micro 0 #51 October 17, 2006 QuoteQuoteBZZZZT... bullshit on this one... they CAN descend stairs if the run is wide enough and the rise isn't too tall. In my milk house (my farm was once a very prolific dairy farm back in the day) the milking stations have stairs the cows had the climb AND descend... the trick is making them suitable for them. And the steps really aren't as stretched out as you'd think. I don't know what the rise/run is, but there are like 4 or 5 of them and the milking platforms rise about 3 feet off the ground. The stairs you describe qualify as a ramp. Cows cannot descend stairs. BTW, after having their hooves trimmed, cows take longer steps. Walt ramp??? no way man... i'll take a pic for you when i get back... them fuckers are stairs!!! I miss Lee. And JP. And Chris. And... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JENNR8R 0 #52 October 17, 2006 BTW, after having their hooves trimmed, cows take longer steps. Quote There must be a correlation between that and women wearing high heels...What do you call a beautiful, sunny day that comes after two cloudy, rainy ones? -- Monday. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites happythoughts 0 #53 October 17, 2006 QuoteThe cows are artificially inseminated. I wanna know whose job it is to “harvest” the bull semen… It’s no wonder that bulls are so ornery… My bro-in-law bought 1/2 interest in a bull. They hire a guy to do that. "What'd you do today?" "Just jack off mostly." Bulls will kick your ass if they get the chance. My cousins pasture has 60 or so. If you are within 100 yds of them, they watch you the whole time in a very hostile way. QuoteDo not roll up in a fetal position in the hopes that non-threatening behavior from you will discourage an angry bull. He could toss you around until you die. I believe that entirely. They have daydream about that. QuoteIf you must defend yourself, try to find a stick and hit them on the nose or eyes. That is their only vulnerable spots. The nose is best. The ridge for the horns run across the top of the eyes. If you f- with their horns (like wrestling and such), it really pisses them off. They used to put a ring in a bulls nose because it is so tender. If you had ahold of that ring, he had to follow meekly. A herd of cows will normally come up to you because they associate people with food. However, the danger is, they are stupid and run easily, so you could get trampled. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites stitch 0 #54 October 17, 2006 This thread title needs to be changed to "Walt's useless cow facts"."No cookies for you"- GFD "I don't think I like the sound of that" ~ MB65 Don't be a "Racer Hater" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites micro 0 #55 October 17, 2006 QuoteA herd of cows will normally come up to you because they associate people with food. However, the danger is, they are stupid and run easily, so you could get trampled. this is VERY true... before i bought our two calves, i was at my friends dairy farm getting some edumacation... we were in his pasture w/ his 40+ dairy cows... big suckers too... they all came over to me and checked me out... new blood... he said they wanted to see if i brought them any treats. in moments i was SURROUNDED by beasts weighing anything for 900 to 1400 pounds. and they were pushing in close!!!! it was very intimidating. and when i made a move to get out, they spooked and all went in the same direction... including the ones BEHIND me... i nearly pissed myself. I miss Lee. And JP. And Chris. And... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites waltappel 1 #56 October 17, 2006 Feeding beer to a cow causes an increase in milk production. Walt Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites JENNR8R 0 #57 October 17, 2006 QuoteFeeding beer to a cow causes an increase in milk production. Walt Where are you going to find a skydiver who is willing to share his beer with a cow?What do you call a beautiful, sunny day that comes after two cloudy, rainy ones? -- Monday. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites happythoughts 0 #58 October 17, 2006 Another danger of being in close is that the hard area between their eyes gets sweaty and itchy. You become the scratching post. They try to rub their forehead on you and knock you down. A bad place to be. The whole movie idea of running them is stupid. Nobody wants skinny beef and dairy cows can't hardly walk. For beef cattle, you walk them into a pen and separate them with a gate. You can cut them out with a horse, but it is time consuming, dangerous, and you need a smart horse. My cousins had cattle that had never seen people. Upsetting them was a bad idea. They only had one solution to fear. