1-800-MATTRESS saves tandem butts!

[veter_ 0]

After witnessing a few ambulances taking tandem passengers and quite a few rough butt landings, wouldn't a 5-minute call to 1-800-MATTRESS save 15% or more of people's butts?

I'm only half kidding here. Ground is hard and even 2-3ft/s vertical speed can damage tailbone and back. If you damage tailbone once, you know where it is for the rest of your life.

A few 150ft long 6-inch thick foam pads (covered with some carpet-like material to make it more "slidable") side-by-side to form a 150x150ft square should be plenty of room for tandems. Good for students, too. Heck, even tandem masters will stop looking as astronauts landing a shuttle with missing tiles.

Save a butt or two!!!

[AirMail 0]

Instead of carpet you could cover it with AstroGlide and make it really slick.

P-

--
It's never too late to have a happy childhood.
Postal Rodriguez, Muff 3342

[ACMESkydiver 0]

veter if you hate skydiving and skydivers so much do everyone a favor and quit.

Or at least quit posting and do the rest of us a favor.

~Jaye
Do not believe that possibly you can escape the reward of your action.

[MrBrant 0]

Or a kids slip-'n-slide.

You could call it femer-row

[piisfish 140]

Quote

veter if you hate skydiving and skydivers so much do everyone a favor and quit.

Or at least quit posting and do the rest of us a favor.

it's quite hard, but exactly what I was thinking. Your version is worded much better than what I had in mind.
golf
bowling
fishing
extreme ironing

scissors beat paper, paper beat rock, rock beat wingsuit - KarlM

[Trae 1]

in reply to.

"veter if you hate skydiving and skydivers so much do everyone a favor and quit.

Or at least quit posting and do the rest of us a favor. "


Don't include me in your 'rest of us' head trip.

If this person really speaks for more than itself we're all in serious trouble.

Yo Veter , beats me why all those tandem masters think sliding in is a good tactic.
Unless they have balloons for butts there's not much room for error.
Whatever happened to the PLF ? Don't tandem masters think it applies to them?
Not 'cool' enough probably... or do they usually let the punter take the hit .

I've seen it done and I've done it myself (Tandem PLFin' that is) ...works every time .Looks a bit awkward but it works...injury free.

problemo...
A lot of tandem masters would have trouble hitting a mattress no matter how big you made it.



The gods look different when you stand amongst them rather than bowing down before them.

[wildblue 7]

Even better, just dig a 50' x 100' pit about 20' deep and FILL it with mattrii!! Not only would there never be another tandem injury (I mean, c'mon, what TM can't hit 100' x 50'?!?) but someone with a total mal might even have a shot at living!

it's like incest - you're substituting convenience for quality

[veter_ 0]

Exactly! Landing with a beautiful girl on a giant soft mattress....... that sounds just right!!!

Total mals going in a huge freshly dug grave for instant funeral, students landing on monstrous haystacks, wingsuits swooping jacuzzi the size of a football field... We'll revolutionize the sport of skydiving!!!

[Spizzzarko 0]

Most tandem students are not beautiful girls. They are usually smelly fat dudes, who don't listen to a damn thing you tell them. Tandems suck.

[banjobill 0]

Quote

Most tandem students are not beautiful girls. They are usually smelly fat dudes, who don't listen to a damn thing you tell them. Tandems suck.

NO JOKE.

B

....with a capital P and that rhymes with T and that spells TROUBLE!!!

[veter_ 0]

No mattresses for smelly fat dudes. Wear Dainese showboard shorts and land in the cactus field. "Sorry, the wind has changed. But you signed the waiver, right?"

[JohnMitchell 16]

Quote

Whatever happened to the PLF ? Don't tandem masters think it applies to them?
Not 'cool' enough probably... or do they usually let the punter take the hit .

I've seen it done and I've done it myself (Tandem PLFin' that is) ...works every time .Looks a bit awkward but it works...injury free.

The gods look different when you stand amongst them rather than bowing down before them.

I don't think sliding in is the problem. If you do it properly, the rate of descent is small and is just like sitting down very gently. It's when you flare too high and just plunk on your butt that you have the problem. I've done your "tandem plf's" as you call them when a standup landing didn't quite work, but I still say sliding is gentle and injury free. I've never been hurt doing a sliding landing. And, no, I don't have a butt like a ballloon.

What do you mean about the "gods" comment? I'm not worried about looking "cool." I'm just trying to get my passenger back down, safe and sound.

[Trae 1]

in reply to 'What do you mean about the "gods" comment? I'm not worried about looking "cool." I'm just trying to get my passenger back down, safe and sound. "

Good on you for your priorities re passenger safety.

I just don't remember 'Sliding along on your arse"
ever sounding or looking like good landing practise...perhaps it does to the whuffos.

Most TM's I've seen relying on this technique have broken or damaged their tail-bone or left a trail of damaged passengers in their wake.
Admittedly some TM's and passengers do appear to have iron arses.
If only mildly butt stunned the passengers often don't feel it till after the adrenaline wears off.

Say you were taking an elderly but fit passenger for a tandem. Would you slide them along on their arse on purpose?

PLF's are tried and proven to be the safest way to absorb landing loads..even if you don't get the landing perfectly right . A PLF can be done easily with even a heavy passenger if you are ready for it .
And I know this from experience (heaviest I had was 130kg + he lied about his weight and passed out on the step......PLFed this guy uninjured.)

With butt slides there is no backup plan. A bit too hard a landing or a slight bump or twig on the ground and it's going up your arse. Any excess landing shocks go straight up the spine. The spine can only take so much compression before it suffers crush injuries to the vertebrae.

Also your passengers butt tends to touch down first so you don't get to feel the full load.

With a PLF you (the pilot) can ensure that it's your feet that touch the ground first thereby retaining control throughout the landing phase.

Butt landings may impress the whuffos-- especially on wet grass-- but long term bum-landing and your eventually gonna get a nasty reminder about the basics.


re the god comment ...look up self explanatory

[skydog 2]

I hate disagreeing with people.....but....

My landings are on a jump by jump basis. Some stand, some slide, some depending how far the catchers are away.

I broke my cocyx many years ago, and am quite sensitive in that area. I have to say that any of the slide in landings I have done have not aggravated this injury.

For me its all dependant on each jump how I land. I dont have any hard and fast rules saying "I will always".....

Whatevers best......

Bryn

Journey not destination.....

[Trae 1]

in reply to 'I hate disagreeing with people.....but.... '

Me too.. ..you gotta be ready for whatever comes your way & ride it right till the end. Little choice really once committed

I've got a couple of crushed vertebrae (not a skydiving injury) and so I may be a bit more sensitive on this issue.

Cheers