up
the house and send you kids to a great University!"
The boy then went to his sister and asked, "Would you
sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars?" The girl
replied, "Oh my God!I LOVE Brad Pitt. I would sleep with him in a heartbeat,
are you nuts?! !?!?"

The boy then went to his brother and asked, "Would you
sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars?" "Of course," the brother replied.
"Do you know
how much a million bucks would buy?"

The boy pondered the answers for a few days, then went back to
his dad. His father asked him, "Did you find out the
difference between potentially and realistically?" The
boy replied, "Yes...Potentially, you and I are sitting on Three Million
Dollars..............

but Realistically,......... we're living with two Sluts and a Queer.

***Glory Favors the Bold***

[waltappel 1]

ROTFLMAO!!!

Walt

[SkiD_PL8 0]

That is a good one.

Greenie in training.

[Mayberry 0]

Don

Here's to friends!

[Diversgodown 0]

Here's another one for ya!!!!


> >>The Kitchen Bitch
> >>>
> >>>A mother was working in the kitchen listening to her 5-year-old son
> >>>playing
> >>>with his new electric train in the living room. She heard the train
> >>stop
> >>>and
> >>> her son saying,,,,,,
> >>>
> >>>"All of you sons of bitches who want off, get the hell off now... cause
> >>
> >>
> >>>this
> >>>is the last stop!!!!!! And all of you sons of bitches who are getting
> >>>on,
> >>>get your asses in the train...cause we're going down the tracks."
> >>>
> >>>The horrified mother went in and told her son,,,,,,,,,,,,,
> >>>
> >>>"We don't use that kind of language in this house. Now I want you to go
> >>
> >>
> >>>to
> >>>your room and you are to stay there for TWO HOURS. When you come out,
> >>>you
> >>>may play with your train...but I want you to use nice language."
> >>>
> >>>Two hours later, the son came out of the bedroom and resumed playing
> >>>with
> >>>his train. Soon the train stopped and the mother heard her son
> >>>say,,,,,,,,,
> >>>
> >>>"All passengers, please remember your things, thank you and hope your
> >>>trip
> >>>was a pleasant one. We hope you will ride with us again soon."
> >>>
> >>>She heard her little darling continue...
> >>>
> >>>"For those of you just boarding, remember, there is no smoking in the
> >>>train,
> >>>We hope you will have a pleasant and relaxing journey with us today."
> >>>
> >>>As the mother began to smile, the child added,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
> >>>
> >>>"For those of you who are pissed off about the TWO HOUR delay, please
> >>>see
> >>>the bitch in the kitchen....".
> >>

***Glory Favors the Bold***

[airtwardo 7]

>>Ten thoughts to ponder
>
>Number 10 - Life is sexually transmitted.
>
>Number 9 - Health is merely the slowest
>possible rate at which one can die.
>
>Number 8 - Men have two emotions: Hungry and
>Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a
>sandwich!
>
>Number 7 - Give a person a fish and you feed
>them for a day; teach a person to use the Internet and
>they won't bother you for weeks.
>
>Number 6 - Some people are like a
>Slinky.....not really good for anything, but you still
>can't help but smile when you see one tumble down the
>stairs.
>
>Number 5 - Health nuts are going to feel
>stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.
>
>Number 4 - All of us could take a lesson from
>the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.
>
>Number 3 - Why does a slight tax increase cost
>you two hundred dollars and a substantial tax cut save
>you thirty cents?
>
>Number 2 - In the 60's, people took acid to
>make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to
>make it normal.
>
>Number 1- We know exactly where one cow with
>mad-cow-disease is located among the millions and
>millions of cows in America but we haven't got a
>clue as to where thousands of illegal immigrants and
>terrorists are located. Maybe we should put the
>Department of Agriculture in charge of immigration.

~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~