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites waltappel 1 #59 October 17, 2006 QuoteQuoteFeeding beer to a cow causes an increase in milk production. Walt Where are you going to find a skydiver who is willing to share his beer with a cow? Wait until the skydiver has had at least 6 beers. By the way, cows are not bothered by poison ivy. Walt Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites micro 0 #60 October 17, 2006 QuoteAnother danger of being in close is that the hard area between their eyes gets sweaty and itchy. You become the scratching post. They try to rub their forehead on you and knock you down. A bad place to be. The whole movie idea of running them is stupid. Nobody wants skinny beef and dairy cows can't hardly walk. For beef cattle, you walk them into a pen and separate them with a gate. You can cut them out with a horse, but it is time consuming, dangerous, and you need a smart horse. My cousins had cattle that had never seen people. Upsetting them was a bad idea. They only had one solution to fear. yep, i agree... the ONE thing all my farmer buds have been telling me over and over is... DON"T scare the cows!!!! keep them calm. be quiet around them. and be slow around them unless you're in danger. get htem used to you. they have GOOD memories. and they spook VERY easy esp. since their eyesite sucks. even a coke can or a shadow may spook them if it's out of the ordinary. a calm cow is a happy cow. my calves have gotten pretty good around us now, even around our dog... he'll lie down near them, they don't even seem to notice anymore, even though he's what they would think is their natural predator. and they'll come right up to me and be all friendly. it's pretty cool. I miss Lee. And JP. And Chris. And... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites jumpinfarmer 0 #61 October 17, 2006 Wait untill your dog decides to roll in a cow flop and comes back to the house I could go on all day about cows Hey diverdad this thread is right up your ally Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites happythoughts 0 #62 October 17, 2006 QuoteWait untill your dog decides to roll in a cow flop and comes back to the house We used an old refrigerator box as a sled, on a rope behind a jeep. If the grass is thick, it slides right along. (No snow in Florida ) The cows pee wherever they are, including the edge of the ditch. If the jeep went near the ditch, the "sled" followed the contour of the land into it. People came out of that water smelling like fermented cow poo. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites micro 0 #63 October 17, 2006 QuoteWait untill your dog decides to roll in a cow flop and comes back to the house I could go on all day about cows Hey diverdad this thread is right up your ally good thing he's and OUTSIDE dog!!! I miss Lee. And JP. And Chris. And... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites JENNR8R 0 #64 October 17, 2006 People came out of that water smelling like fermented cow poo. Quote I have recently become acquainted with that lovely odor. I had an off landing into a cow pasture. My landing was perfect, but I stepped in some camouflaged cow patty on the walk out of the field. It splashed up on my new jumpsuit as I was walking too. Now I can't get the smell out of my shoes. What do you call a beautiful, sunny day that comes after two cloudy, rainy ones? -- Monday. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites popsjumper 2 #65 October 17, 2006 Cows produce mushrooms. Walt has people counting spots on cows. My reality and yours are quite different. I think we're all Bozos on this bus. Falcon5232, SCS8170, SCSA353, POPS9398, DS239 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites happythoughts 0 #66 October 18, 2006 QuotePeople came out of that water smelling like fermented cow poo. Quote I have recently become acquainted with that lovely odor. I had an off landing into a cow pasture. My landing was perfect, but I stepped in some camouflaged cow patty on the walk out of the field. It splashed up on my new jumpsuit as I was walking too. Now I can't get the smell out of my shoes. I did a jump at WFFC and landed off a ways. I saw a nice non-corn-looking field and landed, followed by my buddy. As we walked out, we were looking around for cows because of the smell. A woman gave us a ride back in her truck. She said, "Oh, we just plowed 1 1/2 tons of pig manure into that field." It took a lot of scrubbing and two wash cycles to get that smell out of my shoes. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites waltappel 1 #67 October 18, 2006 QuoteCows produce mushrooms. Walt has people counting spots on cows. ...and anyone who eats any of those mushrooms will be able to stare at the spots for hours on end, but may not be able to count past one or two. BTW, cows do not care for the taste of rhubarb. Walt Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Prev 1 2 3 Next Page 3 of 3 Join the conversation You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account. Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible. Reply to this topic... × Pasted as rich text. Paste as plain text instead Only 75 emoji are allowed. × Your link has been automatically embedded. Display as a link instead × Your previous content has been restored. Clear editor × You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL. Insert image from URL × Desktop Tablet Phone Submit Reply 0 Go To Topic Listing
