Who's deep frying the Turk?

[Vectracide 0]

So, I have been fryin my turkey for the last 3 or so years and I dont think I will ever go back to the roasting method.

Now, before you classify me as a southern hick with possums hangin off the front railing, I must inform you of my upbringing. I grew up with a mom that could cook like the dickens, and she made some of the most amazing seasonal meals that never included the words "deep fry". So, I have always been accustomed to a stuffed roasted turkey...and loved it.

Then it happened.

One year, I was at the Out-laws, and one of the black sheep (other than me) decided that he was going to prepare our bird for us..... deep fry style. I was thinking, what the fuck man! I really drove this far for a nasty, greasy, southern hump your sister dinner? I was depressed, and proceeded to consume more than 2 men for the remainder of the day for preparation of not really caring what the crap tasted like due to being quietly shit faced at the dinner table. (not like I wont be doing that this year as well, just to put up with my schitzo MIL).

So, there I am....staring at this shrunken up, crispy, pathetic excuse for a once was a turkey. I mean, dude, it was nasty looking. The meat had all shrunk up on the legs, and there were these cartilage covered bones stickin up in the air. It looked like something from a Marilyn Manson video. I was envisioning this dried up slab of leather sittin on my place, sucking up the gravy I just poured on it as if it was a new sponge that touched water for the first time. It was at this time I had conceded to myself to eating side dishes for the majority of the meal. Oh, wait....nevermind, I was at my MIL's house....the side dishes were made by her. Shit. Another meal that I need to rehydrate my body with gallons of water in order to dilute the massive salt intake I just finished consuming. I swear, if that lady ever cooked anything that didn't come out of a box or can first, I would convert to a Jehova's Witness. Shit, they don't celebrate holidays anyways, (hey.....I may be on to something here).

A couple of glasses of wine later (like right now, if you haven't noticed) I sit down to the beginning of the end. I fill my place with the essentials of a Thanksgiving dinner, except for a small slice of turkey that seemed to look respectable. Foraging my way around my plate, avoiding the turkey like it has anthrax on it, I catch the eye of my wife. It was a look that said "oh take a bite you whimp, it wont kill you". So I did. I sliced off a big chunk as to make sure I finished it off within the smallest time frame possible. I made sure there wasn't a square nanometer of it not covered with gravy as to offset the expected squirrel taste that I envisioned. I mean, for god sakes! The south peeps deep fry Twinkies! Ok!

Oh.....wait.....hey. This....this is good! Damn! Its tender, juicy and full of flavor. This tastes like the best damn turkey I have ever had! I would.....yes....I would have to say that this is better than any turkey my mom has made! NO! This is wrong. This piece must be the exception to the rule. For god sakes, this thing cooked in friggin OIL for only 45 minutes, it couldn't be this good. So, I took a couple more pieces and low and behold, they were just a good as the first piece.

Wow, I was sold. From that point on, I haven't cooked another turkey the traditional way. I fry my flightless bird for 3.5 minutes a pound every year. It is the most amazing way to cook a bird. There is no health concerns with the oil, which is peanut by the way. It doesn't penetrate the meat as long as you maintain the temp at 325F. The meat stays amazingly juicy due to the moisture not being allowed to come out of the bird. Its like the oil seals up the whole outside. Besides being very tasty, it only takes around an hour to fry it. I cooked a 21 pounder last year in 1 hour and 15 minutes. This year, I am going for a 26 pounder! Give it a try, you wont be sorry.

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Controlled and Deliberate.....

[Evelyn 0]

We have been deep frying our turkeys for years, since the first year it became popular. First time we did it was at the beach camping. We attracted quite a crowd of other campers watching the turkey fry thing. We ended up with a huge crowd and gave out samples to everyone. Luckily we had a second turkey to cook .

Life is either a daring adventure or nothing ~ Helen Keller

[bob.dino 1]

Frying Turkeys .

[jumper03 0]

turkey? pfftt

We're cooking a whole pig.

Scars remind us that the past is real

[Frenchy68 0]

I can think of 2 people on dz.com who would fry the Turk:
- Piisfish, as a proud Swiss, based on last week's incidents.
- Sen.Blutarsky. But that should move this thread to SC...

"For once you have tasted Absinthe you will walk the earth with your eyes turned towards the gutter, for there you have been and there you will long to return."

[freeflir29 0]

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I can think of 2 people on dz.com who would fry the Turk:

I'm not that far from Turkey. I'm sure I could find a couple Turks around here. Are they good fried?

[tbrown 26]

I hope you live next door to your local firehouse, best of luck.

Your humble servant.....Professor Gravity !

[chaoskitty 0]

On that note..

NASHVILLE, Tenn. (AP) -- A turkey fryer was blamed today on a fire that destroyed a home south of Nashville.

Firefighters said the owner of the home, Jim Finley of Nolensville, was frying a turkey on his back deck and left the fryer unattended.

He was the only person home at the time and was not hurt.

Finley said the fire spread so quickly, it could not be put out.

What this story doesnt say is that the homeowner is a firefighter.

[SkymonkeyONE 4]

I don't do anything BUT deep fry turkeys these days. Katie and I drove down here to Conyers, GA (outside ATL) to my mother's house. They had all the stuff to do it, but had never tried. I took command and we had ourselves the best damn 22 pound turkey you could ever wish for. 66 minutes at 375 degrees (350-400 degrees F is ideal) and wa-la! NOTHING locks in the flavor and the juices like deep frying.

It amazes me how many morons still burn their houses down doing this, but you read about it every year.

Chuck

[Vectracide 0]

Word. I enjoy standing around the turkey drinkin a beer with the family/friends making sure that temp. stays where its supposed to. You cook at 375 huh? I have always did it at 325, 3.5 minutes per pound. How long you do it for?

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It amazes me how many morons still burn their houses down doing this, but you read about it every year.

Yeah. Its quite annoying how many people had a negative reflection on this thread, due to the potential fire hazard. Anyone that frys a turkey on anything but concrete, or dirt is foolish. The ones that you see causing fires are the ones that do it on a wood deck or in their garage. What's more amazing is how many more fires are caused by Xmas lights. These usually end up in deaths, due to the fact that the lights are usually on all night when people are sleeping. Perhaps we should wish them luck, huh Tbrown? Nice half empty attitude dude. I hope you had a good safe Thanksgiving as well.

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Controlled and Deliberate.....

[McDuck 0]

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It amazes me how many morons still burn their houses down doing this, but you read about it every year.

Chuck

I mentioned wanting to do the deep-fried turkey thing to my dad and he brought up the house-burning deal. It seems to have taken on a life of it's own now. Although I will say that my dad is urban legend susceptible on a fairly regular basis. I suppose if you're a booger-eating moron who doesn't pay attention to detail, you might burn your house down that way. I suppose those same people might accomplish the same end by boiling water.

Kevin - Sonic Beef #5 - OrFun #28
"I never take myself too seriously, 'cuz everybody know fat birds don't fly." - FLC
Online communities: proof that people never mature much past high school.

[freeflir29 0]

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I suppose those same people might accomplish the same end by boiling water.

Or knitting a sweater.