Have You Ever Milked a Cow?

[JENNR8R 0]

I always wanted to be able to say that I've milked a cow. That's definitely something I want to do before I die.

What have you always wanted to be able to say that you've done?

What do you call a beautiful, sunny day that comes after two cloudy, rainy
ones? -- Monday.

[SkydiveStMarys 0]

Ride a Harley down A1A.



Bobbi

A miracle is not defined by an event. A miracle is defined by gratitude.

[Peej 0]

Yes i have milked a cow.

Flown a fighter jet

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[mnealtx 0]

You're not missing much (from one who's been there), but whatever floats your boat...or fills your milk pail, in this instance!

Mike
I love you, Shannon and Jim.
POPS 9708 , SCR 14706

[skydiverbry 0]

No,but on a bet I tried to milk a bull. Let's just say "don't try this at home kid's"

--------------------------------------------------
Growing old is mandatory.Growing up is optional!!

D.S.#13(Dudeist Skdiver)

[RhondaLea 4]

Quote

I always wanted to be able to say that I've milked a cow.

In case you miss your chance, let me just say, you're not missing anything.

Really.

rl

If you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb

[popsjumper 2]

Yep. Worked on a dairy in my younger days as a milker.

True story - I swear.

Cows would come in from the pasture into the feed barn where they would line up at a trough to be fed and the barn hand would throw a lever that would trap their heads at the trough to keep them there until they were ready to be sent up the ramp to the milking parlor.

The cows come up the ramp to us and enter the milking stalls to be milked and then go out the other end back to the pasture.

One day we were happily milking away and suddenly there were no more cows coming up the ramp from the feed barn. Three of us went down to see what the hold-up was and as we rounded the corner, we saw:

The barn hand standing on a stool behind a heifer with his pants down around his ankles flailin' away for all he's worth. We looked at him, he looked at us and he just closed his eyes - it was one of those if-I-can't-see-them-they-can't-see-me moments.

When we recovered from the shock, we burst out laughing and at the same time the heifer arches her back and takes a dump. He feels the wet running down his legs and jumps back hitting the floor on his ass with his pants filled with cow shit.

The guy picked up his pants and ran out to his car, jumped in, pants still full of cow shit, and never came back.

My reality and yours are quite different.
I think we're all Bozos on this bus.
Falcon5232, SCS8170, SCSA353, POPS9398, DS239

[mnealtx 0]

*I've GOTTA say it!!*

"Wow, you knew Clay way back then?"

Mike
I love you, Shannon and Jim.
POPS 9708 , SCR 14706

[popsjumper 2]

You know...it very well could have been him...

My reality and yours are quite different.
I think we're all Bozos on this bus.
Falcon5232, SCS8170, SCSA353, POPS9398, DS239

[JENNR8R 0]

In case you miss your chance, let me just say, you're not missing anything.

Really.

rl

[JENNR8R 0]

I wondered how long it would take for this thread to turn trashy.

You haven't disappointed me. Good story.

What do you call a beautiful, sunny day that comes after two cloudy, rainy
ones? -- Monday.

[piisfish 140]

I did

scissors beat paper, paper beat rock, rock beat wingsuit - KarlM

[popsjumper 2]

Trashy? That's classicism!

My reality and yours are quite different.
I think we're all Bozos on this bus.
Falcon5232, SCS8170, SCSA353, POPS9398, DS239

[SuFantasma 0]

Milked a cow? Try milked 500 cows, daily for 5 years....

Y yo, pa' vivir con miedo, prefiero morir sonriendo, con el recuerdo vivo".
- Ruben Blades, "Adan Garcia"

[altichick 1]

No... but I did my work experience at a vets and had to put my hand(s) in far worse places!!

I milked a goat once... it's harder than it looks!!

Edited to add: I was only 14 at the time and my short arms meant I had to get my face a lot closer to cow butt than I wanted to!

Don't sweat the petty things... and don't pet the sweaty things!

[ccowden 0]

Milked about 60 of them, twice a day for two years. Man, I miss that!

NOT!

[diverdad 0]

Yes, grew up milking cows until about 1997 and sold them and started raising dairy replacements. ( those are young bovines, future milk cows ) Don't miss getting up early everyday 365 days a year to milk and then doing it again every night again.
I can however understand why you would want to do it just to say that you have. Your not in a real good area to find a dairy farm. The dairy epicenter is not exactly next to Washington DC.
Good luck in your quest to find a cow to milk.

Scott

[airtwardo 7]

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I milked a goat once... it's harder than it looks!!

***

My 14 year old daughter asked me why Soy Milk is so expensive...

I told her that with their really short legs, it's very very hard to milk a soy...so it cost more.

...next day I find out she was asking because she had to research it for a school discussion group!

Opps!

~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~

[JENNR8R 0]

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Yes, grew up milking cows until about 1997 and Don't miss getting up early everyday 365 days a year to milk and then doing it again every night again.

Scott

Those cows appreciated your dedication. I've had two babies. I KNOW why cows go "Moo."

What do you call a beautiful, sunny day that comes after two cloudy, rainy
ones? -- Monday.

[livendive 8]

Nope, but I know a certain dz.commer who's milked an ox!

Blues,
Dave

"I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!"
(drink Mountain Dew)

[turtlespeed 226]

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Nope, but I know a certain dz.commer who's milked an ox!

Blues,
Dave

That works with sheep as well.

I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama
BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun

[mcneill79 0]

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Nope, but I know a certain dz.commer who's milked an ox!

I must admit this is the first thing that came to mind

[GiaKrembs 0]

Quote

Quote

Nope, but I know a certain dz.commer who's milked an ox!

I must admit this is the first thing that came to mind

HA! me too

g

Raddest ho this side of Jersey #1 - rest in peace brother
Beth lost her cherry and I missed it
.... you want access to it, but you don't want to break it.

[skiskyrock 0]

Do goats count? I'm sure cows are bigger, but I imagine the smell is about the same.
A co-worker of mine attended the Milton Hershey school, which was a school for orphans and under priveledged children. They mixed a good education with lots of farm work. His vian was assigned to the dairy barns , running the milking machines. They wokee up one morning after a hurricane, and the power was out. One the new students was so excited he ran down the hall yelling to let everyone know they had the day off.
~

[livendive 8]

Quote

Quote

Quote

Nope, but I know a certain dz.commer who's milked an ox!

I must admit this is the first thing that came to mind

HA! me too

Copy cats.



Blues,
Dave

"I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!"
(drink Mountain Dew)