Andy_Copland 0 #1 July 19, 2006 So today is another scorching hot day and im waiting for a train at my station. This place has glass shelters and no buildings as its a tiny red neck kinda place. Anyway. I decide to walk to the only shade which is under a bike shed. This dude is standing there with his little battery clock radio and starts talking to me about....enzyms. Yes hes got something called the "sprouters handbook" or something. So i try my best to be polite and he procceeds to show me highlighted pages about the benfits of this shit, im not kidding the book looked like it was as old as the cold war. He then starts talking about radiotion from phones and how on a "bald persons head you can see the radiation making the veins swell to the brain." In the end i get bored and start reading my BPA mag to which he says "Oh yes would love to skydive, all that fresh air, your getting 100% oxygen that must be good for you" I started feeling hypoxic and rode out the rest of the time in the sun.1338 People aint made of nothin' but water and shit. Until morale improves, the beatings will continue. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
apollard24 0 #2 July 19, 2006 was this before or after he beer?Breathe out so I can breathe you in... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Andy_Copland 0 #3 July 19, 2006 Before. You meet all sorts of nutters on public transport 1338 People aint made of nothin' but water and shit. Until morale improves, the beatings will continue. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
MF42 0 #4 July 19, 2006 I would've talked to him. Sometimes crazy people spout off seriously funny stuff. Not usually, but sometimes. Matt Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Andy_Copland 0 #5 July 19, 2006 Yea but its hard to look interested without having that look on your face that says "just get the fuck away from me you lunatic"1338 People aint made of nothin' but water and shit. Until morale improves, the beatings will continue. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Rebecca 0 #6 July 19, 2006 And if you don't keep that look on your face, they might just decide you're their new best friend and adopted daddy... you've got to ask yourself one question: 'Do I feel loquacious?' -- well do you, punk? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Andy_Copland 0 #7 July 19, 2006 I could get government funding to put up with these people.1338 People aint made of nothin' but water and shit. Until morale improves, the beatings will continue. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
FlyingJ 0 #8 July 19, 2006 Hehe...I know that guy! His name's Mike.Killing threads since 2004. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Andy_Copland 0 #9 July 19, 2006 You've just confused me. You dont read the sprouters handbook by any chance do you? 1338 People aint made of nothin' but water and shit. Until morale improves, the beatings will continue. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
FlyingJ 0 #10 July 19, 2006 Nah, but I know a guy named Mike (that I run from when I see) that you described perfectly. If you were in Florida I would have thought you actually ran into him!Killing threads since 2004. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Andy_Copland 0 #11 July 19, 2006 hahahahaha Do you have one that used to shag rabbits but with therapy they managed to get him just to shag hats with the floppy ear covers? We have one of those here1338 People aint made of nothin' but water and shit. Until morale improves, the beatings will continue. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
MF42 0 #12 July 19, 2006 As long as they don't seem violent or smell too incredibly bad, I'll listen to whatever they have to say. In Barnes&Noble the other day, browsing around, and this fairly normal looking woman started asking me what I did for fun. First thought is it's a pickup line, since I am such a jaw-droppingly handsome example of pure manhood, but it's weird because she appears to be older than my mother. So I talk to her for a little bit, and she follows me around the store while I shop. Apparently the slightest polite word from me unlocked the gates to her brain, and she started this non-stop stream of consciousness narrative about her job, her home, the neighbors who she likes but who hate her, the good-for-nothing bum who she's dating every once in a while but she actually despises, all mixed in with comments about various books that I'd pick up and consider. Then she told me there's a secret code built into all bowling alleys. I tried to get her to talk about the bowling alley code, but she refused to say anything else about it, and eventually left to find somebody else to talk to. I think she was disappointed that I wasn't going to put out. So I considered the conversation worthwhile, because buried under all that mundane daily life trivia, there was this utterly fascinating revelation about bowling alleys. A bowling alley conspiracy, people. Just imagine the possibilities. Matt Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
popsjumper 2 #13 July 19, 2006 THAT'S IT!!!! A conspiracy!! Now why didn't I think of that???? So THAT'S where all those 6-10 splits come from...freakin' sabateurs..... I say hang 'em all by the balls or pin 'em to the wall...er, no puns intended...well maybe just a little. My reality and yours are quite different. I think we're all Bozos on this bus. Falcon5232, SCS8170, SCSA353, POPS9398, DS239 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
MF42 0 #14 July 19, 2006 [paranoid stoner voice] It's the shoes man. I'm tellin' ya, they're fuckin' with your shoes back there![/paranoid stoner voice] Matt Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
popsjumper 2 #15 July 19, 2006 Maybe I should return the 6 pair I have in my closet??? .My reality and yours are quite different. I think we're all Bozos on this bus. Falcon5232, SCS8170, SCSA353, POPS9398, DS239 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
MF42 0 #16 July 19, 2006 If you own a pair of bowling shoes, I think that makes you very suspect. Six pairs!? You are undoubtedly part of the Bowling Alley Code cabal, and I shouldn't even be talking to you, 'cause you could have me whacked just for what I know! Matt Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
popsjumper 2 #17 July 19, 2006 Oh...go whack yourself. My reality and yours are quite different. I think we're all Bozos on this bus. Falcon5232, SCS8170, SCSA353, POPS9398, DS239 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
MF42 0 #18 July 19, 2006 Already did earlier, thanks. Oh! You meant...right. Matt Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
popsjumper 2 #19 July 19, 2006 Andy...look around..."That Guy" was normal...YOU are the nutbar. My reality and yours are quite different. I think we're all Bozos on this bus. Falcon5232, SCS8170, SCSA353, POPS9398, DS239 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
stitch 0 #20 July 19, 2006 You didn't by chance look at him sideways, did ya???"No cookies for you"- GFD "I don't think I like the sound of that" ~ MB65 Don't be a "Racer Hater" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
livendive 8 #21 July 19, 2006 QuoteSo today is another scorching hot day . I can only imagine what qualifies as scorching hot in the UK. Blues, Dave"I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!" (drink Mountain Dew) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
popsjumper 2 #22 July 19, 2006 QuoteI can only imagine what qualifies as scorching hot in the UK. No rain or fog. My reality and yours are quite different. I think we're all Bozos on this bus. Falcon5232, SCS8170, SCSA353, POPS9398, DS239 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sartre 0 #23 July 19, 2006 Quoteits a tiny red neck kinda place. Wait, since when do they have rednecks in the UK? I thought that was a special honor only us Americans had achieved..... What does a redneck with an English accent sound like? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
MF42 0 #24 July 19, 2006 I actually encountered a real live British redneck once in Oklahoma. He was born and raised in G.B., moved to the U.S., and somehow fell into the whole pickup driving, country music listening, tobacco chewing, hunting and fishing redneck lifestyle. Had a cowboy hat, huge belt buckle, the whole works. Bizarre hearing that accent butchering a Garth Brooks song. Matt Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sartre 0 #25 July 19, 2006 How 'bout singing "Save a Horse, Ride a Cowboy" ? That would be hilarious. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Join the conversation You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account. Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible. Reply to this topic... × Pasted as rich text. Paste as plain text instead Only 75 emoji are allowed. × Your link has been automatically embedded. Display as a link instead × Your previous content has been restored. Clear editor × You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL. Insert image from URL × Desktop Tablet Phone Submit Reply 0
