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Darius11

If you deal with Humans...

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Lets here the stupidest question or questions you have ever been asked.


1. A lady who was ordering a furniture item called me once and asked. “ Will I like green?”


2. Another one of my favorite was this from a customer who had a chair that she had purchased from us 1.5 years ago and was using she asked

“What does my chair look like?”

I sent her a picture no really i did.[:/]
I'd rather be hated for who I am, than loved for who I am not." - Kurt Cobain

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I was teaching a first jump course, and was asked if it's true that you can get going fast enough to make your skin fall off.

Ignorant more than stupid, but dang!

Wendy W.
There is nothing more dangerous than breaking a basic safety rule and getting away with it. It removes fear of the consequences and builds false confidence. (tbrown)

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When I was a whitewater raft guide you wouldnt believe the questions I would get asked.

One of the more common ones was, "So, are we going to come back to the same place we started?" To which our reply was, "Yes, this is the only river in the world that flows in a circle"

Someone else in our company got the comment "wow, you can't even see the rails under the water". At that point the guide pulled the boat over and had to explain to the customers that this is not disneyland, it's class 5 rafting, you can get hurt, and if they didn't pay attention and paddle it would be a very long trip down the river.

I got the best one though. I was taking a family from Kansas or someplace like that down the Royal Gorge and the father asked, "so when was this all built?" Thinking he was refering to the waterline next to the river I told him all the history about it's consturction and everything, to which he said, "no, when was the whole thing built?". So I told him about the railroad and it's history and the history of the Royal Gorge Bridge. He asked again when the whole thing was built and I finally figured out that he was refering to the whole canyon. So I promptly replied it took thousands of people and hundreds of buldozers working around the clock for 17 years to build it in 1805. He seemed satisfied with that answer. :S

Edit to add: I just remembered another good one.. Another customer walked up to the swiftly moving river and asked which way we were going. :D

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I've been asked a lot of dumb questions. Last Saturday night, I got some - all the same.

At my wedding reception this past weekend I had several people ask me: "What happened to your boutonniere?" The said this because the flower was broken off of it.

All but one person asked me this question while I was holding my son who just turned one year old three weeks prior. What the hell did they think happened to it?


My wife is hotter than your wife.

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OK this is pretty good timing...

My boss's boyfriend is a telephone guy. He was at a house installing DSL connection. He drilled a hole to the outside but when he tried to feed the cable outside, it kept going up the wall, so he went out to the truck to get the long rod thingy they use for this. He threaded into the house and went inside to find the guy laying on the floor holding his face. Apparently he decided he would 'watch him work' and got a good poke in the eye...well the corner of his eye-bridge of his nose! The guy was ok and when Brian returned to work, all his coworkers were wearing eyepatches! He still can not inderstand why the guy did that!
Life is not fair and there are no guarantees...


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I was renting this guy free diving equipment to try abalone diving in Northern California for the first time. After looking at his list of what he wanted to rent, I asked, "I assume you need a face mask as well?" His response, "no, I am not diving that deep".
_________________

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Kind of a long story but here goes:

I work in advertising. When we make a TV ad we often put together a series of hand drawn full colour storyboards that we take to the client presentation to help them understand the concept.

So i'm in the presentation room of a large government organisation and i'm reading through the script while someone else in my tem flicks through a powerpoint presentation of the storyboards. The visuals now flow exactly like the ad would except and i stress they'e HAND DRAWN.

So we finish the presentation and open the floor to questions...

The first one we get from one of the Executive Board memebers is: "Yes, but when you make the ad will it be real people or these cartoons?"

We were floored.

Advertisio Rodriguez / Sky

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A friend and I were going to eat, I wanted steak and shake so we just went through the drive thru. Well she was driving I told her my order she told hers then proceeds to ask "Do you have shakes?" I died laughing and said steak and SHAKE! Even the kid taking the order laughed.

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Yeah..fast-food joints are famous for that...

"All I want is a hamburger, thank you"

"Would you like cheese on it?"
"Would you like fries with that?"

...and then STILL screw up the order...
My reality and yours are quite different.
I think we're all Bozos on this bus.
Falcon5232, SCS8170, SCSA353, POPS9398, DS239

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I work in technology, every day I have to 'deal with humans', since no one except someone who has my job actually understands what it is that I really do.

A large part of my work is simply translating what I do into business speak - and hoping that some of it sticks.

My favorite story is the following, from the mainframe days, from ComputerWorld's shark-tank column (with a ton of 'dealing with humans' stories):

This IT pilot fish gets a call from his boss's boss. I have a friend visiting, says the boss's boss. He'd like a copy of that custom software you people wrote. Help him out.

"This was very custom software to do some very tricky graphics printing," says fish. "You had to have a certain version of the VMS operating system, a certain version of the compiler and a special line-printer driver that had been binary-patched by our local wizard. And you needed just the right model of line-printer.

"I gently informed the boss's friend that it was extremely unlikely that anyone can get our program going on his computer center's mainframe. And the two systems had no way to transfer data anyway, having incompatible magnetic media."

A few minutes later, fish's phone rings.

"It was the big boss," says fish, "gently but firmly insisting that I give the guy the program."

Fish thinks hard. How can he make a sincere effort to give the guy the program?

Finally he types a few commands -- and not long after hands the boss's boss's guest the 3-in.-thick hex dump of the program and the custom line-printer driver.

"I explained to the guy that paper was our only compatible media," fish says. "I told him he should take this dump to his computer center folks and ask them to type it into their computer.

"He went away happy. The big boss was happy. I never heard from the guy again."

TV's got them images, TV's got them all, nothing's shocking.

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