happythoughts 0 #53 October 17, 2006 QuoteThe cows are artificially inseminated. I wanna know whose job it is to “harvest” the bull semen… It’s no wonder that bulls are so ornery… My bro-in-law bought 1/2 interest in a bull. They hire a guy to do that. "What'd you do today?" "Just jack off mostly." Bulls will kick your ass if they get the chance. My cousins pasture has 60 or so. If you are within 100 yds of them, they watch you the whole time in a very hostile way. QuoteDo not roll up in a fetal position in the hopes that non-threatening behavior from you will discourage an angry bull. He could toss you around until you die. I believe that entirely. They have daydream about that. QuoteIf you must defend yourself, try to find a stick and hit them on the nose or eyes. That is their only vulnerable spots. The nose is best. The ridge for the horns run across the top of the eyes. If you f- with their horns (like wrestling and such), it really pisses them off. They used to put a ring in a bulls nose because it is so tender. If you had ahold of that ring, he had to follow meekly. A herd of cows will normally come up to you because they associate people with food. However, the danger is, they are stupid and run easily, so you could get trampled. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
stitch 0 #54 October 17, 2006 This thread title needs to be changed to "Walt's useless cow facts"."No cookies for you"- GFD "I don't think I like the sound of that" ~ MB65 Don't be a "Racer Hater" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
micro 0 #55 October 17, 2006 QuoteA herd of cows will normally come up to you because they associate people with food. However, the danger is, they are stupid and run easily, so you could get trampled. this is VERY true... before i bought our two calves, i was at my friends dairy farm getting some edumacation... we were in his pasture w/ his 40+ dairy cows... big suckers too... they all came over to me and checked me out... new blood... he said they wanted to see if i brought them any treats. in moments i was SURROUNDED by beasts weighing anything for 900 to 1400 pounds. and they were pushing in close!!!! it was very intimidating. and when i made a move to get out, they spooked and all went in the same direction... including the ones BEHIND me... i nearly pissed myself. I miss Lee. And JP. And Chris. And... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
waltappel 1 #56 October 17, 2006 Feeding beer to a cow causes an increase in milk production. Walt Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JENNR8R 0 #57 October 17, 2006 QuoteFeeding beer to a cow causes an increase in milk production. Walt Where are you going to find a skydiver who is willing to share his beer with a cow?What do you call a beautiful, sunny day that comes after two cloudy, rainy ones? -- Monday. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #58 October 17, 2006 Another danger of being in close is that the hard area between their eyes gets sweaty and itchy. You become the scratching post. They try to rub their forehead on you and knock you down. A bad place to be. The whole movie idea of running them is stupid. Nobody wants skinny beef and dairy cows can't hardly walk. For beef cattle, you walk them into a pen and separate them with a gate. You can cut them out with a horse, but it is time consuming, dangerous, and you need a smart horse. My cousins had cattle that had never seen people. Upsetting them was a bad idea. They only had one solution to fear. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
waltappel 1 #59 October 17, 2006 QuoteQuoteFeeding beer to a cow causes an increase in milk production. Walt Where are you going to find a skydiver who is willing to share his beer with a cow? Wait until the skydiver has had at least 6 beers. By the way, cows are not bothered by poison ivy. Walt Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
micro 0 #60 October 17, 2006 QuoteAnother danger of being in close is that the hard area between their eyes gets sweaty and itchy. You become the scratching post. They try to rub their forehead on you and knock you down. A bad place to be. The whole movie idea of running them is stupid. Nobody wants skinny beef and dairy cows can't hardly walk. For beef cattle, you walk them into a pen and separate them with a gate. You can cut them out with a horse, but it is time consuming, dangerous, and you need a smart horse. My cousins had cattle that had never seen people. Upsetting them was a bad idea. They only had one solution to fear. yep, i agree... the ONE thing all my farmer buds have been telling me over and over is... DON"T scare the cows!!!! keep them calm. be quiet around them. and be slow around them unless you're in danger. get htem used to you. they have GOOD memories. and they spook VERY easy esp. since their eyesite sucks. even a coke can or a shadow may spook them if it's out of the ordinary. a calm cow is a happy cow. my calves have gotten pretty good around us now, even around our dog... he'll lie down near them, they don't even seem to notice anymore, even though he's what they would think is their natural predator. and they'll come right up to me and be all friendly. it's pretty cool. I miss Lee. And JP. And Chris. And... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jumpinfarmer 0 #61 October 17, 2006 Wait untill your dog decides to roll in a cow flop and comes back to the house I could go on all day about cows Hey diverdad this thread is right up your ally Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #62 October 17, 2006 QuoteWait untill your dog decides to roll in a cow flop and comes back to the house We used an old refrigerator box as a sled, on a rope behind a jeep. If the grass is thick, it slides right along. (No snow in Florida ) The cows pee wherever they are, including the edge of the ditch. If the jeep went near the ditch, the "sled" followed the contour of the land into it. People came out of that water smelling like fermented cow poo. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
