I Discovered the secret to running faster... (Funny. True, but funny.)

[ntrprnr 0]

So... I found the secret to running the full Central Park Loop faster...

Answer the phone - Make sure it's the woman with whom you have a second date in five hours or so.

Have her tell you that she thinks you're "nice" but doesn't think you're both going in the same direction, and better she tell it now before the date.

Have her tell you this five hours before the actual date.

Say, "No, thanks for the call, I appreciate it. Take care." Put the phone down, change into running shorts, a t-shirt, socks, and sneakers.

Walk over to Central Park.

Cue up the following songs on your iPod (among others)

DOA, Harder to Breathe, The Wreckoning, Mr. Brightside, Ready, Steady, Go, Bawitdaba, (This is) A song for the lonely, Don't Let Me Get Me, Seasons of Love (Dance Remix)...

Fuel all your anger about getting blown off, as well as all that anger you had earlier in the week about stupid clients, and force them into your feet.

Press play.

Go.

Run the Central Park Loop, all 6.023 miles of it, (including Harlem Hill) in 49:31, a new personal record, beating your old personal best by TWENTY EIGHT FREAKIN' SECONDS.

THAT'S HOW.

_______________
"Why'd you track away at 7,000 feet?"
"Even in freefall, I have commitment issues."

[sartre 0]

Just goes to show every cloud has a silver lining.....


....but she's a b#*ch anyway.

[tmaricle55 0]

She was not really your type anyway...

Be honest you're not that into her either!!

Muff Brother # 3883, SCR # 14796 ICD # 1 - Pres.
Yeah, I noticed and I think it's funny!

[jumpjunkie2004 0]

Congrats on the personal best time :)

Sorry about the girl : (

Jump, Land, Pack, Repeat...

[Brian425 0]

You should sleep with all her friends.

The only time you should look down on someone is when you are offering them your hand.

[jtval 0]

I thought this was gonna be a reference to Zeemax's fire cracker in his ass crack.

(I don't think it was he who did that be it was on his radio show...i THINK)

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[flyangel2 2]

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Have her tell you that she thinks you're "nice" but doesn't think you're both going in the same direction, and better she tell it now before the date.

Have her tell you this five hours before the actual date.

I'm not seeing a problem with this time line. Would you have rather her wait till the date to tell you? I think what happened was she was thinking about the best way to let you down easy without getting your hopes up about the date. I applause her, she was a strong enough woman to let you know just how she really felt, and didn't use you for another date.

That's why us humans date, to find what we think is the perfect mate. Now you're free to keep looking.

May your trails be crooked, winding, lonesome, dangerous, leading to the most amazing view. May your mountains rise into and above the clouds. - Edward Abbey

[jtval 0]

He's mad because he thoughthe was gonna get blown, not blown off

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[flyangel2 2]

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He's mad because he thoughthe was gonna get blown, not blown off

I thought that too, but I'm one of those <-----angelic posters, and didn't want to come off as being a bitch and posting what I was really thinking.

May your trails be crooked, winding, lonesome, dangerous, leading to the most amazing view. May your mountains rise into and above the clouds. - Edward Abbey

[jtval 0]

oops, did I come off as a bitch? LOL

well shit, I just read a post where narcimund siad he was going str8. if that can happen that i must be a bitch

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[ntrprnr 0]

2 points.

1) Why accept the date in the first place?

2) FIVE HOURS BEFORE THE DATE? I asked her out Tuesday.

That's what pissed me off. Now I have to go to a birthday party by myself, after RSVP'ing for two.

_______________
"Why'd you track away at 7,000 feet?"
"Even in freefall, I have commitment issues."

[hobbes4star 0]

u have issues

if fun were easy it wouldn't be worth having, right?

[ntrprnr 0]

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u have issues

OK, DUH.

_______________
"Why'd you track away at 7,000 feet?"
"Even in freefall, I have commitment issues."

[Broke 0]

Welcome to the nuce guy club. You want me to print up your card, or are you still in denile

Divot your source for all things Hillbilly.
Anvil Brother 84
SCR 14192

[happythoughts 0]

If one of her friends brings it up, mention that you are "kind of relieved..." "It was borderline for me from a 'standards' viewpoint." (with tone of "loser")

Then, request to drop the topic because it's a "non-issue" and you wish her the best.

Her friends will spend 30 hours debating the meaning of less than 30 words.

[NWFlyer 2]

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If one of her friends brings it up, mention that you are "kind of relieved..." "It was borderline for me from a 'standards' viewpoint." (with tone of "loser")

Then, request to drop the topic because it's a "non-issue" and you wish her the best.

Her friends will spend 30 hours debating the meaning of less than 30 words.

You are truly evil.

I suspect that might be one of the things I like about you.

"There is only one basic human right, the right to do as you damn well please. And with it comes the only basic human duty, the duty to take the consequences." -P.J. O'Rourke

[happythoughts 0]

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You are truly evil.

I suspect that might be one of the things I like about you.

The best practical jokes are ones that the victim insists on. They bring them upon themselves.

Evil is a moral judgement. I like to say "hobby", it seems less negative.

[NWFlyer 2]

Okay, how about "clever and manipulative in an utlimately harmless but amusing way"?

[happythoughts 0]

Pretty accurate. The Ultimately Harmless One is never going to get a movie made about it. The title would lack a sense of tension.

I mostly use my super powers for good now anyway.

I can definitely see a future for you as "minion".

I am going to avoid the mistake that most super-villians make. Otis. Lex Luthor (smartest evil doer and Supermans nemesis) has Otis (the bumbler) to do his tasks. Andy Griffith (Mayberry) has Otis the town drunk.

That is the key to success, no Otis.

[NWFlyer 2]

I don't do minion. Equal partner in Superheroness or I walk.

[sartre 0]

You go girl!!!

[happythoughts 0]

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I don't do minion. Equal partner in Superheroness or I walk.

Seems fair since you'd be doing all the actual effort.

We'd need cool outfits. No capes or tights (too big a package ).

We wear our red underwear under the clothes. I always thought that made the Superman outfit look goofy.

[NWFlyer 2]

Deal.

This is sounding kind of like "The Tick." I like.

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[zulu 0]

Dude, I thought I was the only one who use running to solve EVERYTHING!. I know how you feel bro.
There was a woman I was dating a while back who broke up with me because of my height. We had been seeing each other for 8 months.

I was in California at the time working as a Beach guard and I ran from my station in Santa Monica up the PCH, I have no Idea what came over me. But I ended up covering 17 miles when my teamate finally caught up with me. It was the last time I EVER approach a woman for a date.
zulu

[ImGunnaJump 0]

You know in his profile his occupation is listed as "Master of the Universe", so this would make you his "Mistress"...

Are you O.K. with that or would you require another title??

"...I've learned that while the "needs" in life are important (food, water, shelter), it's the "wants" in life (ice cream, chocolate, sex) that make it worth the effort." Kbordson