Ethical/Attraction question

[deltablue 0]

No , I would not actively go after some one close to me that I knew was in a serious relationship.

Have I slept with people only to find out later that their relationship was on the rocks and they were doing it for whatever reason ? Sure, and that's not my problem........ I also sure as hell would not "date" someone like that. (big red flag)

For that matter though , I usually don't seriously think of dating anyone until at least 2-3 months or so ... many dates later.


When I do , however , I'm totally faithful and expect nothing but total honesty from myself and my woman.

~He who looks outside his own heart dreams, he who looks inside his own heart awakens - Carl Jung~

My Space

[waltappel 1]

Quote

If you were to meet someone that you were very attracted to, physically, mentally, etc., that you respected and then you found out that they were in a relationship..

How would that affect your actions? Would you continue to pursue them? Would it matter to you if they were very satisfied in their relationship vs. not so satisfied?

Now I'm not talking everyday attraction, but like, Wow! kind of stuff.

Just curious what people do in this sort of ethical dilemma.

-Karen

This one is truly a "no brainer". If they are in a relationship then I'm not interested. Period. End of story.

Walt

[karenmeal 0]

Quote

So I've got a new approach: if I become friends with a girl who's in a relationship, and either she or I start growing anything more than mild attraction for the other, I'M FUCKING HISTORY. Outy. Vapo. Gone with the wind. And I'm upfront about it, too, so there's no surprises.

I think thats a great philosophy.

I have a similiar philosophy with food.

If there is something like chocolate cake in the house, I will eat it. I will eat it all. Chocolate cake may make me feel good short-term, but too much over the long-term, its bad for you, lets you down, treats you bad. Gives you diabetes. Not like my friend the salad, salad treats me good, gives me something more satisfying than chocolate cake. Helps reduce my risk of about a bajillion types of cancer and helps me look good in a swim suit. Man I love my salad, but if there is chocolate cake around, I will eat that.

So my solution.. don't bring chocolate cake around.




Beer is my friend too.




I was born a rambling..

"Life is a temporary victory over the causes which induce death." - Sylvester Graham

[waltappel 1]

Quote

Sometimes things just happen, but to actively pursue someone who is happily involved with another person is just...crummy.

Isn't that the kind of behavior we see in those who are just looking for another notch on the bedpost? Serial conquest, in other words?

Why would anyone want to inflict that kind of pain on another human being, when it's easily avoidable?

rl

I don't think it's a matter of wanting to inflict pain. It's more a matter of not caring about inflicting pain.

For some people if they person that is getting hurt is someone they don't know or don't ever see, the "out of sight, out of mind" thing comes into play.

Overall, though, I think it's just a matter of, "I WANT!!!" being the priority.

Walt