micro 0 #63 October 17, 2006 QuoteWait untill your dog decides to roll in a cow flop and comes back to the house I could go on all day about cows Hey diverdad this thread is right up your ally good thing he's and OUTSIDE dog!!! I miss Lee. And JP. And Chris. And... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JENNR8R 0 #64 October 17, 2006 People came out of that water smelling like fermented cow poo. Quote I have recently become acquainted with that lovely odor. I had an off landing into a cow pasture. My landing was perfect, but I stepped in some camouflaged cow patty on the walk out of the field. It splashed up on my new jumpsuit as I was walking too. Now I can't get the smell out of my shoes. What do you call a beautiful, sunny day that comes after two cloudy, rainy ones? -- Monday. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites popsjumper 2 #65 October 17, 2006 Cows produce mushrooms. Walt has people counting spots on cows. My reality and yours are quite different. I think we're all Bozos on this bus. Falcon5232, SCS8170, SCSA353, POPS9398, DS239 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites happythoughts 0 #66 October 18, 2006 QuotePeople came out of that water smelling like fermented cow poo. Quote I have recently become acquainted with that lovely odor. I had an off landing into a cow pasture. My landing was perfect, but I stepped in some camouflaged cow patty on the walk out of the field. It splashed up on my new jumpsuit as I was walking too. Now I can't get the smell out of my shoes. I did a jump at WFFC and landed off a ways. I saw a nice non-corn-looking field and landed, followed by my buddy. As we walked out, we were looking around for cows because of the smell. A woman gave us a ride back in her truck. She said, "Oh, we just plowed 1 1/2 tons of pig manure into that field." It took a lot of scrubbing and two wash cycles to get that smell out of my shoes. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites waltappel 1 #67 October 18, 2006 QuoteCows produce mushrooms. Walt has people counting spots on cows. ...and anyone who eats any of those mushrooms will be able to stare at the spots for hours on end, but may not be able to count past one or two. BTW, cows do not care for the taste of rhubarb. Walt Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Prev 1 2 3 Next Page 3 of 3 Join the conversation You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account. Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible. Reply to this topic... × Pasted as rich text. Paste as plain text instead Only 75 emoji are allowed. × Your link has been automatically embedded. Display as a link instead × Your previous content has been restored. Clear editor × You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL. Insert image from URL × Desktop Tablet Phone Submit Reply 0 Go To Topic Listing
popsjumper 2 #65 October 17, 2006 Cows produce mushrooms. Walt has people counting spots on cows. My reality and yours are quite different. I think we're all Bozos on this bus. Falcon5232, SCS8170, SCSA353, POPS9398, DS239 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #66 October 18, 2006 QuotePeople came out of that water smelling like fermented cow poo. Quote I have recently become acquainted with that lovely odor. I had an off landing into a cow pasture. My landing was perfect, but I stepped in some camouflaged cow patty on the walk out of the field. It splashed up on my new jumpsuit as I was walking too. Now I can't get the smell out of my shoes. I did a jump at WFFC and landed off a ways. I saw a nice non-corn-looking field and landed, followed by my buddy. As we walked out, we were looking around for cows because of the smell. A woman gave us a ride back in her truck. She said, "Oh, we just plowed 1 1/2 tons of pig manure into that field." It took a lot of scrubbing and two wash cycles to get that smell out of my shoes. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites waltappel 1 #67 October 18, 2006 QuoteCows produce mushrooms. Walt has people counting spots on cows. ...and anyone who eats any of those mushrooms will be able to stare at the spots for hours on end, but may not be able to count past one or two. BTW, cows do not care for the taste of rhubarb. Walt Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Prev 1 2 3 Next Page 3 of 3 Join the conversation You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account. Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible. Reply to this topic... × Pasted as rich text. Paste as plain text instead Only 75 emoji are allowed. × Your link has been automatically embedded. Display as a link instead × Your previous content has been restored. Clear editor × You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL. Insert image from URL × Desktop Tablet Phone Submit Reply 0
waltappel 1 #67 October 18, 2006 QuoteCows produce mushrooms. Walt has people counting spots on cows. ...and anyone who eats any of those mushrooms will be able to stare at the spots for hours on end, but may not be able to count past one or two. BTW, cows do not care for the taste of rhubarb. Walt Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
