piisfish 140 #1 February 2, 2006 Denise was a prostitute, but she didn't want her grandma to know. One day, the police raided a whole group of prostitutes at a hotel, and Denise was among them. The police took them outside and had all the prostitutes line up along the driveway when suddenly, Denise's grandma came by and saw her granddaughter. Grandma asked, "Why are you standing in line here, dear?" Not willing to let her grandmother know the truth, Denise told her grandmother that the policemen were passing out free oranges and she was just lining up for some. "Why, that's awfully nice of them. I think I'll get some for myself," and she proceeded to the back of the line. A policeman was going down the line asking for information from all of the prostitutes. When he got to Grandma, he was bewildered and exclaimed, "Wow, still going at it at your age? How do you do it?" Grandma replied, "Oh, it's easy, dear. I just take my dentures out, rip the skin back and suck them dry." The policeman faintedscissors beat paper, paper beat rock, rock beat wingsuit - KarlM Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Scoop 0 #2 February 2, 2006 Nice! yet *shuders* gross Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
PsychoBob 0 #3 February 2, 2006 That's good."I'm not a gynecologist but I will take a look at it" RB #1295, Smokey Sister #1, HellFish #658, Dirty Sanchez #194, Muff Brothers #3834, POPS #9614, Orfun Foster-Parent?" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
hobbes4star 0 #4 February 2, 2006 It has been known for many years that Sex was good exercise, but until now nobody had made a scientific study of the carbohydric content of different sexual activities. Now after "original and proprietary" research, they are proud to present, to the LOVE group, the results. REMOVING HER CLOTHES: With her consent: 12 Carbs Without her consent: 2187 Carbs OPENING HER BRA: With both hands: 8 Carbs With one hand: 12 Carbs With your teeth: 485 Carbs PUTTING ON A CONDOM: With an erection: 6 Carbs Without an erection: 4315 Carbs PRELIMINARIES: Trying to find the clitoris: 8 Carbs Trying to find the G-Spot: 4092 Carbs POSITIONS: Missionary: 12 Carbs 69 lying down: 78 Carbs 69 standing up: 812 Carbs Wheelbarrow: 216 Carbs Doggy Style: 326 Carbs Italian Chandelier: 2912 Carbs ORGASMS: Real: 112 Carbs Fake: 1315 Carbs POST ORGASM: Lying in bed hugging: 18 Carbs Getting up immediately: 36 Carbs Explaining why you got out of bed immediately: 816 Carbs GETTING A SECOND ERECTION: If you are: 20-29 years: 36 Carbs 30-39 years: 80 Carbs 40-49 years: 124 Carbs 50-59 years: 1972 Carbs 60-69 years: 7916 Carbs 70 and over: Results are still pending DRESSING AFTERWARDS: Calmly: 32 Carbs In a hurry: 98 Carbs With her father knocking at the door: 5218 Carbs With your wife knocking at the door: 13,521 Carbs PLEASE NOTE: Results may varyif fun were easy it wouldn't be worth having, right? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
